Reasons for leaving The Villages

[queasy27]

What have you heard about why people leave? Dissatisfied or normal life changes?

My experience has been 50/50 -- one couple went to Summerfield for a larger lot with more privacy and autonomy, and one moved back to her home state because she missed her children.

[jblum315]

I think most people leave for family or health reasons, not because they're unhappy here.

[asianthree]

death...sometime the other person can't stay

[rubicon]

I do not know of any state agency that compiles statistic to determine the primary reason people leave Florida but it is logical to assume that those same reasons apply to The Villages. While not a complete or exhaustive list I have heard want to go home since I am close to dying and want to be buried with......The summers are too hot. The Villages did not live up to my expectations, family issues ,I got restless and wanted new surroundings.
Too crowded. Too expensive. Insert another state and you will end up with the same reasons

[gomoho]

Wanderlust is something I could see as a reason for me personally to leave. Have never lived in the same home for more than 5 years. As a matter of fact we owned our motorhome longer than any real estate and I believe that was because we could move it when we felt like and satisfy the wanderlust we both suffer from.

[bkcunningham1]

I have a friend who has never really liked it here. She always said she missed her children and grandchildren and wanted to go back up north. They just sold their house here in The Villages and are moving back to Massachusetts the end of July. mother died a few months ago and they are moving in with her father. I know she's going to be happier.

We have flipped a few houses her in TV. A couple who owned one of the houses we bought and renovated moved back up north because the wife had developed dementia and her husband-God bless him-had fallen and lost his eyesight. He wasn't able to take care of her or himself any longer. Neighbors said he was so independent he didn't want to admit defeat nor would he allow them to help. His son moved them back up north for their own good. They were a lovely family.

We bought from another homeowner whose two daughters lived in separate states and were both still working and unable to care for her in her home in Florida. She was healthy and as strong as an ox but was also developing dementia. She was moving into an assisted living facility back up north.

That is the story I hear very often. I live on the historic side and have made friends with many, many of the original residents of TV. The other story I hear very often is how many wonderful memories people made while living in The Villages. It always makes me conscious of being alive and appreciative of each and every day. I wish I could learn to hold onto that feeling every minute instead of when I hear of someone leaving TV.

[Golfingnut]

None

[Trayderjoe]

I have a friend who has never really liked it here. She always said she missed her children and grandchildren and wanted to go back up north. They just sold their house here in The Villages and are moving back to Massachusetts the end of July. mother died a few months ago and they are moving in with her father. I know she's going to be happier.

We have flipped a few houses her in TV. A couple who owned one of the houses we bought and renovated moved back up north because the wife had developed dementia and her husband-God bless him-had fallen and lost his eyesight. He wasn't able to take care of her or himself any longer. Neighbors said he was so independent he didn't want to admit defeat nor would he allow them to help. His son moved them back up north for their own good. They were a lovely family.

We bought from another homeowner whose two daughters lived in separate states and were both still working and unable to care for her in her home in Florida. She was healthy and as strong as an ox but was also developing dementia. She was moving into an assisted living facility back up north.

That is the story I hear very often. I live on the historic side and have made friends with many, many of the original residents of TV. The other story I hear very often is how many wonderful memories people made while living in The Villages. It always makes me conscious of being alive and appreciative of each and every day. I wish I could learn to hold onto that feeling every minute instead of when I hear of someone leaving TV.

Great thoughts and if we all could do that, perhaps people would be less concerned with the little things and, like the song says, "Don't worry, be happy!"

[TommyT]

Rudeness of the people.
People stare at you when you are friendly.... no response
Impatience of the people.
People here can't drive... dangerous.
People here feel entitled and will let you know they feel this way.
Tired of people grabbing all the chairs in the squares hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing and roping chairs and tables together during events hours and hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing all the tables hours and hours before special events.
People doing as they please with property and compliance does nothing to enforce the rules.
People coming up to you in the square demanding you get out of their chair.... when the chair was empty when you sat.
The list will continue.......
And the powers to be do NOTHING !!!!!
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
Yes, I have :sad::sad::sad:

[eweissenbach]

As a snowbird, I go to a LOT of open houses, including many FSBO (I would estimate a minimum of 500 in the last 3 to 4 years), and I usually ask why the owners are selling. The overwhelming answers are: 1) Moving elsewhere in The Villages. 2) Miss the kids/grandkids/family/old friends. 3) Sickness of one or both, or loss of one or both. Of course if they are leaving because of dissatisfaction with one or more aspects of TV they, or the realtor, are unlikely to mention that to a prospective buyer.

[Mallory Voice]

What have you heard about why people leave? Dissatisfied or normal life changes?

My experience has been 50/50 -- one couple went to Summerfield for a larger lot with more privacy and autonomy, and one moved back to her home state because she missed her children.

In the 6 years we have lived here and made so many friends.........more often than not, in our experience, people leave because of health reasons.

Keep having fun and play mah-jongg!
Mallory Voice:pepper2:

[DianeM]

I have only been here for 3 weeks but, for me, it would be "I miss what was and am not yet used to what is". I truly like TV but I can understand wanting to go back home. I think my roots will always be NY.

[jblum315]

I have only been here for 3 weeks but, for me, it would be "I miss what was and am not yet used to what is". I truly like TV but I can understand wanting to go back home. I think my roots will always be NY.

I agree. I would be back in NY in a flash if I could afford it. And if I never had to shovel snow!

[DianeM]

I agree. I would be back in NY in a flash if I could afford it. And if I never had to shovel snow!

I'd go back in a "New York Minute". I could hire someone to shovel. The damn taxes are what got me.

[duffysmom]

We are all so different.:shrug: You could not pay me to move back to NY and I lived in upstate as well as NYC. I haven't met anyone who wants to move out of TV but have met many who moved to new homes in TV.

[perrjojo]

[QUOTE=TommyT;700315]Rudeness of the people.
People stare at you when you are friendly.... no response
Impatience of the people.
People here can't drive... dangerous.
People here feel entitled and will let you know they feel this way.
Tired of people grabbing all the chairs in the squares hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing and roping chairs and tables together during events hours and hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing all the tables hours and hours before special events.
People doing as they please with property and compliance does nothing to enforce the rules.
People coming up to you in the square demanding you get out of their chair.... when the chair was empty when you sat.
The list will continue.......
And the powers to be do NOTHING !!!!!
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
Yes, I have :sad::sad::sad:[/QUOTE

Wow! I hope this in jest..

[billethkid]

Rudeness of the people.
People stare at you when you are friendly.... no response
Impatience of the people.
People here can't drive... dangerous.
People here feel entitled and will let you know they feel this way.
Tired of people grabbing all the chairs in the squares hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing and roping chairs and tables together during events hours and hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing all the tables hours and hours before special events.
People doing as they please with property and compliance does nothing to enforce the rules.
People coming up to you in the square demanding you get out of their chair.... when the chair was empty when you sat.
The list will continue.......
And the powers to be do NOTHING !!!!!
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
Yes, I have :sad::sad::sad:

great list describing the maybe 2%.....
My favorite subject of how the minority count gets the attention while the 98% go merrily, happily and contented on our way.

btk

[DianeM]

We are all so different.:shrug: You could not pay me to move back to NY and I lived in upstate as well as NYC. I haven't met anyone who wants to move out of TV but have met many who moved to new homes in TV.

I'm certainly not even thinking of leaving TV but I do miss my life and friends. This too shall pass.

[BarryRX]

In the two years we have lived in a CYV in Pennecamp, the house next to us has been sold twice. The first folks who lived upsized to a new home right on Pelican golf course. The second folks who are moving are moving for what I think is a pretty common reason. He loves it here, she....not so much. Then, they had the birth of their first grandchild. That tipped the scales and they are moving back north to be closer to the baby.

[JerryP]

I have only been here for 3 weeks but, for me, it would be "I miss what was and am not yet used to what is". I truly like TV but I can understand wanting to go back home. I think my roots will always be NY.

Always a New Yorker, ENY, I would never move back.

[gemorc]

We have been here for six years now, and we are seriously considering leaving. Reasons for leaving:
1. TV has just gotten too big for it's own britches. The infrastructure is too small to handle the traffic.
2. Our lifestyles have changed. TV moves to a much more hastened pace. The people don't seem to be as friendly. The developer's presence is greatly felt more than ever before.
3. The last reason, I am a golfer. I am a priority member. We have eleven courses to play, and until three weeks ago, not one of them compared to a decent municipal course in Michigan. Anyone who has played off the reservation, knows what I mean. Until Golf management Solutions realizes that course conditions are more important than rounds being played, we will never have quality golf.

We will not be leaving north central Florida. We are just seeking a softer, hassle free environment.

[gomoho]

We have been here for six years now, and we are seriously considering leaving. Reasons for leaving:
1. TV has just gotten too big for it's own britches. The infrastructure is too small to handle the traffic.
2. Our lifestyles have changed. TV moves to a much more hastened pace. The people don't seem to be as friendly. The developer's presence is greatly felt more than ever before.
3. The last reason, I am a golfer. I am a priority member. We have eleven courses to play, and until three weeks ago, not one of them compared to a decent municipal course in Michigan. Anyone who has played off the reservation, knows what I mean. Until Golf management Solutions realizes that course conditions are more important than rounds being played, we will never have quality golf.

We will not be leaving north central Florida. We are just seeking a softer, hassle free environment.

I hear ya!

[Challenger]

We have been here for six years now, and we are seriously considering leaving. Reasons for leaving:
1. TV has just gotten too big for it's own britches. The infrastructure is too small to handle the traffic.
2. Our lifestyles have changed. TV moves to a much more hastened pace. The people don't seem to be as friendly. The developer's presence is greatly felt more than ever before.
3. The last reason, I am a golfer. I am a priority member. We have eleven courses to play, and until three weeks ago, not one of them compared to a decent municipal course in Michigan. Anyone who has played off the reservation, knows what I mean. Until Golf management Solutions realizes that course conditions are more important than rounds being played, we will never have quality golf.

We will not be leaving north central Florida. We are just seeking a softer, hassle free environment.

" you can please some of the people, all of the time. You can please all of the people, some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time:pepper2:

[janmcn]

I've heard of a few people leaving in search of better healthcare facilities, especially as we become an older population and these concerns become paramount.

[Happinow]

I don't think I will ever be leaving TV. While I miss family back home and my daughter and grand daughter in NC, I am making a wonderful life here with my husband and we are happy. If I were to leave ???? First would be my grand baby....I so wish i was closer. Next would be because it is getting way too busy here and not enough services to support the people, even in the summer months. Then, I worry about getting older and the health care being substandard. That really scares me. As far as the people and the beauty of the area it is far superior to anywhere else I've lived. I don't mind the got summer...beats out the colds winters and having to deal with the snow, ice and sleet any day. For us, this is where we call home now.

[DianeM]

Always a New Yorker, ENY, I would never move back.

If I could afford to go back I might consider it.

[kittygilchrist]

If I could afford to go back I might consider it.

you can't leave. :spoken:

[fb32162]

We have had 3 neighbors leave in 2 yrs. One left because they say they aren't "joiners". They never participated in neighborhood or community get togethers and they weren't golfers. They moved to a smaller (and cheaper) 55+ community closer to Orlando. One left to return to their former state because they had never lived anywhere else and they couldn't get used to things not being just like their former community. The third left to be close to family because of health reasons. One thing I noticed was that all three always referred to their former community as "home". It seemed that none ever really saw TV as "home"

[manaboutown]

We have had 3 neighbors leave in 2 yrs. One left because they say they aren't "joiners". They never participated in neighborhood or community get togethers and they weren't golfers. They moved to a smaller (and cheaper) 55+ community closer to Orlando. One left to return to their former state because they had never lived anywhere else and they couldn't get used to things not being just like their former community. The third left to be close to family because of health reasons. One thing I noticed was that all three always referred to their former community as "home". It seemed that none ever really saw TV as "home"

"Home" is where one wants to be buried. Any cemeteries in TV?

[DianeM]

We have had 3 neighbors leave in 2 yrs. One left because they say they aren't "joiners". They never participated in neighborhood or community get togethers and they weren't golfers. They moved to a smaller (and cheaper) 55+ community closer to Orlando. One left to return to their former state because they had never lived anywhere else and they couldn't get used to things not being just like their former community. The third left to be close to family because of health reasons. One thing I noticed was that all three always referred to their former community as "home". It seemed that none ever really saw TV as "home"

Home is where you grew up and lived your life and made memories.

[Uptown Girl]

Home is where you grew up and lived your life and made memories.

To me, 'Home' is what feels like home in your heart.
It was my desire to make The Villages my home. I embraced that and brought with me the select, fond memories of where I had lived in the past. My happy memories are alive and well and I appreciate having them to 'visit' in my mind whenever I want. They are part of who I am.

I still keep the dearest family and friends in my heart and communicate with them intimately when we each have the opportunity. I have not lost them, nor they me.
I have made new friends and have new activities, beautiful new surroundings and new things to explore, to add to my life's journey.

I was one who never expected to be able to have the luxury of this freedom. My nose was to the grindstone out of necessity. I made everything and everybody my first priority/responsibiilty and always put myself last in line.
I never thought I would be in a position to enjoy this lifestyle. After my obligations were complete, my biggest adjustment was giving myself
PERMISSION to choose what would bring ME nourishment and personal joy.

My joy is living here with the husband I adore. I am content and grateful every day to have had this choice to make. Is The Villages perfect? Would anyplace else be?

[Ohiogirl]

We are snowbirds but spend more of time in TV, as the tax advantage to being Florida residents is very compelling. Originally thought we we would be fulltime in TV as didn't think we could afford 2 places. Found out we could do both as Florida is very inexpensive, and we downsized up here. The Villages is pretty much what we thought it would be, but we came on vacations for 4 years or so before retiring and moving down.

I think some people don't give it enough time to get settled in and find their niches. It takes time to make good friends. Some people are just not good movers and need the familiar. I think those are the ones who move back, especially the ones whose families are close and concentrated in the home area they came from. If you think this might be you, my advice would be to look seriously into snowbirding, but at the same time give it an honest chance and delve in to what appealed to you here in the first place.

I've seen some short term snowbirds and snowflakes simply treat TV time as a vacation and not seeming to get involved with neighbors or activities, especially if they mostly visit at the same time as their friends from their hometown. To each his own, I guess, but what happens when some/all of their friends stop coming as their age and health problems mount?

We would have been ok being frogs, as we are both joiners, but glad we have the opportunity to come back north in the summer. We like all the cultural stuff and other opportunities in Columbus and surrounds, and also expect to do some northern traveling from time to time, although I think travel will lesson as we age.

I know several who have moved out. Reasons:
- don't golf and cheaper to have a big home with a bigger lot outside The Villages (this couple moved to Citrus Hills).
- single woman who has children in various locations, has mostly couple friends and was bored, but didn't seem to me to make an effort to get to know other singles (TV was her 2nd retirement move, not her last).
- life revolves around the grandchildren (who then turn 12 or 13 and move on quickly to their own lives).

I've also met widows, who originally moved to TV with their husbands, who were pressured to move back near their families and didn't, and are glad they stayed in TV. They just do more here than would if they'd moved back. Of course, some are happier back with families. Know thyself.

I just think back to my Mom's later years, and parents of others I know, and don't want to repeat the lifestyle of sitting around all winter glued to the TV and concerned about falling on ice or snow when they do venture out. Yes, there are things to do everywhere, but it is easier to do most of them in TV, and also to try new things. I think our kids are grateful that we have a life other than them, although I know this can change as we age.

In our condo here in Ohio, have met a neighbor who spent the first 14 years of their retirement as RV snowbirds (winters in Florida, summers traveling) and the last 4 or 5 (after the driving and travel got to be difficult) spending summers near family in a condo. Now she's alone - husband died last fall - and has truly wonderful retirement memories. No regrets. I think that some people, certainly not all, look back when they are in their 80s and wish they had had more adventure and now feel it is too late.

Think hard about all the scenarios that might happen, and have some backup plans, but live your life - at least that's my HO.

[CFrance]

We've lived a few different places since we've been married. We were always happy wherever we lived. However, whenever we were living in Place B, for instance, we referred to Place A as "home." Then when we would go "home" to visit Place A, we would refer to Place B as "home" while visiting. Huh?? I've often wondered about that. I'm sure there's some deep psychological defect in my thought processes. ;-0

[cquick]

What have you heard about why people leave? Dissatisfied or normal life changes?

My experience has been 50/50 -- one couple went to Summerfield for a larger lot with more privacy and autonomy, and one moved back to her home state because she missed her children.

I would probably leave to be near family, if they didn't live here! I only have cousins "up north". My mom lives here in TV. 'course I do have a grown up son in California......

[skip0358]

I have everything I need here, a very comfortable life, my wife and great friends. I have a few family up North, they can come visit here or we can hop on a plane for up there. If up North had been so great I wouldn't have moved here in the first place. JMO

[gocubsgo]

I miss my daughter and want to move back to see more of her. I also miss Chicago and all it has to offer. I would like to move to Missouri and buy a house in the country. Here, it's just too congested in the winter. I miss privacy and peace and quiet.

[My Daily Run]

I have been here 3 years and got home sick in April so I went back up north to visit and realized how depressed, unhealthy, bored, and unhappy my friends are. All they did was complain about the winters, the weather in general, the taxes, the deplorable neighborhood, foreclosures, their kids etc. etc. etc. My son and daughter in law were working and my grandson (who is 10) was in school and busy with his friends. I was supposed to stay 2 weeks and after a week I was ready to come back to The Villages...I had difficulty telling them about my lifestyle as I didn't want to brag...after 10 days I flew back home and wanted to kiss the ground when I arrived...I told my son I will only go back up north if I have dementia and I don't know I'm there.

[Uncle Tom]

Rudeness of the people.
People stare at you when you are friendly.... no response
Impatience of the people.
People here can't drive... dangerous.
People here feel entitled and will let you know they feel this way.
Tired of people grabbing all the chairs in the squares hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing and roping chairs and tables together during events hours and hours before the event.
Tired of people grabbing all the tables hours and hours before special events.
People doing as they please with property and compliance does nothing to enforce the rules.
People coming up to you in the square demanding you get out of their chair.... when the chair was empty when you sat.
The list will continue.......
And the powers to be do NOTHING !!!!!
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
etc.
Yes, I have :sad::sad::sad:

Very well said the squares are turning out for free loaders bringing their coolers blocking parking spaces, grabbing plastic chairs. We dont go to Lake Sumter any more because of that reason. We use to go to all the resturants, but cant find a parking space.

[queasy27]

Home is where you grew up and lived your life and made memories.

That's an interesting distinction. Does it make a difference for you if family is still there or not? I spent my first 35 years in California, but I'd never call that home any more -- it's simply "where I grew up." I don't maintain more than one residence, so home for me is definitely TV.

Here, it's just too congested in the winter.

Also interesting to me! Truly, the traffic seems so minimal here that I don't even notice it. When I lived in Lady Lake on the historic side, there wasn't much difference in seasonal traffic because a lot of the stores and restaurants on 441/27 are heavily used by non-Villagers, anyway. When I moved to Summerhill, I definitely noticed that traffic and crowds are less now that it's summer, but I never thought they were bad in the first place.

Is traffic here really worse than Chicago?

(And I'm not minimizing the toll traffic can take on people; I fought it for years and got home from work in a cross mood every day.)

[senior citizen]

..............

[DianeM]

That's an interesting distinction. Does it make a difference for you if family is still there or not? I spent my first 35 years in California, but I'd never call that home any more -- it's simply "where I grew up." I don't maintain more than one residence, so home for me is definitely TV.

I don't think that family being there or not makes a difference. Family can be way overrated. It's a feeling or a memory that is conjured up whenever you think of "home".

[senior citizen]

..............

[senior citizen]

...........

[eweissenbach]

I don't think that family being there or not makes a difference. Family can be way overrated. It's a feeling or a memory that is conjured up whenever you think of "home".

I suppose family CAN be way overrated, but many of us think family is underrated, if anything. I am happier around my kids, grandkids, and extended family than anyone else in the world. That is not to say that getting away to TV is not enjoyable - it certainly is, and we come with our good friends of 45+years, so bring some of that with us. I moved around frequently in my career, and was happy everywhere we lived, but always cherished any time that I spent with my family. Happiness is not a geographical location.

[DianeM]

Not all families are created equal. Some are just comprised of people you share DNA with. Some are wonderful. It's the luck of the draw.

[Happinow]

I think sometimes geological location is happiness. I was not happy where I came from, even though my family was there. I miss them a lot, but my current location in Florida has made me much happier than I've ever been, so for me location plays a huge part of my happiness.

[Schaumburger]

As a snowbird, I go to a LOT of open houses, including many FSBO (I would estimate a minimum of 500 in the last 3 to 4 years), and I usually ask why the owners are selling. The overwhelming answers are: 1) Moving elsewhere in The Villages. 2) Miss the kids/grandkids/family/old friends. 3) Sickness of one or both, or loss of one or both. Of course if they are leaving because of dissatisfaction with one or more aspects of TV they, or the realtor, are unlikely to mention that to a prospective buyer.

Oldcoach Ed, You may be the king of the open houses LOL. Every time I have rented in TV I have attended open houses, and I usually ask (politely, as in "Do you mind telling me why the house is for sale?"). Most of the time it has been "the owner bought another home in The Villages" or "the owner lived in TV for many years, but he/she is moving back up north for health reasons to be closer to their child/children". A couple of time it has been "the owner passed away, and the children are selling the home." I am glad I am not the only one who asks why a home is for sale.

[patfla06]

We are snowbirds but spend more of time in TV, as the tax advantage to being Florida residents is very compelling. Originally thought we we would be fulltime in TV as didn't think we could afford 2 places. Found out we could do both as Florida is very inexpensive, and we downsized up here. The Villages is pretty much what we thought it would be, but we came on vacations for 4 years or so before retiring and moving down.

I think some people don't give it enough time to get settled in and find their niches. It takes time to make good friends. Some people are just not good movers and need the familiar. I think those are the ones who move back, especially the ones whose families are close and concentrated in the home area they came from. If you think this might be you, my advice would be to look seriously into snowbirding, but at the same time give it an honest chance and delve in to what appealed to you here in the first place.

I've seen some short term snowbirds and snowflakes simply treat TV time as a vacation and not seeming to get involved with neighbors or activities, especially if they mostly visit at the same time as their friends from their hometown. To each his own, I guess, but what happens when some/all of their friends stop coming as their age and health problems mount?

We would have been ok being frogs, as we are both joiners, but glad we have the opportunity to come back north in the summer. We like all the cultural stuff and other opportunities in Columbus and surrounds, and also expect to do some northern traveling from time to time, although I think travel will lesson as we age.

I know several who have moved out. Reasons:
- don't golf and cheaper to have a big home with a bigger lot outside The Villages (this couple moved to Citrus Hills).
- single woman who has children in various locations, has mostly couple friends and was bored, but didn't seem to me to make an effort to get to know other singles (TV was her 2nd retirement move, not her last).
- life revolves around the grandchildren (who then turn 12 or 13 and move on quickly to their own lives).

I've also met widows, who originally moved to TV with their husbands, who were pressured to move back near their families and didn't, and are glad they stayed in TV. They just do more here than would if they'd moved back. Of course, some are happier back with families. Know thyself.

I just think back to my Mom's later years, and parents of others I know, and don't want to repeat the lifestyle of sitting around all winter glued to the TV and concerned about falling on ice or snow when they do venture out. Yes, there are things to do everywhere, but it is easier to do most of them in TV, and also to try new things. I think our kids are grateful that we have a life other than them, although I know this can change as we age.

In our condo here in Ohio, have met a neighbor who spent the first 14 years of their retirement as RV snowbirds (winters in Florida, summers traveling) and the last 4 or 5 (after the driving and travel got to be difficult) spending summers near family in a condo. Now she's alone - husband died last fall - and has truly wonderful retirement memories. No regrets. I think that some people, certainly not all, look back when they are in their 80s and wish they had had more adventure and now feel it is too late.

Think hard about all the scenarios that might happen, and have some backup plans, but live your life - at least that's my HO.

Thanks for the great post! Very thoughtful.

[DandyGirl]

Home is where you grew up and lived your life and made memories.

Gotta disagree with that. Many of us left where we grew up and lived a lot of different places due to jobs or the military. I wouldn't give that up for anything. I do think of The Villages as home.

[patfla06]

Change is hard. Moving is hard.
And both at an older age are really hard!

You get in a comfort level of knowing where everything is,
having family and friends around and just loving your HOME.

No matter how great T.V. Is, when you first get there you need
TIME for it to become HOME.
Now if we can just sell our Tampa house I could start figuring
out our new life!

[DianeM]

Gotta disagree with that. Many of us left where we grew up and lived a lot of different places due to jobs or the military. I wouldn't give that up for anything. I do think of The Villages as home.

It hasn't been long enough for me to call TV home. Sadly, right now it's just where my stuff is. Hopefully this feeling will be short lived.

[DianeM]

Change is hard. Moving is hard.
And both at an older age are really hard!

You get in a comfort level of knowing where everything is,
having family and friends around and just loving your HOME.

No matter how great T.V. Is, when you first get there you need
TIME for it to become HOME.
Now if we can just sell our Tampa house I could start figuring
out our new life!

Excellent view. This isn't home YET. Hopefully it will get better.

[LvmyPug2]

I have always believed home is where I feel a sense of belonging. For me, that is here in TV. This feeling didn't happen overnight. The first year after moving here, it felt like we were on a long vacation. Everything seemed different and we were always comparing things to "back home". Then, it slowly started to sink in that this was our home.

[DianeM]

I have always believed home is where I feel a sense of belonging. For me, that is here in TV. This feeling didn't happen overnight. The first year after moving here, it felt like we were on a long vacation. Everything seemed different and we were always comparing things to "back home". Then, it slowly started to sink in that this was our home.

That is my dream

[katerogers]

If I could afford to go back I might consider it.

Diane,
Wow! This is certainly discouraging. Here I am a mere two months from my adventure into the unknown and I remember when you were in the same position and all excited about your moving to the Villages. What is it exactly that has burst that bubble? Have you ventured into the social scene and it didn't meet the expectations you had...and I have at the moment? Is it anything specific that has cause you to consider a return ticket?

Katie

[Shimpy]

The only reason I would consider to move from TV would be to live in the mountains of Tenn, N.C., or in the Rocky mountains. That said and analyzed I've got to ask myself, what the hell would I do there to keep myself busy. After taking in the beautiful scenery what would I do? I'm sure I wouldn't find friends to play Bocci with 3 days a week, or go to the pool every day and see all my neighborhood friends to float around and BS with not to mention going to the squares.
I think I'll stay put.

[gomoho]

The only reason I would consider to move from TV would be to live in the mountains of Tenn, N.C., or in the Rocky mountains. That said and analyzed I've got to ask myself, what the hell would I do there to keep myself busy. After taking in the beautiful scenery what would I do? I'm sure I wouldn't find friends to play Bocci with 3 days a week, or go to the pool every day and see all my neighborhood friends to float around and BS with not to mention going to the squares.
I think I'll stay put.

And that is exactly why I pray every night the TV magically transfers its existence to the mountains - and if that doesn't work if someone would just possibly build a Village like community in the mountains. What fun sharing hiking, and waterfalls, and off roading with these friends (along with all the good stuff we currently have).

[Shimpy]

And that is exactly why I pray every night the TV magically transfers its existence to the mountains - and if that doesn't work if someone would just possibly build a Village like community in the mountains. What fun sharing hiking, and waterfalls, and off roading with these friends (along with all the good stuff we currently have).

We have friends that live in Lake Lure N.C. and love to visit to see all those beautiful mountains but have realized that they are only a long days drive away and we can stay here and enjoy paradise when the weather is bad up there.

[DianeM]

Diane,
Wow! This is certainly discouraging. Here I am a mere two months from my adventure into the unknown and I remember when you were in the same position and all excited about your moving to the Villages. What is it exactly that has burst that bubble? Have you ventured into the social scene and it didn't meet the expectations you had...and I have at the moment? Is it anything specific that has cause you to consider a return ticket?

Katie

No Katie - not at all. I'm very contented here and have been out every day this week doing something. Nothing to be discouraged about at all. I'm just not used to this being home YET. It's only been 3 weeks. I'm not yet used to what is and I miss what was. This too shall pass.

[Suzi]

To me, 'Home' is what feels like home in your heart.
It was my desire to make The Villages my home. I embraced that and brought with me the select, fond memories of where I had lived in the past. My happy memories are alive and well and I appreciate having them to 'visit' in my mind whenever I want. They are part of who I am.

I still keep the dearest family and friends in my heart and communicate with them intimately when we each have the opportunity. I have not lost them, nor they me.
I have made new friends and have new activities, beautiful new surroundings and new things to explore, to add to my life's journey.

I was one who never expected to be able to have the luxury of this freedom. My nose was to the grindstone out of necessity. I made everything and everybody my first priority/responsibiilty and always put myself last in line.
I never thought I would be in a position to enjoy this lifestyle. After my obligations were complete, my biggest adjustment was giving myself
PERMISSION to choose what would bring ME nourishment and personal joy.

My joy is living here with the husband I adore. I am content and grateful every day to have had this choice to make. Is The Villages perfect? Would anyplace else be?

How beautiful is that!

[senior citizen]

...........

[lovsthosebigdogs]

We are snowbirds but spend more of time in TV, as the tax advantage to being Florida residents is very compelling. Originally thought we we would be fulltime in TV as didn't think we could afford 2 places. Found out we could do both as Florida is very inexpensive, and we downsized up here. The Villages is pretty much what we thought it would be, but we came on vacations for 4 years or so before retiring and moving down.

I think some people don't give it enough time to get settled in and find their niches. It takes time to make good friends. Some people are just not good movers and need the familiar. I think those are the ones who move back, especially the ones whose families are close and concentrated in the home area they came from. If you think this might be you, my advice would be to look seriously into snowbirding, but at the same time give it an honest chance and delve in to what appealed to you here in the first place.

I've seen some short term snowbirds and snowflakes simply treat TV time as a vacation and not seeming to get involved with neighbors or activities, especially if they mostly visit at the same time as their friends from their hometown. To each his own, I guess, but what happens when some/all of their friends stop coming as their age and health problems mount?

We would have been ok being frogs, as we are both joiners, but glad we have the opportunity to come back north in the summer. We like all the cultural stuff and other opportunities in Columbus and surrounds, and also expect to do some northern traveling from time to time, although I think travel will lesson as we age.

I know several who have moved out. Reasons:
- don't golf and cheaper to have a big home with a bigger lot outside The Villages (this couple moved to Citrus Hills).
- single woman who has children in various locations, has mostly couple friends and was bored, but didn't seem to me to make an effort to get to know other singles (TV was her 2nd retirement move, not her last).
- life revolves around the grandchildren (who then turn 12 or 13 and move on quickly to their own lives).

I've also met widows, who originally moved to TV with their husbands, who were pressured to move back near their families and didn't, and are glad they stayed in TV. They just do more here than would if they'd moved back. Of course, some are happier back with families. Know thyself.

I just think back to my Mom's later years, and parents of others I know, and don't want to repeat the lifestyle of sitting around all winter glued to the TV and concerned about falling on ice or snow when they do venture out. Yes, there are things to do everywhere, but it is easier to do most of them in TV, and also to try new things. I think our kids are grateful that we have a life other than them, although I know this can change as we age.

In our condo here in Ohio, have met a neighbor who spent the first 14 years of their retirement as RV snowbirds (winters in Florida, summers traveling) and the last 4 or 5 (after the driving and travel got to be difficult) spending summers near family in a condo. Now she's alone - husband died last fall - and has truly wonderful retirement memories. No regrets. I think that some people, certainly not all, look back when they are in their 80s and wish they had had more adventure and now feel it is too late.

Think hard about all the scenarios that might happen, and have some backup plans, but live your life - at least that's my HO.

I totally agree with your post. Great insight. Home takes some getting used to. My husband moved me to our current location in PA over 9 years ago from my lifelong home on the Jersey Shore and this never has felt like home to me, just the place we live. We have vacationed and spent many weeks at a time in the French Quarter and I always cry when I get there and cry when I leave because that feels as much like home to me as NJ does. When we had our LSV I was very impressed with TV and felt like it could also be home for us so we decided to buy a home (which we did). I am hoping when we actually move in those feelings of 'being home' will happen for us in TV also. I think some places just feel right and some don't. I'm betting on it happening for us. That's why we bought our home (keep your fingers crossed for me!).

[Barefoot]

A reverse question which I will ask again...........can "non joiners" as people have called them.........really find happiness in TV? What about living each day, one day at a time, without running from club to club? What about the people from small mountain towns. Those who are the creative type who enjoy activities in small doses, not "round the clock" busyness?

SC, I know you've asked this question before, here is just one humble opinion.

There are many "non joiners" happily living in The Villages. There is some busyness at the Rec Centers, in the Town Squares and at the Shopping Plazas. And many people thrive on the activities. But also, there is a lot of serenity within the neighborhoods themselves.

People from small mountain towns might want to consider a smaller home on a view lot over a large home with kissing lanai's. We came from a rural area. We enjoy golf, the town squares and the activities offered by The Villages lifestyle. But we love returning to our home. We spend a lot of relaxing time in our birdcage reading and watching the birds on the ponds.

I think that older, established neighborhoods are probably quieter than the new areas south of 466A, which have a lot of young retirees looking for new adventures.

[gomoho]

Guys:
Small towns and mountain towns do have people to befriend, as well as community activities if one wanted to join in ..........really they do. Along with their beautiful vistas and views plus deep cool forests, they really have plenty of things to do, both solitary and with a group or just one good friend

Not looking for a small mountain town - looking for all The Villages offers in a mountain
town. My husband and I are not joiners and don't engage in clubs and the only activity we regularly participate in is golf; however, we do so with a great group of folks and enjoy going to different places for breakfast. I am referring to the way the grounds are so beautifully landscaped and maintained and the convenience of nearby shopping, doctors and restaurants. And the fact that The Villages offers so much it attracts a very interesting group of people.

[graciegirl]

Guys:
Small towns and mountain towns do have people to befriend, as well as community activities if one wanted to join in ..........really they do. Along with their beautiful vistas and views plus deep cool forests, they really have plenty of things to do, both solitary and with a group or just one good friend

Not looking for a small mountain town - looking for all The Villages offers in a mountain
town. My husband and I are not joiners and don't engage in clubs and the only activity we regularly participate in is golf; however, we do so with a great group of folks and enjoy going to different places for breakfast. I am referring to the way the grounds are so beautifully landscaped and maintained and the convenience of nearby shopping, doctors and restaurants. And the fact that The Villages offers so much it attracts a very interesting group of people.

I agree with Gomoho, who I have never met in person and who I consider a friend and also with Barefoot who I do know but don't see enough. I love the opportunity to go and paint with others quietly at the Art Studios, walk around the room and see what others are doing, work on my own panting, get a little help from people better than me and enjoy looking at their projects.

I like the comfortable folks who I see regularly in my golf groups and in my neighborhood and I love gathering them to feed them now and then and listening to what they have to say. I am seeing after five plus years here that people gather according to how comfortable they are with others views and that frequently means political views. This is the FIRST time that has happened in my life, because I never thought about politics, but now it seems to mean more, like a whole philosophy of living and we seek the comfortable acceptance of like minded people frequently at this age.

Age means less than anything in friends groups I have found and many like me kind of enjoy pulling their home and the people who live in it close around them and enjoy the serenity at the end of the day. I have partied with the best of them, enjoyed being young and lovely and alcohol fueled, but now not so much.

We are all different, but there are so many of us that we can find our comfortable group here.

[angel222]

Beautiful picture and thoughts from the heart....Thanks for sharing Gracie. Although I have never met you, your thoughts helped me immensely when I first arrived in TV. Always enjoy your comments!

[3puttharry]

I have only been here for 3 weeks but, for me, it would be "I miss what was and am not yet used to what is". I truly like TV but I can understand wanting to go back home. I think my roots will always be NY.

We love TV. Finally after three years as six month snow birds we got it right. Not to say this is for everyone but it definitely worked for us... Downsize up north and downsize in TV. 1100 sq ft, 2/2 up north and in TV. Two houses each with lower cost. Don't need a 2000 sq ft designer home with a 200 sq ft foyer for only six months a year. we feel we hv the best of both worlds now. MCO (orlando airport) an hour away with lots of less than $100.00 nonstop flights. Leave a car up north and a car here. Perfect for us. Oh and we kept our primary doctors up there too.

[3puttharry]

We have been here for six years now, and we are seriously considering leaving. Reasons for leaving:
1. TV has just gotten too big for it's own britches. The infrastructure is too small to handle the traffic.
2. Our lifestyles have changed. TV moves to a much more hastened pace. The people don't seem to be as friendly. The developer's presence is greatly felt more than ever before.
3. The last reason, I am a golfer. I am a priority member. We have eleven courses to play, and until three weeks ago, not one of them compared to a decent municipal course in Michigan. Anyone who has played off the reservation, knows what I mean. Until Golf management Solutions realizes that course conditions are more important than rounds being played, we will never have quality golf.

We will not be leaving north central Florida. We are just seeking a softer, hassle free environment.

I am and have been an avid golfer too. They better do something and I have no idea because I am not in the business. Concrete fairways, hard greens and sand traps machined every third or forth day... reconsidering value of priority membership. I hope decision makers in golf course management read TOTV. And no I have not called or written them... I they don't realize the poor conditions they shd not be in the business

[senior citizen]

................