View Full Version : Extrovert Or Introvert?
rubicon
07-23-2013, 07:46 AM
Are you an extrovert or introvert and how did it effect your life?
Microcodeboy
07-23-2013, 07:55 AM
Both. I was and am capable of being the extrovert, such as in business meetings, trips, etc. First to introduce, break ice, etc. Have done presentations to big audiences (yes, with Powerpoint slides). However, my comfort zone is when I am alone in my shop working on something. I have no end to the topics I am interested in and love to pursue them. Hate going out to a social event, always have a great time. So which am I?
champion6
07-23-2013, 08:01 AM
<kidding>
I'm a pervert. I was arrested, convicted and sentenced. There are five years I will never get back.:cryin2:
jblum315
07-23-2013, 08:52 AM
I guess I'm a divert. I try to divert attention away from myself
DianeM
07-23-2013, 08:57 AM
Definitely introverted by nature but can run meetings and events well when called to do so.
gomoho
07-23-2013, 09:00 AM
Both. I was and am capable of being the extrovert, such as in business meetings, trips, etc. First to introduce, break ice, etc. Have done presentations to big audiences (yes, with Powerpoint slides). However, my comfort zone is when I am alone in my shop working on something. I have no end to the topics I am interested in and love to pursue them. Hate going out to a social event, always have a great time. So which am I?
I can relate to that! Especially the "hate to go to a social event, always have a great time".
tucson
07-23-2013, 09:06 AM
Are you an extrovert or introvert and how did it effect your life?
Both, feel comfortable speaking in front of a audience and also a one on one conversation :-)
Polar Bear
07-23-2013, 09:09 AM
Love having friends and enjoy moderate amounts of socializing. But prefer event-type socializing (sports, games, etc.) to pure parties/social events type socializing. I'm definitely more introvert by nature.
janieb
07-23-2013, 09:10 AM
I guess I'm a divert. I try to divert attention away from myself
I think that describes me too, I think that I am mostly an introvert but can be sort of an extrovert if I need to be. I am not comfortable giving large presentations but I will be giving one next week remotely, interested to see how that goes:undecided:
lightworker888
07-23-2013, 09:24 AM
my DH did quite a bit of studying about the difference between the two types and he found out that an introvert expends energy around people and therefore needs to recharge with"alone" time. The extrovert needs people around to recharge and will seek out situations that will help him/her recharge. That can take many forms like telephoning, visiting, shopping etc. It puts the person in a situation of interaction with others.
You cannot really tell if someone is an introvert or extrovert just from their style of interaction with others. Some apparently outgoing joking personalities are often really introverts who retreat to their homes to recharge and are very quiet at home.
With most couples, there is often one of each so it becomes a balancing act. My DH can only take so much "outside" activity so I have learned to be OK with going out on my own to get myself recharged! It has taken a long time to really "get" that we are both OK, just different and to be able to support each others styles and to recognize my own need to care for myself. I think I tried to get him to be different so that I could get out enough! It is a blessing that he was interested in pursuing the research enough that we could both grow in our understanding and appreciation of our differences.
LW888
In awe of TV
07-23-2013, 09:48 AM
my DH did quite a bit of studying about the difference between the two types and he found out that an introvert expends energy around people and therefore needs to recharge with"alone" time. The extrovert needs people around to recharge and will seek out situations that will help him/her recharge. That can take many forms like telephoning, visiting, shopping etc. It puts the person in a situation of interaction with others.
I am basically an introvert and expend a lot of energy around people and I do need my alone time to recharge. Sometimes I take too much alone time and don't allow myself to get back into the swing of things. I definitely need to work on this.
Taltarzac725
07-23-2013, 09:49 AM
my DH did quite a bit of studying about the difference between the two types and he found out that an introvert expends energy around people and therefore needs to recharge with"alone" time. The extrovert needs people around to recharge and will seek out situations that will help him/her recharge. That can take many forms like telephoning, visiting, shopping etc. It puts the person in a situation of interaction with others.
You cannot really tell if someone is an introvert or extrovert just from their style of interaction with others. Some apparently outgoing joking personalities are often really introverts who retreat to their homes to recharge and are very quiet at home.
With most couples, there is often one of each so it becomes a balancing act. My DH can only take so much "outside" activity so I have learned to be OK with going out on my own to get myself recharged! It has taken a long time to really "get" that we are both OK, just different and to be able to support each others styles and to recognize my own need to care for myself. I think I tried to get him to be different so that I could get out enough! It is a blessing that he was interested in pursuing the research enough that we could both grow in our understanding and appreciation of our differences.
LW888
Interesting results on the study. I do feel like I need to recharge by interacting with other people but this is often via a computer, books, watching TV, grocery shopping. etc. I had to become outgoing to get my MA in Librarianship and certainly my JD (Law Degree) but still do not like public speaking. I avoided public speaking as much as possible while getting my BAs in History and Philosophy. A lot of the historical people I have studied are quite hard to pin down like Napoleon Bonaparte, Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill: while others more easily fit a stereotype of introvert or extrovert like Edgar Allen Poe (introvert) and Benjamin Franklin (extrovert).
skyguy79
07-23-2013, 10:19 AM
I'm too bashful to answer the question.
http://images.anagrammer.com/b/bashful/bashful-isna-t-bashful-scrabble.jpeg
Buffalo Jim
07-23-2013, 10:48 AM
Both. I was and am capable of being the extrovert, such as in business meetings, trips, etc. First to introduce, break ice, etc. Have done presentations to big audiences (yes, with Powerpoint slides). However, my comfort zone is when I am alone in my shop working on something. I have no end to the topics I am interested in and love to pursue them. Hate going out to a social event, always have a great time. So which am I?
THe above describes me perfectly . I never had any issue / anxiety giving presentations or just speaking off a few notes in front of a large gathering or our corporate Board . However following a major presentation when individuals would approach me for one on one conversation I could always feel myself pulling back !
I have to really force myself to seek out social situations . I am more than comfortable --- too comfortable -- being alone . I rarely if ever get bored with my own company because I have so many subjects which I am interested in learning more about .
All of the above considered spending an abundant amount of time alone is really NOT such a great idea . I have now lived here nearly 2 years and sadly have not met many people .
rubicon
07-23-2013, 12:43 PM
First let me apologize. I reread my OP and believe I should have written affect rather than effect.
Secondly based on the ease of answering we apparently all know ourselves quite well.
I too can be both extrovert and introvert but my default is to introvert. Like many of you my duties forced me to the former. Unlike some of you I loved public speaking. It is an important piece of my occupation that I miss.
My daughter knows me quite well and brought me a book concerning highly sensitive people. I explained that I was not that thin skinned. she agreed. The sensitive person in the book is about people who are overwhelmed by loud noise or crowded rooms. My daughter is right about me. While I can speak in front of huge crowds once I'm done I have to move out of the room...retreat to quiet so I can internalize recharge evaluate how I did and what I should do to improve.
I am guessing after reading the preceding posts that there are a lot of you like that too.
Clearly no one related an extrovert to that of a narcissist .
I love the story of the narcissistic talk show host. He speaking to his guest for about 15 minutes and its all about him. He stops suddenly as says enough about me" let's talk about you. The guest's body language signals he is ready for his first question. The talk host leans into the guest with his microphone and says to the guest "what to you think of me?"
ciao
PammyJ
07-23-2013, 04:51 PM
I hid behind my mother when I was a child. My parents encouraged me in social situations.
Still to this day, I am really uncomfortable making small talk. However, like many previous posters, I am in a job where I have to do this. Talking during presentations, I could do all day, and sometimes I do. One-on-one conversations are hard! I just hide behind my hubby now! LOL! Wine helps!!!!
Skip2MySue
07-23-2013, 05:34 PM
I always considered myself a fun person to be around and felt comfortable meeting and greeting new and old friends. Then my hearing started to go and with that I then proceeded to become introverted and dreaded gatherings because of my difficulty in hearing conversations. $5000 hearing aids later and I'm still struggling so I tend to avoid gatherings. I kept telling myself I wanted to attend the TOTV Crisper's gatherings but knew it would be disaster so instead I read about the good times everyone has meeting each other :(.
Skip 2
ugotme
07-23-2013, 05:41 PM
Hmmm. Let's see.
As a kid I was very shy! Even into my late teens I was an introvert.
But now . . .
LOOK OUT WORLD !
Can't tell you why but now I basically never shut up - I admit it.
However still quiet when I first meet people. HATE doing things like weddings etc. where I don't know anyone - but usually end up having a good time . . .
In spite of myself !
duffysmom
07-23-2013, 05:52 PM
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Powerful book and a great read, helps to understand ourselves as well
as our children and grand children.
Book Description
Publication Date:January 24, 2012
At least one-third of the people we know are introverts. They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking, reading to partying; who innovate and create but dislike self-promotion; who favor working on their own over brainstorming in teams. Although they are often labeled "quiet," it is to introverts that we owe many of the great contributions to society--from van Gogh’s sunflowers to the invention of the personal computer.
Passionately argued, impressively researched, and filled with indelible stories of real people, Quiet shows how dramatically we undervalue introverts, and how much we lose in doing so. Taking the reader on a journey from Dale Carnegie’s birthplace to Harvard Business School, from a Tony Robbins seminar to an evangelical megachurch, Susan Cain charts the rise of the Extrovert Ideal in the twentieth century and explores its far-reaching effects. She talks to Asian-American students who feel alienated from the brash, backslapping atmosphere of American schools. She questions the dominant values of American business culture, where forced collaboration can stand in the way of innovation, and where the leadership potential of introverts is often overlooked. And she draws on cutting-edge research in psychology and neuroscience to reveal the surprising differences between extroverts and introverts.
Perhaps most inspiring, she introduces us to successful introverts--from a witty, high-octane public speaker who recharges in solitude after his talks, to a record-breaking salesman who quietly taps into the power of questions. Finally, she offers invaluable advice on everything from how to better negotiate differences in introvert-extrovert relationships to how to empower an introverted child to when it makes sense to be a "pretend extrovert."
This extraordinary book has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and, equally important, how introverts see themselves.
Bill-n-Brillo
07-23-2013, 06:37 PM
Many people would consider me to be an extrovert. I am in many situations but in others, not so much. One business role in particular "in a prior life" demanded tons of contact with many people within the organization on a daily basis, public speaking and presentations, etc., etc. It forced me to become something that wasn't really all that natural for me. It worked out fine - most people never knew the difference. Now, as a result, I don't have any problems walking up to total strangers, introducing myself, and striking up a conversation. Many people feel like I have TOO much to say!!! :D
Speaking on Sandy's behalf - - - She was very introverted when we first met - extremely quiet, kept very much to herself, not much of one to go our of her way to meet people, etc. She used to shy away from attending any business functions with me as being around people she didn't know made her very uncomfortable.
Time.......and hanging around with me for 40 years!.......have made a difference. She's a completely different person now - talks much more easily with people, quiet a bit more outgoing, and so on. But again, like me, it didn't all come naturally. We're like a comedy tag-team now - always trying our best to have fun with whatever we're doing!
Bill :)
chachacha
07-23-2013, 06:49 PM
well according to lightworker's DH's research, i must be an introvert...i do need to recharge at home alone after having wonderful times in social situations. as a young person i was very quiet but around the age of 45 i came into my own and now am never uncomfortable in any social setting. i figure if someone does not like me, so be it. i cannot please everyone and don't try to! :)
Blessed2BNTV
07-23-2013, 06:56 PM
I always considered myself a fun person to be around and felt comfortable meeting and greeting new and old friends. Then my hearing started to go and with that I then proceeded to become introverted and dreaded gatherings because of my difficulty in hearing conversations. $5000 hearing aids later and I'm still struggling so I tend to avoid gatherings. I kept telling myself I wanted to attend the TOTV Crisper's gatherings but knew it would be disaster so instead I read about the good times everyone has meeting each other :(.
Skip 2
My hearing is not as good as it use to be. While we are only part time residents hope to go to Crispers meeting on one of our visits. We can go together.
ssmith
07-23-2013, 07:36 PM
iIam either an outgoing intravert or a quiet extravert.....
Ilove being around people and can get quite fired up about it ....
but I also love to be home and get rested too.
If I am home alone too long I have to go out around people and if I am on the go too much then I need to be home alone too.
I have lost the hearing in my left ear and I have tenitus so sometimes I get exhausted in group conversations esp when the person I am trying to converse with speaks in a quieter tone and then there will be a fun and boisterous conversation on the side of my good ear a few feet or across the room...then I can't hear a thing!!!
Lark7
07-23-2013, 08:36 PM
A bit of both - however, wish I were a tad more extroverted.
Microcodeboy
07-23-2013, 09:33 PM
OK. I was told to add some stuff:
While I was always nervous doing big presentations, I did them often. More, I love the unrehersed Q&A after. That was when I was most in my element. I spent most of my career understanding my shortcomings and attempting to improve. Now I accept that I am who I am and either you like me or not - so be it. Life is much more fun now.
The business world offered to analyze me and make perpetual suggestions for change. Glad that is done with.
Jim 9922
07-23-2013, 09:44 PM
As today's Wall Street Journal summarized Extroverts: talkative, enthusiastic, tendency to be assertive in group settings, are happier and motivated most of the time.
Thats me, maybe that's why my clients still pay the good bucks and won't let me retire!:thumbup:
cbg150
07-23-2013, 10:26 PM
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Powerful book and a great read, helps to understand ourselves as well
as our children and grand children.
Book Description
Publication Date:January 24, 2012
At least one-third of the people we know are introverts. They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking, reading to partying; who innovate and create but dislike self-promotion; who favor working on their own over brainstorming in teams. Although they are often labeled "quiet," it is to introverts that we owe many of the great contributions to society--from van Gogh’s sunflowers to the invention of the personal computer.
Passionately argued, impressively researched, and filled with indelible stories of real people, Quiet shows how dramatically we undervalue introverts, and how much we lose in doing so. Taking the reader on a journey from Dale Carnegie’s birthplace to Harvard Business School, from a Tony Robbins seminar to an evangelical megachurch, Susan Cain charts the rise of the Extrovert Ideal in the twentieth century and explores its far-reaching effects. She talks to Asian-American students who feel alienated from the brash, backslapping atmosphere of American schools. She questions the dominant values of American business culture, where forced collaboration can stand in the way of innovation, and where the leadership potential of introverts is often overlooked. And she draws on cutting-edge research in psychology and neuroscience to reveal the surprising differences between extroverts and introverts.
Perhaps most inspiring, she introduces us to successful introverts--from a witty, high-octane public speaker who recharges in solitude after his talks, to a record-breaking salesman who quietly taps into the power of questions. Finally, she offers invaluable advice on everything from how to better negotiate differences in introvert-extrovert relationships to how to empower an introverted child to when it makes sense to be a "pretend extrovert."
This extraordinary book has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and, equally important, how introverts see themselves.
I really loved this book too!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
perrjojo
07-24-2013, 03:20 PM
Are you an extrovert or introvert and how did it effect your life?
Ambivert.... I have lived a healthy happy life so I guess it has worked for me
rubicon
07-25-2013, 08:25 AM
Another interesting aspect to the question of extrovert or introvert is perception. By that I mean how you view yourself vis a vis to how others perceive you. Many posters answered both ways which I found interesting.
In the corporate world companies would spend vast sums of money and time to determine managerial styles. One such programs had the manager score him/herself the manager's subordinates and the manager's superiors. More often than not all agree to a degree. The key factor for me in such exercises is the default position of an individual, meaning that most of us will adapt to the changing environment in order to survive but we eventually default back to who we are.
I also believe that who we are is shaped by our parents (genetic taught values, etc) our education institutions and our cultural( neighborhood, etc)
I opine others can decide
Villages PL
07-25-2013, 06:48 PM
I...a....I'm not sure what to say at this point. I'll try again tomorrow.
Villages PL
07-26-2013, 03:21 PM
I...a....I'm not sure what to say at this point. I'll try again tomorrow.
I'm not strictly an introvert, nor am I strictly an extrovert. I'm a combination of the two. I'm a Combovert. Remember: "All things in moderation." :thumbup: This way I have the best of both worlds.
When I'm home I cherish my solitude but there are times when I like to get out and socialize. When I'm on the computer, I wear my extrovert hat.
Combovert: I think I just coined a new term.....:icon_wink:
CaptJohn
07-30-2013, 10:09 AM
I'm not strictly an introvert, nor am I strictly an extrovert. I'm a combination of the two. I'm a Combovert. Remember: "All things in moderation." :thumbup: This way I have the best of both worlds.
When I'm home I cherish my solitude but there are times when I like to get out and socialize. When I'm on the computer, I wear my extrovert hat.
Combovert: I think I just coined a new term.....:icon_wink:
I like this answer, so today I'm a combovert! Will have to wait until tomorrow to see what my personality then is. :laugh:
I was taught the moderation thing. It's worked pretty well over the years.
Yorio
07-30-2013, 02:40 PM
I am definitely an introvert as I came across a Myers-Briggs test I took back in '94. It says I am INTJ(Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging). Am told INTJ personalities are quite few in the U.S. Famous people with these characteristics are Gustav Jung, George C. Marshall, Van Gogh, Yoda, Rasputin, Diego Riviera, Willis Harman, Carlos Castaneda. Introvert with a touch of nut case?
lightworker888
07-31-2013, 09:23 AM
Just came across this and thought I'd share. It really spells out the true meaning of Introvert which often seems to be more about quiet vs animated. I found it very clear and yup the DH is definitely an introvert.
10 Myths About Introverts | CarlKingdom.com :: Writer. Director. Artist. (http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts)
LW888
duffysmom
07-31-2013, 11:04 AM
Thank you Lightworker. I identify strongly with the article you posted and especially enjoyed the Q&A at the bottom of the page. It shows the bias people have towards introverts.
CaptJohn
07-31-2013, 11:41 AM
Just came across this and thought I'd share. It really spells out the true meaning of Introvert which often seems to be more about quiet vs animated. I found it very clear and yup the DH is definitely an introvert.
10 Myths About Introverts | CarlKingdom.com :: Writer. Director. Artist. (http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts)
LW888
Thanks for posting the link. Very interesting. I think I'll be an introvert for the day. :laugh:
Halibut
07-31-2013, 12:12 PM
If interested, here's an online personality questionnaire (http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/mmdi/questionnaire/) that uses the same codes as Meyers-Briggs.
ISFJs unite! :laugh:
Villages PL
08-01-2013, 05:23 PM
Just came across this and thought I'd share. It really spells out the true meaning of Introvert which often seems to be more about quiet vs animated. I found it very clear and yup the DH is definitely an introvert.
10 Myths About Introverts | CarlKingdom.com :: Writer. Director. Artist. (http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts)
LW888
That was very good and I identified with most of it. Now I know why I get bored so quickly with most clubs and sports that I join in the villages. I often say, "wow, here's a club or sport I will really like", and after I go once, I don't feel the need to go any more. It even happens with health clubs, and I really like the subject of health and nutrition. But I often feel I can gain more knowledge and enjoyment by reading a health/nutrition/science book at home.
Also, I don't follow the crowd, I love science, and I would rather have one or two good friends than lots of friends.
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