Death with dignity

[Golfingnut]

Reading material.... Euthanasia suicide mercy-killing right-to-die physician assisted suicide living wills research (http://euthanasia.com/)

I visited my father in a full care nursing/hospas home where he hung on for seven years. He had a massive stroke leaving him in a vegetative state. The SYSTEM slowly drained away all the income saved over 50 years. Our mother refused to allow us kids to help finanualy and due to taxes and upkeep cost lost her home. After years, she ended up in public housing, broke and alone. I ask that I be allowed to have control of my destiny. What I do not want is:

1. Suffer after any decent quality of life is gone.
2. Have all I have worked my life for be taken from me for care I do not want.
3. YOU, THEY, THEM taking control of my end of life decision.

Some will say if I wish to end my life, I am depressed. BS. I could type pages of justification why assisted death would be the right thing for me.

We all get on our soap box for freedom of speech, right to bear arms, religion and so many other issues. Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

[Schaumburger]

Unfortunately my mother starting developing systems of dementia a few months after her 64th birthday. She was also on kidney dialysis for the last three years of her life. The last three years it just seemed like she was declining slowly, sometimes quickly. She had pretty bad stroke about 4 days before she died at the age of 67. Those years were not easy on my dad, who was my mom's primary caregiver. God bless the two ladies from the Visiting Nurse Association who came to stay with my mom several hours a week during those years so my dad could get out of the house. And bless my sister Karen, who came to my parents' house almost every Sunday morning to stay with my mom so that my dad could go to church.

I have a friend whose father died very unexpectedly and quickly of a massive heart attack about 18 years ago at the age of 70. The heart attack happened when he working at his part time job that he took after retirement. He was gone before the ambulance arrived at his workplace. The death was a shock to the family, but at least he went quickly. I don't know which way is better -- 3 years of gradual decline like my mom or going fast like my friend's dad?

With my dad being 83 but in pretty good health, I count my blessings. I have had a couple of coworkers tell me that my dad at his age should set up a medical power of attorney. Maybe they are right.

[Madelaine Amee]

Reading material.... Euthanasia suicide mercy-killing right-to-die physician assisted suicide living wills research (http://euthanasia.com/)

I visited my father in a full care nursing/hospas home where he hung on for seven years. He had a massive stroke leaving him in a vegetative state. The SYSTEM slowly drained away all the income saved over 50 years. Our mother refused to allow us kids to help finanualy and due to taxes and upkeep cost lost her home. After years, she ended up in public housing, broke and alone. I ask that I be allowed to have control of my destiny. What I do not want is:

1. Suffer after any decent quality of life is gone.
2. Have all I have worked my life for be taken from me for care I do not want.
3. YOU, THEY, THEM taking control of my end of life decision.

Some will say if I wish to end my life, I am depressed. BS. I could type pages of justification why assisted death would be the right thing for me.

We all get on our soap box for freedom of speech, right to bear arms, religion and so many other issues. Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

Medically assisted suicide is legal in several European countries, Belgium, the Netherlands, Luxembourg and Switzerland. It is highly regulated and, I believe, happens in a regular hospital with constant medical supervision. If a person in this country really feels this is their only way to get relief from unbearable pain and suffering, it is an alternative.

This is an interesting link to assisted suicide in Vermont: JURIST - Paper Chase: Vermont governor signs physician-assisted suicide bill (http://jurist.org/paperchase/2013/05/vermont-governor-signs-physician-assisted-suicide-bill.php)

[rubicon]

Statistically speaking it has been reported that many people spend more for medical care in the last two years of their lives.

I have a medical directive not to prolong my life unnecessarily. This issue is very complex highly emotional and not many spouses want to be left with the decision

[salpal]

Golfingut: Totally agree with you. However, this will be one of those issues like abortion, with extremists on either side. If I feel the need to end my life due to illness, I will book a trip to The Netherlands, where it is legal.

[asianthree]

Dr K did a very caring dignity with death...but it got him jail time

[Schaumburger]

Statistically speaking it has been reported that many people spend more for medical care in the last two years of their lives.

I have a medical directive not to prolong my life unnecessarily. This issue is very complex highly emotional and not many spouses want to be left with the decision

During the last year of my mom's life, one of the people at the dialysis center told my dad that if he stopped my mom's dialysis, that would be an alternative. I was rather taken aback that a dialysis center staff member would suggest that. My father didn't take that route as he could not have lived with himself. I agree that this is a very complex and emotional issue.

[teachnmo]

My father passed away from Pancreatic Cancer in 1988 at the age of 64. My mother passed away from colon, lung, and eventually brain cancer at the age of 80 in 2010. I truly feel it was all of the chemicals used on our farm for crops.

My mother-in-law passed away at the age of 92 after spending five years in a nursing home. Initially it was from falling off a ladder while cleaning out her gutters. She was near death four times, but like a cat with nine lives kept fighting to live. Her mind was good, but her body was in very poor shape. She hated every minute of being in the nursing home, even though my husband would stop and see her every day after work.

My daughter is a nurse on an oncology ward. She says very few patients have DNR orders or living wills that will allow them to leave this earth gracefully.

It is a matter of personal opinion. I don't want to be kept alive with life support if I get to that point in life. I want to have a gathering of my family and friends, celebrate my life, and be allowed to exit without long months or years of pain and suffering. No funeral for me please.

As I said, it is just my two cents. The beauty is that we all don't have to think alike in order to exist in this world.

[stroglass]

As a Nurse I have seen so many people be placed on life support because they did not make their wishes known with the power of attorney to back it up. I have seen family members torn apart by having to make this decision for some one they love. My parents blesses me by having all this in order before they became ill.I have done the same for my daughter as has my husband for me. Death is a part of life it should be prepared for like all other phases

[Madelaine Amee]

.. and, in my opinion, the most important thing of all is to be an organ donor. I would love to think my parts are helping someone to live a more comfortable life.

There is a young man who works in TV who is waiting for a liver transplant .... he has young children ...... be a donor.

[Golfingnut]

.. and, in my opinion, the most important thing of all is to be an organ donor. I would love to think my parts are helping someone to live a more comfortable life.

There is a young man who works in TV who is waiting for a liver transplant .... he has young children ...... be a donor.

We both are donors and hope we have a part or two left that is still OK to use.

[jblum315]

Everyone, regardless of age, should have a Living Will that says what you want to be done if you are incapacitated. Whether it includes DNR is up to you Don't leave this difficult decision up to your spouse or your children.

[donb9006]

Reading material.... Euthanasia suicide mercy-killing right-to-die physician assisted suicide living wills research (http://euthanasia.com/)

I visited my father in a full care nursing/hospas home where he hung on for seven years. He had a massive stroke leaving him in a vegetative state. The SYSTEM slowly drained away all the income saved over 50 years. Our mother refused to allow us kids to help finanualy and due to taxes and upkeep cost lost her home. After years, she ended up in public housing, broke and alone. I ask that I be allowed to have control of my destiny. What I do not want is:

1. Suffer after any decent quality of life is gone.
2. Have all I have worked my life for be taken from me for care I do not want.
3. YOU, THEY, THEM taking control of my end of life decision.

Some will say if I wish to end my life, I am depressed. BS. I could type pages of justification why assisted death would be the right thing for me.

We all get on our soap box for freedom of speech, right to bear arms, religion and so many other issues. Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

You answered your own question...the system is DESIGNED to suck away all your savings.

[KeepingItReal]

R
Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

The decision has not been taken away as it cannot be but, it could be made a lot more humane.

[Bizdoc]

Both of my parents have advance medical directives and medical power of attorney. On two different occasions I have had "the talk" with my mom's physician. I explained her wishes and that she (and my dad and I) did not want any heroics. In both cases, the doctors were grateful that the parameters were clearly defined. Same thing last summer when DW was in a coma and in ICU.

One critical things to have a copy of the directives and POA. Hospitals can't/wont take your word. I keep copies of advance medical directives, POA and financial POA in pdf format on my cell phone. I can email it to the hospital folks while standing there. Also great because I always have the phone with me.

[BarryRX]

The decision has not been taken away as it cannot be but, it could be made a lot more humane.
Your screen name is well chosen. You are absolutely right. Although, there are those who, because of their illness or accident, cannot act for themselves.

[Villages PL]

During the last year of my mom's life, one of the people at the dialysis center told my dad that if he stopped my mom's dialysis, that would be an alternative. I was rather taken aback that a dialysis center staff member would suggest that. My father didn't take that route as he could not have lived with himself. I agree that this is a very complex and emotional issue.

I believe that information by the staff member was wrong. It would never be the decision of a spouse. The decision would be with the person receiving the dialysis. There was an article about this in The Wall Street Journal several years ago. It said that it's not uncommon for elderly people to eventually stop their dialysis.

My aunt stopped her dialysis after she was told that her brain cancer came back and was inoperable.

[asianthree]

making your wishes known and in writing...does not mean the family will be happy with your wishes

[Cantwaittoarrive]

Reading material.... Euthanasia suicide mercy-killing right-to-die physician assisted suicide living wills research (http://euthanasia.com/)

I visited my father in a full care nursing/hospas home where he hung on for seven years. He had a massive stroke leaving him in a vegetative state. The SYSTEM slowly drained away all the income saved over 50 years. Our mother refused to allow us kids to help finanualy and due to taxes and upkeep cost lost her home. After years, she ended up in public housing, broke and alone. I ask that I be allowed to have control of my destiny. What I do not want is:

1. Suffer after any decent quality of life is gone.
2. Have all I have worked my life for be taken from me for care I do not want.
3. YOU, THEY, THEM taking control of my end of life decision.

Some will say if I wish to end my life, I am depressed. BS. I could type pages of justification why assisted death would be the right thing for me.

We all get on our soap box for freedom of speech, right to bear arms, religion and so many other issues. Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

I will let God decide when I die. Life is short, eternity is forever!

[Duvalboomer]

I will let God decide when I die. Life is short, eternity is forever!

:BigApplause::BigApplause:

[Villages PL]

Reading material.... Euthanasia suicide mercy-killing right-to-die physician assisted suicide living wills research (http://euthanasia.com/)

I visited my father in a full care nursing/hospas home where he hung on for seven years. He had a massive stroke leaving him in a vegetative state. The SYSTEM slowly drained away all the income saved over 50 years. Our mother refused to allow us kids to help finanualy and due to taxes and upkeep cost lost her home. After years, she ended up in public housing, broke and alone. I ask that I be allowed to have control of my destiny. What I do not want is:

1. Suffer after any decent quality of life is gone.
2. Have all I have worked my life for be taken from me for care I do not want.
3. YOU, THEY, THEM taking control of my end of life decision.

Some will say if I wish to end my life, I am depressed. BS. I could type pages of justification why assisted death would be the right thing for me.

We all get on our soap box for freedom of speech, right to bear arms, religion and so many other issues. Yet freedom for end of life decision, that for me is the most personal decision of all, is taken away from us. How sad is that.

In another thread, I may have given the impression that I'm against it. Well, I'm not. I think there can be a place for it under the right circumstances.