How did We/ I get to be alone on Holidays?

[kittygilchrist]

this thread for those of us without a plan for holidays.
If you would like company, anyone on totv may respond with invitations.
It might be helpful to know what your situation is like re: when you are available, religious expectations, personal requirements.
My situation is that I am new here and single with not much family...the single community has an event for turkey day, and welcomes anyone who wants company.
Kitty

[2BNTV]

this thread for those of us without a plan for holidays.
If you would like company, anyone on totv may respond with invitations.
It might be helpful to know what your situation is like re: when you are available, religious expectations, personal requirements.
My situation is that I am new here and single with not much family...the single community has an event for turkey day, and welcomes anyone who wants company.
Kitty

Thanksgiving at Larry's. See you there. :smiley:

I am probably going to my son's house for Xmas, so I can see all the presents that Santa brought for my grand-daughter. Holidays are for families so it's tough to be single with not anywhere to go, especially if family is far away.

I can empathize with you.

[lhasalady]

I'm feeling kind of sad about the Holidays too. I am closing on my home up north on Fri. and don't close on my new home in TV until Dec. 2. The movers came today and loaded up my belongings. So here I sit in an empty house knowing that I have to be out of here in a couple of days. In between closings I will be staying with my girlfriend and her family and will have Thanksgiving with them before driving to Florida. Even my little dogs will be in the kennel until then. I don't want to leave them there but my friend has 3 big dogs of her own. I feel out of place, lonely and scared.

I used to love the holidays but now that my husband has passed away I really don't care about them. At least my daughter, who lives in another state, will be with me for Christmas when I move to TV.

I really can't wait to be settled in my new home and I am super excited about TV but right now I feel kind of homeless.

This will pass. Its sure been a tough year, though.

[In awe of TV]

Kitty, I'm in the same boat. This will be the first Christmas in 10 years where I'll be finding myself alone and it's making me feel sad. My kids are scattered on each coast and I have no other family. I usually spend Christmas with my daughter somewhere tropical, but this year it's not in the cards. No plan for this year, it will just be me and my little doggie.

[Bonnevie]

as a single mother whose son had to split Christmas holidays with his father, I got used to being alone years ago. As such, I was happy when the holiday season was over. Being in health care, I would always volunteer to work those holidays. This year my son should be around for both holidays....next year, who knows...I'll probably be back to looking forward to the holidays ending or perhaps next year I'll try to find some way to volunteer for something....but my dogs will keep me company no matter what.

[kittygilchrist]

I'm feeling kind of sad about the Holidays too. I am closing on my home up north on Fri. and don't close on my new home in TV until Dec. 2. The movers came today and loaded up my belongings. So here I sit in an empty house knowing that I have to be out of here in a couple of days. In between closings I will be staying with my girlfriend and her family and will have Thanksgiving with them before driving to Florida. Even my little dogs will be in the kennel until then. I don't want to leave them there but my friend has 3 big dogs of her own. I feel out of place, lonely and scared.

I used to love the holidays but now that my husband has passed away I really don't care about them. At least my daughter, who lives in another state, will be with me for Christmas when I move to TV.

I really can't wait to be settled in my new home and I am super excited about TV but right now I feel kind of homeless.

This will pass. Its sure been a tough year, though.

transitions like this are so difficult. I want you to know that you can make new friends quickly who care deeply. Moving was extremely difficult for me for reasons hard to articulate while yours are obvious. scattering the puppies, the belongings, where your pillow is, and having lost your love. oh my.
Take heart, there is a caring community here...
Kitty

[kittygilchrist]

as a single mother whose son had to split Christmas holidays with his father, I got used to being alone years ago. As such, I was happy when the holiday season was over. Being in health care, I would always volunteer to work those holidays. This year my son should be around for both holidays....next year, who knows...I'll probably be back to looking forward to the holidays ending or perhaps next year I'll try to find some way to volunteer for something....but my dogs will keep me company no matter what.

oK, Jackie, however you spell it, you are going to be so popular I doubt you will spend a future holiday season wondering what to do. Happy for you that your son is demanding you this year. too bad, I would have conscripted you to host a single party.
hey why don't you do that? have a singles Christmas party?
really, totally want to come do that at your place...(after 12/12, selfishly.)
Kitty

[kittygilchrist]

Kitty, I'm in the same boat. This will be the first Christmas in 10 years where I'll be finding myself alone and it's making me feel sad. My kids are scattered on each coast and I have no other family. I usually spend Christmas with my daughter somewhere tropical, but this year it's not in the cards. No plan for this year, it will just be me and my little doggie.

So do you live in TV? If you do, you won't be spending the holiday alone, promise.
K.

[DianeM]

Families change and so do our holidays. Some years they are jubilant and other years they suck. Unfortunately, that is the cycle of life. When alone, try to plan something nice for yourself - even if it's a day in jammies with the remote and stupid movies. The specific holiday - Thanksgiving/Chanukah/Christmas/New Year's are just squares on a calendar some years and when we cross that day off, the next day starts. If you need to have a good cry for yourself, that's ok - it's your right to feel the way you feel.

[kittygilchrist]

Families change and so do our holidays. Some years they are jubilant and other years they suck. Unfortunately, that is the cycle of life. When alone, try to plan something nice for yourself - even if it's a day in jammies with the remote and stupid movies. The specific holiday - Thanksgiving/Chanukah/Christmas/New Year's are just squares on a calendar some years and when we cross that day off, the next day starts. If you need to have a good cry for yourself, that's ok - it's your right to feel the way you feel.

I love your post, Diane. I do jammies under the comforter, with and without furry friends, about every night! mostly football...but stupid movies are good too.

[Steve & Deanna]

It's so sad to hear of people alone during upcoming Holidays. My wife and I (almost 47 years) talk about that occasionally and I think either one of us would be devastated whenever that will happen. Hopefully, you can find some peace and good times with either family or friends or at Church events. We wish you all the best.

[DianeM]

I love your post, Diane. I do jammies under the comforter, with and without furry friends, about every night! mostly football...but stupid movies are good too.

Sometimes you need to watch the sappy Lifetime ones too.

[DianeM]

You know .... sometimes being by oneself is not the worst thing on the planet. We all have the Norman Rockwell picture of holidays in our mindset but, let's be honest, that's not reality. Sometimes it's okay not to pretend to be into it.

[manaboutown]

For several years I went on singles trips over the holidays. Some of those trips resulted in some of the the most memorable experiences of my life. I retain some friends from those trips all around the USA, a couple of Canadians and an Australian.

[DianeM]

For several years I went on singles trips over the holidays. Some of those trips resulted in some of the the most memorable experiences of my life. I retain some friends from those trips all around the USA, a couple of Canadians and an Australian.

That's awesome. I've thought of that myself and never had the guts to do it.

[mfp509]

I put a post awhile back suggesting that anyone who finds themselves alone for Thanksgiving could meet me at Golden Corral but didn't really get any definite responses. At least there are no reservations required and the cost would be reasonable. The other suggestion would be to make reservations at some restaurant around here, but it would have to be done soon. PM me if you are interested.

[kittygilchrist]

mfp I pm'd you about a turkey day singles event. How I got to not much family for holidays is I have only one childless brother and only one childless son and the rest of the extended and wonderful family are in Tennessee. pls see threads on the singles forum for holiday home party invites. we are a loving and connected group and nobody I have gotten to know is shallow or mean and all of us know that we need each other.

[MajorBill]

kittygilchrist and all: Being alone or being lonely is under our control. As a 'non-custodial parent' I had to deal with the heartaches and questions that came with the judge's decision. My therapist gets the credit for having me focus not on what I missed, but what I have. Over the nearly 30 years I have taken those 'potentially lonely' holidays and made them special with new friends, new traditions and -- most importantly -- new traditions.

That being said, I'll host 4 singles for Thanksgiving at my Buttonwood home.

[kittygilchrist]

Bill, thank you for your gracious invitation! The singles have a party going already if you want to attend that, but no one has offered a December holiday party yet. I love everything you said..especially the way you say...new traditions!

[In awe of TV]

All really great heartfelt responses here. Diane - words of wisdom. I know for me I'm very grateful and blessed for the wonderful holidays I've had with my family. This just happens to be an odd year in so many ways, next year I will plan better.

I have my Hallmark movies lined up and will no doubt find some project to occupy me. And, there is always a volunteer option that I just may take advantage of.

Skyping with my kids and grand daughter will be the highlight of the day for sure.

I am very blessed and thankful to be healthy and where I am in this point of my life. Life could always be so much worse.

Blessings to all.

[DianeM]

All really great heartfelt responses here. Diane - words of wisdom. I know for me I'm very grateful and blessed for the wonderful holidays I've had with my family. This just happens to be an odd year in so many ways, next year I will plan better.

I have my Hallmark movies lined up and will no doubt find some project to occupy me. And, there is always a volunteer option that I just may take advantage of.

Skyping with my kids and grand daughter will be the highlight of the day for sure.

I am very blessed and thankful to be healthy and where I am in this point of my life. Life could always be so much worse.

Blessings to all.

I'm glad you could relate to my comments. You can do this !! The remote and a Hallmark movie and a project - sounds like a pleasant way to spend the day. Skyping is awesome. Enjoy.

[mfp509]

I'm glad to see that some people don't mind being alone on holidays. I feel misunderstood about this at times. I don't care for large gatherings - I would like to go to a restaurant for a turkey dinner and that's it. Then I enjoy walking around KMart and WalMart - taking my dog for a golf cart ride and a longer walk than usual and also maybe to a different area. I belong to a singles club, get invited to friends, could go to my family's in North Palm Beach but I do all that at Christmas. So I prefer a quiet Thanksgiving - but I am available to go to a restaurant if anyone feels the same way. I am very thankful that I live in a place where I am never lonely - it doesn't get any better.

[senior citizen]

............

[misky]

this thread for those of us without a plan for holidays.
If you would like company, anyone on totv may respond with invitations.
It might be helpful to know what your situation is like re: when you are available, religious expectations, personal requirements.
My situation is that I am new here and single with not much family...the single community has an event for turkey day, and welcomes anyone who wants company.
Kitty

Kitty,

Great post that got me thinking. This year I am fortunate to be back in RI with my son and small family for the holidays. But, I have been alone during past holidays. When that happened, I did something that made me feel good like going for a long walk with my favorite tunes on my IPod or going for a bike ride. Now that I'm in TV, I know in the future I won't have to be alone with such a caring singles community.

Go Gators!

[Foruhun]

Hi
I'm married to a great guy that sees his elderly mother over the holidays (this year from 12-24 to 12-30). I usually go but not this year - been there, done that and it's no fun for me. I'd love to get together with others who are alone (and I love doggies). Maybe we could see movies, go out to dinner, tour houses together? Count me in. Let's all be alone - together!