Just curious, if you’re so worried about your assets, why get married in the first place? There is no law that you must get married. Just keep your assets and enjoy other people’s company when they let you. I also can’t understand why some people marry for housekeeping, laundry, cooking. Why not just hire people to do that?
My husband was my friend for 17 years before we married. We think we know each other enough to trust each other and we selected to be each other’s family. I am certain that as he has done when his mother passed, that he will carry out my wishes after I die even better than I would have.

Boomer and Mr. Boomer do not have a prenup.

When Boomer met Mr. Boomer, he was Sgt. Boomer.

Nixon had signed the treaty and Sgt. Boomer was back from Okinawa. That's when he found Boomer. The GI Bill was what led him to where his path crossed Boomer's path.

Boomer thought that Sgt. Boomer just might be rich. (although she did not care about that) The reason she thought he might be rich was because Sgt. Boomer had 4 huge Pioneer speakers, and everything to go with those speakers, to better blast Hendrix, The Doors, and for those really romantic evenings, "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida."

And Sgt. Boomer also had a Seiko watch.

Although Boomer thought that Sgt. Boomer just might be rich (although she did not care about that) she was somewhat confused by the '64 Plymouth Fury.

Boomer at the time had a Triumph GT6 and a car payment.

And then Sgt. Boomer, in his '64 Plymouth Fury, caught Boomer in her Triumph GT6.

And they did not have a prenup. And they still have each other.

But that does not mean that Boomer cannot have strong opinions on the need for prenups in so many circumstances for so many.

Boomer

I'm not sure what you mean by the debt going to the grave. If your husband had an estate and personal assets, his creditors can collect his debt from assets in the estate. It is true that, if he has no assets, the creditors cannot collect debts from another person.

As I understand it in most community property states what one owns prior to a marriage remains separate property unless it is "commingled" with marital property at which point it may become a marital asset and therefore community property.

Florida is an equitable distribution state which apparently yields substantially comparable results in a divorce to those achieved in a community property state. Interesting...

Divorce Attorneys & Commingling of Marital Assets

As will I. Prenups are not guaranteed and can be broken, especially if big bucks are involved.

Ways to Break a Prenuptial Agreement in California -

Regarding living together I have two words. Lee Marvin.

The Marvin V. Marvin "Palimony" Suit: 1979 | Encyclopedia.com

I shall stick with the admonishment to "Live close by, visit often." as it has worked very well for me for 26 years.

Also for men: Get a vasectomy unless you want to risk starting another family!

A whole lot of great advice, ideas, history, etc. in the previous posts.

The way I see it is if I don't trust you enough to marry you without a prenup then I shouldn't be marrying that particular woman at all. Old School I guess. Foolish you think? Not for me! I hope you all pick out a way that works for you and yours. Best of Luck!

Few people need to consider a prenup on a first marriage when they are young and have few if any assets. I certainly did not! There are of course exceptions usually related to significant and certainly vast family wealth on one or both sides of a marital union.

My above remarks are primarily addressed to folks who have substantial assets and children from previous marriages, perhaps nieces and nephews and siblings they wish to leave money. I have seen wealth it has taken a lifetime of hard work, sacrifice, deferred gratification and savings to accumulate go to the issue and relatives of a new spouse rather than to the issue and relatives of the asset acquirer after a marriage of only a few years. I would hope that those who remarry trust their new spouse. The problem arises after the death of a spouse when the surviving new spouse leaves whatever estate her/his new spouse left to her/him to her/his issue and blood relatives leaving the issue and blood relatives of the first to die spouse who worked to accumulate the assets with literally nothing.

When first getting married, while young with little or no assets...it's not really an issue.

It's pretty much been acknowledged by most courts however, that both spouses in long term marriages contributed (in some form)...to any later wealth and assets.

If the couple later builds wealth, even if it is only one of the spouses who was primarily responsible for it, you can bet the other spouse almost always contributed with those things (child rearing, home management, attending important functions, Etc., Etc.)...that made it possible for the other spouse to succeed.

It's when second (or subsequent) marriage(s) enter the picture and assets/wealth already exists...is when it can get complicated & sticky.


"Love conquers all... except when it comes to money."

Then the prevailing motto becomes..."A good attorney...conquers all." :1rotfl:


A good friend (a very expensive attorney), once told me that his favorite (and most profitable) clients during divorces without prenups (particularly if it's not the first one), were the ones who insisted that "It's not about the money...it's the principle."

Followed with his personal observation that..."It IS usually about the money." :D

Do ya think Jeff Bezos wishes he had a prenup

Why would he?

They were married for 25 years (with 4 children), which was LONG before the majority...of THEIR (see my post above) wealth was accumulated.

And everything I've seen, even HE doesn't have a problem with the settlement, so why in the world...should anyone else? :oops:

Bezos Divorce

Married again at 55. I insisted on a prenup. She has far more assets than I do. Couple reasons I insisted on one. I needed her to know that I don’t need nor do I care about her money. I have my own and I’m fine with what I have. And gave all the kids some peace of mind.

I agree with others here. If something were to happen between us I don’t see myself walking down the aisle again.

Some of you picked up on the idea of "Live Close By, Visit Often" -- the song by K. T. Oslin that I referred to in my first post in this thread.
K. T. Oslin wrote and recorded "80's Ladies" which is probably familiar. She is now 78, looking back on a career of some liberating lyrics that were often a whole lot of fun. She wrote from the angle of a well-seasoned woman -- even titled one of her albums "Songs from an Aging Sex Bomb."

I listened to a lot of country-western music back in the 90's. I like C-W songs because they tell a story.

I am now linking "Live Close By, Visit Often" here for you, BUT, with a disclaimer: This link is from youtube and as we all know youtube gloms ads onto the beginning of every video and those ads change every time AND you usually can skip them. I have no control over what ad will pop up before this song. You could get a political ad or an underwear ad or some scary ad from the pharmaceutical industry. If you do not like the ad, do not blame me, just skip it and move on to the song.

If you listen to these lyrics and this beat, you should find yourself smiling and maybe even bopping around a little. We could use some smiles around this joint lately. :)

Here you have it, "Live Close By, Visit Often" by K. T. Oslin:

Live Close By, Visit Often - YouTube

Thanks. Never heard this song before nor had I ever heard of this artist.

That’s not correct. I’m married only once. The first two were internships, apprenticeships or just practice.