Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 1660447)

Originally Posted by Jazuela (Post 1660457)

Pretty much this. People are looking for reasons to feel wronged, so they can vent their righteous indignation. If everything is going fine, they can't be righteously indignant. They have nothing to be "righteous' about, so they come up with perceived slights and call them grave injustices against [insert category here].

In the case of men plowing through and women stepping aside, honestly? It's nothing new. If you're just now figuring it out, you're either 7, or you've spent your entire life privileged and are now for the first time realizing that you're no better than anyone else.

Men - GENERALLY SPEAKING have domineered since always. Why? Because they're bigger. Because they CAN. It's biology. On the other hand, if you ever see a big burly beefy confident gal being domineered by a scrawny short geeky guy, take pictures and send it to NBC, because I promise you it'll be news.

Also there is such a thing as a chivalrous man. They still exist, they've always existed, and they will always exist. Try hanging out with a few and perhaps your perception of men will change.

Originally Posted by Jazuela (Post 1660470)

Oh I realize you knew all that Boomer! I was agreeing with your post AND adding comments about other posts by other people in the thread, to support my opinion.

Originally Posted by Madelaine Amee (Post 1660291)

Unfortunately, you are correct. I think the women born before the boomers were brought up to be subservient to men in every way. I have a neighbor and a friend who is a new widow who have both told me they had to have the meal on the table when the man got home, the children had to be her responsibility and out of the way until he had eaten, the women could only do menial task jobs outside the home (nothing professional) and tend to their homes and their family. So it is probably very difficult for these much older men to get it through their head that times have changed. I now know women who are the breadwinners and the husband is the house husband who takes care of the home and the children. Unfortunately, I think we have to wait for the older generation of men to die off before much changes.

In my home things were so very different. My Mother was a college educated women with a degree, my Father was an Engineer. She worked for as long as I can remember, he had his own business. I adored my Father who was so proud of us all and I married a man very much like my Father in his thinking. I take care of my husband because I WANT to, not because it is expected of me and my husband treats me the same way.

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 1660461)

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Of course I know that, Jazuela, I am married to one of the good guys.

My observation that you quoted was about the way things seem to be shaking out around us in the general population. Too much scowling.

My dad was a good guy, too.

I cannot imagine putting up with any other kind.


When my daughter was a teenager, she had to listen to my motherly words of wisdom about the male of the species. (I always treated her to my little talks while I was driving down the interstate at 70mph with her in the passenger seat.)

Here are a few quotes from those talks -- not actually talks -- just me talking while she rolled her eyes:

"Boomette, never forget that there is nothing more dangerous than an insecure male."

"Boomette, don't you ever settle."

"Boomette, get your education and be able to earn money on your own."

"Boomette, do not even think about some loser who is oh so misunderstood and tell yourself that he "needs" you to fix him. And I don't care how cute he is."

"Boomette, are they still using the line, "You would if you loved me"?

"Boomette, never, ever "loan" a guy money."

(Anyway, Boomette turned out just fine. I knew she was just pretending she was not listening to me.) :)

I am sure there were more things I said, but for now I have some paperwork that I am avoiding by writing posts on TOTV. I bet others can add to this with advice they gave to their daughters.

-- And, yes, this is the Feminine Forum. The long thread "Girl Talk" here started more than a decade ago by Barefoot. The reason it began was to allow a conversation that moved from topic to topic easily and freely like when women are together -- and as we know, we as women can follow it all with no complaints about jumping off topic. If you look at Page 1 of "Girl Talk", you will see how it was off and running from the start. (I think at the time, some of the guys tried to start their own forum but it fizzled.)


(Oh but wait! I also give advice to women who find themselves back in the dating world. "You can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats the server.")

Boomer