[K9-Lovers]

Today, this email landed in my in-box. It was sent by a health-food company from which I buy products. Boy, did this guy go over-board or what?

While it may be true, the wording was so adamant that I started to laugh. Maybe you'll get a laugh from it, too.

Hello My Friend!

It's time to celebrate another beautiful holiday that has become a commercialized nightmare. Cupid draws his arrow and aims at a loving couple. The lover adores his partner, so in a strange show of affection, he or she purchases a big fat box of chocolates and presents this to the love of their life. Has this person lost his or her mind? If you love someone dearly, why would you give that person candy? Candy rots teeth. Candy can cause nasty mood swings. Candy can cause type 2 diabetes. Candy can cause acne. Candy is addictive. Candy can also cause rapid weight gain. Unless a lover wants to see his beloved partner put on 15 pounds, break out with acne, and become insulin dependent, why would he or she offer candy? That’s a great question.

If your lover gives you candy, you should feel insulted. Candy is a macabre and morbid offering to anyone. What makes candy a treat? In reality, candy is punishment and should be viewed as such. Candy will do you absolutely no good at Valentine’s Day or on any other day. Candy is a means for companies to sell you something highly addictive that will reap them huge profits while making you, your children, and/or your loved ones sick in the process. Candy has no purpose in the human body.

This Valentine’s Day, ask your loved one to offer you flowers, movie tickets, or a romantic dinner, but to SKIP the candy. You will be glad he or she did.

May the candy NOT be with you,

Jay
Kind of gives you that warm, fuzzy feeling . . .