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  #1  
Old 01-11-2008, 12:30 PM
Donna Donna is offline
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Subject: The Polite Way to Pee


During one of her daily classes, a teacher, trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:

"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee."The Villages Florida

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?"

Sherman said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word 'bathroom' at the dinner table.The Villages Florida

And you, little Edward, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?

I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, to whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner."The Villages Florida

The Villages FloridaThe teacher fainted



  #2  
Old 01-11-2008, 01:50 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

roflao
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  #3  
Old 01-11-2008, 01:58 PM
Taltarzac
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I wonder what the statistics are on first dates and reaching home base. :joke:
  #4  
Old 01-11-2008, 03:10 PM
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nONIE nONIE is offline
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OMG!!!! :redface: :redface: :redface:
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  #5  
Old 01-11-2008, 04:10 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Donna!!!

I am soo shocked!!!

But,

Great early morning giggle ;D

Kathie :redface:

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  #6  
Old 01-11-2008, 04:12 PM
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Kath,

Late morning giggle for us!
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  #7  
Old 01-11-2008, 04:16 PM
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Oops! Always forget the time diff :dontknow: Duh!

Thanks, Nonie

It still was a good giggle even though I was shocked :redface:
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Bronx ♫ Los Angeles ♫ Hadley, Sept. 08 and then the beautiful village of Mallory Square 2014

A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."


(For those who know me) I consider ON TIME to be when I get there.....
  #8  
Old 01-11-2008, 04:46 PM
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HI! My name is Edward ;D
Handie :joke:
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  #9  
Old 01-11-2008, 05:21 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Handie (aka lil Edward)

How come I'm not shocked at that!???

But, the #1 question is, do you ever date "nice young women"???

Have a good day! :

Kath :redface:



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Bronx ♫ Los Angeles ♫ Hadley, Sept. 08 and then the beautiful village of Mallory Square 2014

A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."


(For those who know me) I consider ON TIME to be when I get there.....
  #10  
Old 01-11-2008, 05:55 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Taltarzac
I wonder what the statistics are on first dates and reaching home base. :joke:
Tal..Ya gotta ask Handi that one...The Villages Florida
  #11  
Old 01-11-2008, 06:00 PM
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Ummmm, let me guess.

I bet the stats on that would be 100% (or at least 98%) for Mr. H, don't you agree Donna?
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A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."


(For those who know me) I consider ON TIME to be when I get there.....
  #12  
Old 01-11-2008, 06:07 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Kathi,
I am NOT touching that one...The Villages Florida
  #13  
Old 01-11-2008, 10:24 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Donna
I am NOT touching that one
I really hope that was pun intended. :dontknow: :joke: :dontknow:
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  #14  
Old 01-11-2008, 10:32 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Toot, the
wonder dog, at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman behind me
asked if I had a dog. On impulse on this stupid question, I told her no,
I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again.

Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last
time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care
ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your pants pocke ts with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
poisoned me.

I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff up this cute Irish Setter and a
car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
laughing so hard!

WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore!!!
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  #15  
Old 01-11-2008, 10:36 PM
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Default Re: Funny...

Red, you are a riot!!!!!!!!!! ;D LOL LOL
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Chicago, Il., Upstate, N.Y. Finally a snow FROG

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