Talk of The Villages Florida
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Talk of The Villages Florida (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/)
-   Just For Fun (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/just-fun-109/)
-   -   I just had to open my big mouth.... (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/just-fun-109/i-just-had-open-my-big-mouth-338933/)

FredJacobs 02-12-2023 09:25 AM
I'm reminded of the story of the young man who joins an order of monks. He see all of the monks, sitting on high stools, scrupulously copying text from a previously copied book.

An idea hits the young man so he goes and asks the head monk, "Do we know if the copies they are making today don't have any errors in them are are true to the original?"

The senior monk replies, "We should go down to the main library and check." So, they go down to the library, dust of all of the books to find the one that the scribes are currently working on.

They find the correct book and thumb through looking for errors. Suddenly, the head monk gasps and shouts, "It says celebrate, CELEBRATE!"

Maybelle 02-12-2023 10:59 AM
Omg!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThirdOfFive (Post 2186253)
Good one.

My wife claims that any woman can keep any man happy by following three simple rules:

1. Good food,
2. good sex, and
3 don't b!tch too much.

My wife is a wise woman.
You, sir, have gotten stuck in the 50's! Time to rethink your opinions of the role of women.

Maybelle 02-12-2023 11:01 AM
Credit card?
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Veiragirl (Post 2186535)
I add a 4th...access to husbands credit card
She can't/doesn't have one of her own?

tvbound 02-12-2023 11:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maybelle (Post 2186647)
You, sir, have gotten stuck in the 50's! Time to rethink your opinions of the role of women.
Sadly, previously in-the-closet misogynists have felt freer to espouse their ugly attitudes - in the last 7 years or so.

fdpaq0580 02-12-2023 11:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maybelle (Post 2186649)
She can't/doesn't have one of her own?
She can/does have her own. She just thinks it is more fun to spend "my" money. The reality is that everything belongs to us both, 50/50. And, my money is her money.

Djean1981 02-12-2023 01:30 PM
Funny

ThirdOfFive 02-12-2023 01:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Veiragirl (Post 2186535)
I add a 4th...access to husbands credit card
Lol! Good point.

ThirdOfFive 02-12-2023 01:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maybelle (Post 2186647)
You, sir, have gotten stuck in the 50's! Time to rethink your opinions of the role of women.
Apparently indignation can override reading comprehension at times.

This is my WIFE'S observation. Not mine.

jimjamuser 02-12-2023 02:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Taltarzac725 (Post 2185920)
What is celibacy? Celibacy can be a choice in life, or a condition imposed by circumstances.
While attending a Marriage Weekend, my wife and I listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."
He then addressed the men, “Can you men name and describe your wife's favorite flower?”
I leaned over, touched my wife's hand gently, and whispered, “Gold Medal-All-Purpose, isn't it?”
And thus began my life of celibacy...
Truly humorous! Kudos!

jimjamuser 02-12-2023 02:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tvbound (Post 2186655)
Sadly, previously in-the-closet misogynists have felt freer to espouse their ugly attitudes - in the last 7 years or so.
Real good hidden meanings there !!!!!

buster21 02-12-2023 05:37 PM
Stupid.

buster21 02-12-2023 05:38 PM
How generous of you.

buster21 02-12-2023 05:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fdpaq0580 (Post 2186658)
She can/does have her own. She just thinks it is more fun to spend "my" money. The reality is that everything belongs to us both, 50/50. And, my money is her money.
How generous of you.

buster21 02-12-2023 05:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by retiredguy123 (Post 2186562)
A wife is standing naked in front of a full length mirror in the bedroom. She says to her husband, "Honey, I'm old, fat, and ugly. I really need a complement". The husbands says, "Well, your eyesight is darn near perfect".
He’s the fat grotesque one!

buster21 02-12-2023 05:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jimjamuser (Post 2186720)
Truly humorous! Kudos!
No it’s not… get with the times man.


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