‘Deprogramming’ a relative in a cult.

‘Deprogramming’ a relative in a cult.

Notices

» Site Navigation
Home Page The Villages Maps The Villages Activities The Villages Clubs The Villages Book Healthcare Rentals Real Estate Section Classified Section The Villages Directory Home Improvement Site Guidelines Advertising Info Register Now Video Tutorials Frequently Asked Questions
» Newsletter Signup
» Premium Tower
» Advertisements
» Trending News
» Tower Sponsors




















» Premium Sponsors
» Banner Sponsors
» Advertisements
Reply
 
Thread Tools
‘Deprogramming’ a relative in a cult.
  #1  
Old 08-20-2019, 07:24 PM
ColdNoMore's Avatar
ColdNoMore ColdNoMore is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Between 466 & 466A
Posts: 8,987
Thanks: 0
Thanked 62 Times in 45 Posts
Default ‘Deprogramming’ a relative in a cult.

A very old friend of mine, is at his wit’s end with his 27 year old granddaughter (her parents are deceased)...who has apparently become deeply involved in a cult.

Since I feel very fortunate that I’ve never personally had this particular problem, all I can do for my friend is to lend a sympathetic ear…and try to do research to see if I can forward any helpful advice to him.

He has said that the most confusing part for him, is that she’s not a drug/alcohol abuser, acts normal and kind in a lot of other ways…but is absolutely closed off and becomes irate to ANY criticism (even factual ones) of her group.

Anyone ever go through this, or know someone who did, and if so how did you/they handle it…and was it successful?

This particular link seems to cover a lot of the same issues and problems...that he’s described to me.

Cults (Poke Here)

Quote:

How Cults Manipulate People

Many people now agree that cults frequently psychologically manipulate their membership to ensure conformity and control. Steve Hassan's excellent book "Combating Cult Mind-Control" is a great starting point. The following points come from numerous sources. Not all of these are found in every cult but enough of them are found in most cults to make them very frightening places that inflict deep psychological damage on their membership.

1. Submission to Leadership - Leaders tend to be absolute, prophets of God, God Himself, specially anointed apostle, or just a strong, controlling, manipulative person who demands submission even if changes or conflicts occur in ideology or behavior.

2. Polarized World View - The group is all that is good; everything outside is bad.

3. Feeling Over Thought - Emotions, intuitions, mystical insights are promoted as more important than rational conclusions.

4. Manipulation of Feelings - Techniques designed to stimulate emotions, usually employing group dynamics to influence responses.

5. Denigration of Critical Thinking - Can go so far as to characterize any independent thought as selfish, and rational use of intellect as evil.

6. Salvation or Fulfillment can only be realized in the group.

7. End Justifies the Means - Any action or behavior is justifiable as long as it furthers the group's goals. The group (leader) becomes absolute truth and is above all man-made laws.

8. Group Over Individual - The group's concerns supersede an individual's goals, needs, aspirations, and concerns. Conformity is the key.
__________________
Standing up for the underdog and against bullies...every chance I get.
Reply With Quote

  #2  
Old 08-20-2019, 07:30 PM
manaboutown's Avatar
manaboutown manaboutown is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: NJ, NY, SC, PA, DC, MD, VA, NM, CA, ID and finally FL.
Posts: 4,261
Thanks: 501
Thanked 136 Times in 87 Posts
Default

There are folks who specialize in deprogramming, or there used to be. Some research may locate one. Sometimes the deprogrammers are former cult members. It is an extremely difficult procedure. Care must be taken about legal issues. It is tricky and does not always work.
__________________
"No one is more hated than he who speaks the truth." Plato

“To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.” Thomas Paine
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #3  
Old 08-20-2019, 08:58 PM
Taltarzac725's Avatar
Taltarzac725 Taltarzac725 is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 40,040
Thanks: 349
Thanked 174 Times in 159 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColdNoMore View Post
A very old friend of mine, is at his wit’s end with his 27 year old granddaughter (her parents are deceased)...who has apparently become deeply involved in a cult.

Since I feel very fortunate that I’ve never personally had this particular problem, all I can do for my friend is to lend a sympathetic ear…and try to do research to see if I can forward any helpful advice to him.

He has said that the most confusing part for him, is that she’s not a drug/alcohol abuser, acts normal and kind in a lot of other ways…but is absolutely closed off and becomes irate to ANY criticism (even factual ones) of her group.

Anyone ever go through this, or know someone who did, and if so how did you/they handle it…and was it successful?

This particular link seems to cover a lot of the same issues and problems...that he’s described to me.

Cults (Poke Here)
I had a professor that seemed to specialize in the study of cults. This was while I was at the University of Nevada, Reno.

One thing. They are not all the same. What might help your friend's granddaughter might vary from the kind of cult involved.

Content Pages of the Encyclopedia of Religion and Social Science

Last edited by Taltarzac725; 08-21-2019 at 03:37 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-20-2019, 10:38 PM
Midnight Cowgirl Midnight Cowgirl is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 421
Thanks: 3
Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts
Default

Does the granddaughter live with your friend, her grandfather?
In what type of cult is she involved?
I'm not knowledgable regarding any type of cult, however, I would think for her to be reprogrammed, she would have to be somewhat receptive.
If the cult is "dangerous" could it be reported to authorities?
Is she so far gone that he could have her Baker Acted?

That situation is really so sad. Your friend really needs to speak with a professional.
Is there some kind of mental health facility or hospital near him where he could go speak with someone for advice?
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-21-2019, 02:39 AM
GrumpyOldMan's Avatar
GrumpyOldMan GrumpyOldMan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 220
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Very difficult question. First at 27 she is going to have to be receptive to the idea of deprogramming and I expect that is not going to be easy.

Second is the question of what is the "cult"... not everyone would agree on that I am sure.

In the case of a minor it would be easier, but still have legal issues.
__________________
You ever get the feeling that the world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes? -- George Goble
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-21-2019, 07:09 AM
graciegirl's Avatar
graciegirl graciegirl is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: From Ohio, now happily live in Laurel Valley
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 467
Thanked 223 Times in 135 Posts
Default

///
__________________
I have to be myself, everyone else is taken.

Last edited by graciegirl; 08-21-2019 at 02:00 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-21-2019, 07:49 AM
GrumpyOldMan's Avatar
GrumpyOldMan GrumpyOldMan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 220
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Before we go too far down the road of "Baker Act" lets not forget that the person is a 27 year old, an adult, and has the right to her own beliefs.

Quote:
Many people look on Christianity as a cult.
Exactly, I am an atheist and my brother has a ThD and is a retired Southern Baptist minister (we have some interesting conversations). I disagree with those who say Christianity is a cult. However, there are cults who claim to be Christians.

I do think that a disinterested and qualified 3rd party would have to make a determination if a person is a threat to themselves or others before considering actions taken against their will.

Let's not forget the Parents and pastor of the teen that beat him to death trying to get him to denounce the devil, just a few years ago.
__________________
You ever get the feeling that the world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes? -- George Goble
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-21-2019, 07:52 AM
karostay's Avatar
karostay karostay is offline
Platinum member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Conn/Maine / St James
Posts: 1,709
Thanks: 7
Thanked 30 Times in 24 Posts
Default

I believe in myself, my family and friends That's all I need to guide me start to finish
__________________
Don't take life Too Serious ..It isn't permanent
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-21-2019, 07:53 AM
ColdNoMore's Avatar
ColdNoMore ColdNoMore is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Between 466 & 466A
Posts: 8,987
Thanks: 0
Thanked 62 Times in 45 Posts
Default

For those offering what appears as heart-felt suggestions, to a very disconcerting problem for my buddy...I thank you.

For the usual suspects, looking to get yet another thread they don't like closed...
__________________
Standing up for the underdog and against bullies...every chance I get.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-21-2019, 08:40 AM
Taltarzac725's Avatar
Taltarzac725 Taltarzac725 is offline
Sage
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 40,040
Thanks: 349
Thanked 174 Times in 159 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColdNoMore View Post
For those offering what appears as heart-felt suggestions, to a very disconcerting problem for my buddy...I thank you.

For the usual suspects, looking to get yet another thread they don't like closed...
Hope you hang in there. I had met an attractive black man hanging out outside the Humanities Building on the University of Nevada, Reno. He was very friendly and I was about 22 or so. Or even younger. We got to talking and he told me about a group of his friends who had an apartment near by who liked to talk about Philosophy.

So I went that afternoon to check it out. He had handed me a card that said Unification Church or something like that with the address.

Turned out they were the Moonies and he was the Chapter Head for Northern Nevada.

Some man at the apartment laid out the Moonies plan of uniting the races by interracial-marriages. Arranged marriages with the aim of procreation primarily and not romance.

I poked holes through the plan the best I could but still got invites from the black man for the Weekend Retreat and they had started phoning my parents with very insulting phone calls about my parents corrupting the youth. I finally picked up one of these calls and used language a sailor would be proud of.

These weekend retreats were where the Unification church brain washes people. A lot involved separating the target from his or her care givings or parents and friends.

I did talk in private through an essay about these experiences with that Sociology of Professor at the University of Nevada, Reno. He had wanted me to give a speech about it in front of the class but I said no feeling very uncomfortable about the whole experience. It only lasted about ten days if that. And just a couple of visits by me to this apartment near UNR as there was a very cute girl I was attracted to and the black man also played on that as much as he could. "She is going to be there...."

These "cults" do seem to target those they see as vulnerable. All the lonely people.... Jerome (the black man/Northern Nevada Unification Church Chapter head ) could tell that I was a man with few friends and he played on that for all it was worth.

Last edited by Taltarzac725; 08-21-2019 at 08:50 AM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
group, cults, cult, manipulate, lot

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:37 PM.