Rude, Miserable People
 

Why are so many people rude and miserable? Seriously, you're retired and living in a beautiful place. Why aren't you happy? Better yet, why are you so darn rude and miserable? When you're walking by my house commenting on my shrubs, lanai furniture or house color ..... I CAN HEAR YOU. I pay my mortgage, you don't. If you don't like the look of my yard or house, don't look at it. But keep your comments to yourself. I may surprise you one day and be rude right back to you!!!

Don't take it so personally
 

I think you may be taking these comments too personally. I'm sure you've walked by homes at some point and commented on colors, landscaping, etc. Everyone's tastes are different and it's different strokes for different folks. I walk a lot and often non shalantly say something I either like or dislike. I may say those shrubs are too big for that space, or the driveway looks great or I like or dislike the color of the house. It's human nature to comment of things like that. I wouldn't take it to heart....your home is decorated to your taste and all that matters is that you like it. People don't mean any harm. Sometimes it's just conversation. I've overheard people talking about my home on the golf course and some don't like the size of our putting green. It's ok with me as I built it for me and not for them. Everyone has an opinion... It's ok.

just turn the hose on them....

Where do you live? Can you post a picture so we know what you're talking about?

Yes there are rude unhappy folks here. Several weeks ago while waiting for American Sniper to start, a woman in the row behind us must have almost tripped getting into her seat so she grabbed the back of the chair of the lady sitting next to me. When the lady turned around the rude woman said, "you'll live!"

I would have thought the comment would be, "oh I'm sorry" or "please excuse me".

I just want to know.....what happens to folks that they feel they have the right to be rude?

The good news is that there are so many fine, kind folks here in TV!

I seriously think some people just have aches and pains and that makes them angry.. I know when I am achy etc, I catch myself thinking some nasty ( maybe saying it would make me feel be better ?? ( insert laugh ).. but tell me you have never sat and people watched and made comments on their clothes, hair, etc?? Half the fun of sitting at an airport !!

Look it this way... their lives are realy really sad if the only thing they can talk about is what other people do that they don't like.

It reminds me of a quotation attributed to one of P.L. Travers' (Mary Poppins) grandchildren that she "died loving no one and with no one loving her."

Alternately, sit out there and loudly comment on their clothes, make up hair cuts, and the way they walk... and then laugh *loudly*

Separating Pearls
 

vlm790: When people are critical of you or yours instead of getting offended as painful as it may be, you may first want to analyze what is being said and by whom. I have found this to be so useful for me in separating rude and miserable people from those sharing information that would help me grow and advance and better create

Personal Best Regards:

I'm dying to know about your shrubs, lanai furniture and house color.
Please post photos.

I have red roses, a porch, rockers , brick & tan.

That never happens to me now that I can hardly hear.
Count your blessings.

Where's Dr. Phil when you need him!

Q TIP ( Quit Taking It Personally)

I like it and it's something Dr. Phil might say.

I have sparse geraniums, overgrown firecracker bushes, and a container full of dirt that used to house a plant.

Forgive me for saying, but overgrown firecracker bushes sound awfully dangerous, especially in a drought.

Good thing we don't smoke.:boom:

I just use this as a mantra when I hear someone ranting who was usually nice or the someone who complains about everything is yapping.. " oh well medications change"

What goes around, comes around.

It is true; what goes around comes around; also known as the law of attraction, Karma, etc.

Rude, miserable people will attract more rude, miserable people to them. Stay far away as they will poison your spirit.

That's what my Uncle Eddie used to always say. Then again, he worked in an amusement park.

"Gloom, despair, and agony on me
Deep, dark depression, excessive misery
If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all
Gloom, despair, and agony on me". Buck Owens and Roy Clark - Hee Haw

I actually think I hear some people whistling this tune sometimes through their scowl. :grumpy:

Those idiots are not representative of The Villages. They are sad, angry and most importantly highly insecure beings. They go through their days always trying to fill the big empty in their minds, and trying to attack others so that they can feel or hope to feel better than you and thus somehow more secure about themselves. Silly, isn't it. Sad, isn't it?

I was sitting in my car outside of Bealls on 441 at ten a.m. and two women with lots of makeup and jewelry walked by me and one said loudly and after looking at my car, "Oh, that reminds me, I have to get my car washed. It looks disgraceful." I couldn't help it - I laughed almost in her face.

These sad souls can and do hurt others feelings. But the time they spend in your head is up to you. They're little people. They don't pay rent to me. They cannot rent space in my mind. If they pass your house regularly, a little sign at the curbside "No Rude Comments Please" will send a fine message.

Best of luck, and remember, as has been said, your house is yours and is the best one in the Villages.

So true
 

So true. I would also chalk it up to insecure people who perhaps are "in pain" whether emotionally or physically & have a need to vent. Obviously, the original poster chose to live in a beautiful community with certain standards for attractiveness such as all modern developments abide by.

Up here, we have charming homes alongside more quaint homes alongside really dilapidated older homes........it varies from neighborhood to neighborhood........there's also the "city mouse" standards vs. the "country mouse" standards we have long ago learned to live with............it really works when people are just accepting of others' preferences.

Here is an interesting poem......

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.


Mewlana Jalaluddin Rumi :

So far we've found out that the commenters are unhappy, rude, miserable, insecure, mean, idiots whose lives are "really sad." Not to worry though... that Karma stuff is going to get 'em. Gonna get 'em good!!
So far nobody has come up with "Maybe the people walking by are renters."
If somebody had posted that there was a messy house with a messy lanai and driveway everyone would be worked up about some low-life messing up the neighborhood.
If a bunch of passersby have commented it's time to step back and take a look.

It's not just their words, I'm tired of people ramming me with their shopping carts and then saying something rude to me when I turn around and look at them (in shock that someone would actually hit someone!). Also, being rude with the way they drive ~ cutting people off, running stop signs, drifting over in the lane and when I've honked at them so they won't hit me, the guy rolled down his window and screamed at me. My goodness, if they are in pain (I'm also in pain!), if they are THAT miserable, they might consider staying in their homes and have a pity party.

Shame on you for eavesdropping on people's private conversations...teehee

You also must remember that some people who live by themselves do not realize they are talking out loud or do not realize they can talk in their "quiet voice".

Example of this : while waiting for church to begin; waiting for entertainment to begin at Savannah Center.

you are so lucky to have overgrown firecracker bushes! mine keep dying on me! If you want to split them, I'll be happy to help! :)

If you have overgrown firecracker bushes, I'll help you split them! mine keep dying on me, how I envy overgrown firecracker bushes! I can trade you overgrown candy corn bushes! :)

sorry for the double post

I think many residents of The Villages are afflicted with the "I'm smarter than everyone else and I feel compelled to constantly prove it" disease. I sometimes even feel the symptoms myself, but I work hard to fight them off.

And, as the OP stated, some are just rude, miserable people THAT. DON'T. CARE. WHAT. THEY. SAY. They would really be rude and miserable if they were having to put up with the cold and snow that my wife and I along with the rest of the the less fortunate people in the mid to north part of the US are having to do.

My observation regarding the rudeness here in TV involves the wait staff and store clerks. Never in my life have I seen such behavior by adults toward those that are serving them. They absolutely feel that they are better than those taking care of them or they would never be so rude. I find myself being overly friendly because I feel so sorry for them having to put up with this. How miserable people must be in their daily life to feel the need to complain so much about everything.

Me too. And I lose the battle way too often, but your gentle reminder will keep me aware for awhile.

I agree for the most part. Fortunately the rude ones are in the minority. I lived in Fort Lauderdale for a few years and the rude rate is much MUCH higher there.

I agree! And the overbearing, "superior" ones who treat wait staff and store clerks like dirt under foot usually have a distinct, foghorn-loud accent that is not southern!!

Might just be on their way to senility
 

Might just be on their way to senility? Been there, experienced that.....as per rude elders.

However, it was not in TV.........but in 1994 upon our move to Venice Florida where we bought our beachfront condo.

Our kids having graduated university, moved out of state, married, etc., we sold the family homestead.......at age 49.

Since we had been looking for a "Main Street" type community, this town seemed quite attractive, beautifully laid out, etc. with a real downtown & all the things we were used to in a community with the "plus" of being on the Gulf of Mexico with newly refurbished beach, nice jetties.......close to Sarasota with all of its culture......Ringling museum, etc. Plus, winter home of the Ringling Brothers circus.

As I was pre planning our car reservations at the Sarasota Airport, via the phone, the woman asked me why I had chosen Venice over Sarasota....?

She went on to say that Venice was filled with OLD FOLKS who bumped their shopping carts into you at the supermarket, drove the wrong way on the roads & highways, etc., etc. & were just plain RUDE......actually all of the things you mention above.

I told her we had done our research, visited half a dozen times, thought it was very pretty; laid out nicely as a real town with an Esplanade along the Gulf beach......where the condos were.......plus leading up to it was the main "avenue" with a park up & down the center.......very attractive, nice & long for walking.....a gazebo, etc.......just a pretty town.

It had an antique district up a side street........nice shops.

Well, our home sold faster than we expected......we ended up there sooner than we thought.........during "high season" in December or what you guys call snowbird season.

The rude folks were the elderly.........we were only 49.

After buying a beachfront condo, totally remodeling it from top to bottom........everything new.........we missed our home town & sold it to a lady from Hawaii. Luckily, it sold fast.

Up here, people are too FROZEN to be rude. Plus we know each other going generations back. Also, we know if someone is in the early stages of Alzheimers or dementia....both of which often present or exhibit with belligerence.

Expecting our 5th snowstorm this weekend which they say will last for days & days.......some are saying 3 , some are saying 4 days.

Luckily, our young neighbor kitty corner across from our home, has been excellent re plowing us out with his truck plow.......my hubby hasn't had to use the snowblower once yet this winter. We are fortunate. Looking forward to our spring & summer vacations....so "thinking spring".

Again, I think rude people are not even aware of their own rudeness but may be in some type of physical or emotional pain of their own........& just take it out on whomever is in their path......sad to say.

But, now at age 70......perhaps we are the "very old folks" that the Sarasota clerk was warning us about when we were 49 years young. How time flies; it seems like yesterday. Luckily, all of our neighbors & friends are aging along with us........so will forgive us any lapses of our own in compassion or good manners. The younger neighbors respect us as the "elders" in the neighborhood, as we once respected our own elders....ditto.......who are long gone but fondly remembered.

At times, rude people don't even realize they are being rude.
If one is consciously being rude...then they have a problem that no one can fathom or fix.


EXAMPLE: "it took very little alcohol to make him belligerent, and he became even more thuggish and incoherent when he threw in a few sleeping pills as well. —Christopher Hitchens, New York Times Book Review, 8 Oct. 2000"

"inclined to or exhibiting assertiveness, hostility, or combativeness '
— belligerent noun

All I am saying is give peace a chance.