Uncertain about the Future
 

Can anyone relate about moving to the Villages as being uncertain if this is the right thing to do. And if so, what happened after you moved there. We are getting ready to make that move.

Bought in '08--best thing we have done in retirement. Drink the Kool-Aid

A lot would depend on the reason(s) why you are uncertain.

https://www.talkofthevillages.com/fo...2/#post1497865

Most people have misgivings about making a major move across the country. It really is pioneering in a REAL sense. Do you have trouble with major change or find yourself worrying about things? Do you find that the glass is half full or half empty? Most people do worry about moving so far from the familiar.

I thought that the commonality of our age would be more important than other differences but that did not turn out to be true. I have learned a lot about cultural geographic characteristics and customs. We haven't had the same backgrounds and there is an immense difference in how we deal with each other. I found that took some getting used to.

It is a friendly place, but the truth is it takes years to make the kind of friends we left behind. We have a lot of pleasant people to do things with but only a few we feel would be there in a dire situation.

I would do it again, and I think this is a wonderful place to live, but sometimes I long for the old, long time friends left in Ohio who didn't honk at stop lights.

This reminds me of a time long time ago whether I should take the new job I was offered or stay at my present job at the time. I was apprehensive and wrote the pros and cons of each job. I decided to move on to new job. Made a wise decision as I got a bigger pension with the path I went and plus the old place went out of business in 10 years. This fits into this decision.

I agree. OP, if you could provide more information as to what your concerns are, maybe others could address it more directly.

Is it fear of change? Lack of knowledge about TV? Have you visited often enough and/or long enough to get an idea of what it might be like to live there?

We have gradually increased our visits from a few days to a month at a time over the years. Hopefully our next stay will be for 3 months. The only thing I can tell you is I have never been happy to come back home after time spent in TV. I come home to almost immediately start planning my next trip back down. That's how I know I belong there, not here. Hope this helps.

From what I have seen and experienced those who transition well from their hometowns to 55 and over communities tend to be relatively healthy, outgoing, somewhat adventuresome, make new friends readily and enjoy changes of scene and new experiences.

Possibly some of the happiest in TV are those who have family members and/or long time friends living nearby.

I have found one can make new friends but one cannot make new old friends.

Some great wisdom in your post.

We came to The Villages, from MA, for a long weekend in 2014, knowing almost nothing about it. We did know a couple who lived here though and they took us around took us around and showed a lot about the Villages. That weekend we bought a house and moved in one month later.

Our street was a new one and we got involved with lots of good neighbors, learned to golf, did some home upgrades, and in general had a good time.

In then end I think it is very hard understand the Villages without diving in and living here.

I think we were a bit lucky but it was the best move we ever made.

Of course your milage may vary.

I would never pretend to be wise enough to advise someone on such an important and personal decision. But I will say this - It is a not a life time commitment. Remember that you will never be 'stuck' here if you change your mind.

that's what i was thinking

So true, especially in TV versus many other communities where houses don't sell as quickly.

I also would add to this that the OP may want to buy in small. You can always move into a bigger home if you stay and decide what you purchased is not big enough. No matter what, the investment is not as great and resale may not be as difficult. The patio villas in particular seem to sell rather quickly.

Or as many have suggested before, you can always rent for a year and test the waters before investing.

My husband and I just bought a home in TV and will be moving the end of this year from Massachusetts. We are excited but nervous at the same time. The thought of leaving our family and friends is a bit daunting. I'm sure once we get settled in we will be fine. St least we won't have to deal with the New England winter!

We moved in 14 from PA....made lot of new friends here and our old friends stay in touch and visit. This place is not for everyone, have had some in our neighborhood move back, primarily because of family. Based on what the real estate market has been here, wife and I agreed that the worst think that would happen if this didn't work out, we would sell here and move back. When we sold up north we maximized revenue in that market and feel we can do the same here. In our view, the financial risk is low, the emotional risk might be higher.

Over the past few years, from what I remember of posters who decided to return north it seems the #1 reason is grandchildren, and the #2 reason was death of a spouse. Beyond that, every other reason that's been given is usually unique to the situation. It's usually not anything like, we couldn't make friends, didn't like the weather, maybe for some it's too hot, nothing to do there with all the free time, these things just don't normally come up.

I think you either want to do it or you don't. If you start disecting everything that could go wrong you are just you are just going to make yourself crazy. There is nothing in life that is not a risk and tomorrow is never guaranteed.

I did not experience second thoughts when we were planning our move. TOTV played a big role in my comfort level in moving here. How could so many happy, intelligent folks love this place? We have been here 10 years and I wish we had moved here earlier.

That's like asking "who has the best hamburger" it's different for everyone ... but for us it was a life changing positive experience (yes, there are things we dislike and miss from our "previous life) and couldn't be happier. We came down "cold" for a month in Sept 2016, went home 9/30, hired and agent 10/2, put our house for sale on Oct 31, sold it Nov 2, closed Jan 5th 2017 and headed south on the same day "homeless and with nothing but clothes and personal stuff." :) Found a cheap rental here for 2 months, bought within 2 weeks of arriving and moved in Feb 1 2017.

Enjoy
 

Are you uneasy about moving to The Villages, or simply uneasy about moving at all?

Is there some other retirement community that you would be more comfortable about moving to, or are you simply apprehensive about the unknown elements of moving to any new place?

During my working career I was transferred four times, and taking transfers was considered a necessary element of job advancement, so coming to The Villages was no big deal for me, particularly since I grew up in Florida and was comfortable about the weather, the geography, the wild life, and other things that seem to concern some people coming here.

I frankly cannot conceive of a retirement community with more activities for "active seniors" and opportunities to make new friends.

I tested the waters before jumping in by an initial one week rental. Then a one month rental. By then I grew to love the place. You might want to consider a long term rental to see how well you feel you fit in.

In any case ---- Enjoy!

We don’t think as any house as a forever home. We had built three houses, before we bought in TV. We came the first time in 07, and didn’t buy until 2010.

We are on our third house here, and still have our house up north. We enjoy the summers and lakes you can swim in, so at least for a few more years multiple houses are not a problem for us.

Our grands are almost all in college, and our kids all live in different states. Even if something should happen to one of us, I would keep both houses. We have many friends here who have the same situation of a home here and a summer home.

👍 Sounds great!

Thanks for the replies. I guess it is the nervousness of moving to another state. We have been to the Villages numerous times. Love to get away from NY winters. I worry about my husband having a heart attack outside with snow shoveling, our neighbors help us with their snowblowers. Now we are the old neighbors. When we moved here, we were the young neighbors that used to help.

I moved to TV from MA to escape the winter up there. The only thing I'm sorry about is I wish I'd done it sooner.

If you plan to be full time then make sure of two things. First if you have grandchildren in another State be sure you and the spouse are ok with visiting them as often as you decide is necessary and that you will have no problem in being far away. Next, be sure you are ok with long, humid, hot summers and that the heat does not bother you so much you become unhappy. Those are probably the two most popular reasons I have found for people moving here and leaving. I just told my wife that she could visit the grandchildren any time she wanted. Since we are both Southern born we are use to the summers. Otherwise come on down and they will for sure sell you a home.

O.P. I know of one of our frequent posters, who the last time he visited stayed for three months, but he always had something holding him back from moving here. The last thing was his mothers home had to be sold, and he was reluctant to take less, spruce it up, etc.

The heartbreaking reality is that a deadly illness interrupted his longing to be here.

If not now, when? Sometimes I really miss the rest of our wonderful family and wish we were closer but they have scattered to the four winds persuing their active and successful lives. Oldest daughter leaves for London for three years on this coming Sunday.

Sometimes we have to do what we haven't done all of our lives; throw caution to the wind and jump in with both feet.

The water is fine. You will love it.

Yes those are two great reasons. Grandchildren can visit. I do not mind long, hot summers. Actually we have them here in NY also, maybe a little bit more humid in Florida but there is no snow there.

Yes so true. You said it best! I have a friend who sold her house and backed out of it a couple of times. Now her husband has died and she wished she had made a move to where she really wanted to live then. Sometimes talking about moving is just easier than actually doing the moving. Hopefully things will work out! Thank you.

Rent first.

You make me wonder
 

Why would you ask people who do not know you what they think YOU should do?

It is a major decision to move. Leaving a former residence, friends, packing etc etc.

We moved to the villages four years ago. Was it a smart move? For us the answer is YES. Was it the only option?
OF COURSE NOT.

My advice-if you have not done so rent for a while. If, you are falling for the line that prices are going up. That is true but, if you have a yet unsold home it's price also going up.

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Making a big change is hard especially when leaving family and friends behind. Also with dealing with a life they have known and felt comfortable in, as opposed to starting something new.

I think it's perfectly natural to have anxiety about moving from one state to another and dealing with the "unknowns".

Only you can answer that question whether you have the where with all, to deal with the move.

Being a single person and moving to TV was a little harder as one does not have someone to consult with. After several months, I knew the move was right for me and love TV.

If you feel your anxiety is too great, then maybe you should rent for awhile, until you can get a better assessment, if this a correct move for you and yours.

In TV, it' s easy to make new friendships as you have to do is open your mouth and talk to people.

The only thing that is certain in life is "change". Sometimes people stay in situations, even when they are bad because they fear changing to something different.

The choice is yours.

I think everybody that moves here always wonders if they are doing the right thing and of course this causes anxiety. We had that but have never regretted moving here. It' fantastic!!!

Wow Gracie. You hit the nail on the head. If not now, when? It’s our time. Best decision we’ve ever made.

I'll be sure to show my husband this. ;)

What Gracie said! It feels much better now that my son and his wife have moved nearby!

Tomcat-I know what you mean & I think feeling uncertain is natural when you move! We are literally in the midst of it all now. Just unloaded pods yesterday. How do we feel? Ecstatic. The more time we are in our new home, the more we know we made the right decision. We came to TV for one reason---pickleball--once here, we realized we also came for golf & many other things we love to do...but mainly pball :)

I have never played pickleball. I have to try. It looks like fun! As I sit here in NY, it is very hot outside and this is what I will feel in Florida. Hopefully this life change will be a positive one. Thank you all for your replies. I think I am feeling a little anxious and yes I think it is normal. I lived all my life in 4 seasons so this right here will be a change for me. But I am not looking forward to snow anymore. I think that is saying something right there.

I know like many reading your posts, we wish we could help. I hope you have a spouse coming with you, that makes it somewhat easier, knowing someone when you get here. Sometimes just talking over your worries with your medical doctor can help as well. Moving is a major health stressor.

Wishing you happiness.

Anyone who moves to The Villages so to partake of its "Lifestyle and Activities" needs to keep in mind that the day will come when for health reasons, he won't be able to partake of such activities anymore. So it is important he forms friendships, and if friendships are that important, perhaps he may want to stay where he already is.

I don't know....Chuck Yeager is still flying, golfing and hiking at 95. Going from SoCal to West VA to watch his Mountaineers and hang out with the students....

He has a great Twitter feed largely about his adventures past AND present.