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PennBF 06-29-2019 08:18 AM

Why
 
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have. The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:

manaboutown 06-29-2019 08:28 AM

Probably most of them are the products of the environments in which they have spent most of their lives. In my experience people in some areas do not seem to be able or want to chill out and relax.

leftyf 06-29-2019 09:22 AM

They are in a hurry to die

ColdNoMore 06-29-2019 09:37 AM

To slow "them" down, I just accidentally stick out my leg...and trip'em.


:1rotfl:

DonH57 06-29-2019 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PennBF (Post 1660923)
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have. The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:

I see many of which you describe in and around the villages every day. I only think to myself how long will it be before they keel over. Totally sad they can't or won't slow down as if they're still working and have a schedule to keep.:ohdear:

CFrance 06-29-2019 11:25 AM

They are the Type A's. Nothing to do about them but avoid.

Velvet 06-29-2019 12:09 PM

ADHD maybe? Ritalin helps those.

I remember my first trip to Manhattan decades ago. It was Sunday and people rushed across the street to walk to the park then rushed back. The taxis rushed through the lights. When I got back it took me 2 weeks before I could relax again.

The next summer my family was at the beach and my 10 year old brother got so badly sun burned we needed to go to a hospital. We drove to Atlanta, which was the nearest big city. I dashed into Bloomingdale’s and there at the café on the Mezzanine I quickly asked a lady (wearing an amazingly hat) where the nearest hospital was. She pointed to the seat beside her and in slow beautiful Southern drawl, she said “Join me for tea and we can talk about it.”

Mikeod 06-29-2019 01:07 PM

I agree some of it is from previous environments. I was in Southern California prior to TV and remember the driving competitions on the freeway. It was a game to gain each car length in front of the next guy. At merges, you invited a merging car to enter your land BEHIND you not in front. If you did allow a car to merge in front of you, you’d better be prepared to see two or three others tailgating in before you could move again.If you were the merging car, you had to stick your front end into the lane and invite a car to hit you or let you in.

Once I got here, it took a few months to get accustomed to normal driving habits again. I’m sure some don’t ever adjust. Just let them go. I’m not in that much of a hurry and won’t let them rent space in my head.

OrangeBlossomBaby 06-29-2019 01:17 PM

...because it's not possible that any of these people have jobs and are on their lunch break. Or have doctor's appointments and want to eat before they get there. Or have heard some horrible news and are waiting for a family member to show up and tell them about it. Or have been made late to something already, by people who don't appreciate that not everyone has the rest of their lives to sit and chill.

How about all those people with nothing better to do all day than to occupy space and waste the waiter's time with idle chitchat, have some consideration for people who might actually have something they need to DO that day, and want to enjoy a meal out on their way to that thing they want to do.

epoch 06-29-2019 01:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Velvet (Post 1660979)
She pointed to the seat beside her and in slow beautiful Southern drawl, she said “Join me for tea and we can talk about it.”


Nice! :)


How was the tea?

CFrance 06-29-2019 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jazuela (Post 1660991)
...because it's not possible that any of these people have jobs and are on their lunch break. Or have doctor's appointments and want to eat before they get there. Or have heard some horrible news and are waiting for a family member to show up and tell them about it. Or have been made late to something already, by people who don't appreciate that not everyone has the rest of their lives to sit and chill.

How about all those people with nothing better to do all day than to occupy space and waste the waiter's time with idle chitchat, have some consideration for people who might actually have something they need to DO that day, and want to enjoy a meal out on their way to that thing they want to do.

Holy cow.

roob1 06-29-2019 06:12 PM

Seems like you already have them "diagnosed", i.e. cannot...enjoy life, uncontrolled anxieties, hyper. :icon_wink:

I think we need to consider what is operating underneath. You are only observing behaviors that may reflect reactions to the person's current life situations, which most of us are not privy to.

I wonder what behaviors you exhibit when you are making your observations.....


Quote:

Originally Posted by PennBF (Post 1660923)
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have. The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:


Velvet 06-29-2019 07:13 PM

I think sometimes we put pressure on ourselves, want to do too much in too little time. One of the things that I say that seems to be appreciated, whether by the lady answering the phone at Citizens, or the Seco rep, or the Apple tech advisor is: “Take your time.”

I must say though, the service near the lighthouse at Sumpter was very slow as compared to what we were used to. Husband and I were sitting outside and had a lovely conversation and enjoyed the view. It was an unexpectedly nice time.

manaboutown 06-29-2019 09:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Velvet (Post 1661049)
I think sometimes we put pressure on ourselves, want to do too much in too little time. One of the things that I say that seems to be appreciated, whether by the lady answering the phone at Citizens, or the Seco rep, or the Apple tech advisor is: “Take your time.”

I must say though, the service near the lighthouse at Sumpter was very slow as compared to what we were used to. Husband and I were sitting outside and had a lovely conversation and enjoyed the view. It was an unexpectedly nice time. Some might think that seems so ordinary, but I married into mental illness and each day can be such a challenge, and over the years I have learned to grab each enjoyable moment for both of us.

Since when has there been pee in Lake Sumter?

Velvet 06-29-2019 09:44 PM

Oh no! Elementary mistake.... ‘sumpter’ refers to pack animal the Lake was definitely not that.

thelegges 06-30-2019 02:55 AM

Since this is under Medical and Health Discussion, I am guessing the observation is from a medical background, with the knowledge that each person observed is retired and living here.

Or could the OPs observation be those who are here for that multi day world win lifestyle, that in a few fleeting days think they need to make the decision of a lifetime.
Or those who have just a few days to get their new house in order to return to their current home.
Or the growing population that have moved here working remotely from home.
Possibly the many who are visiting and trying to capture every moment as quickly as possible.
As for it being a medical issue I would need to leave that up to their health care provider

OrangeBlossomBaby 06-30-2019 06:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thelegges (Post 1661066)
Since this is under Medical and Health Discussion, I am guessing the observation is from a medical background, with the knowledge that each person observed is retired and living here.

Or could the OPs observation be those who are here for that multi day world win lifestyle, that in a few fleeting days think they need to make the decision of a lifetime.
Or those who have just a few days to get their new house in order to return to their current home.
Or the growing population that have moved here working remotely from home.
Possibly the many who are visiting and trying to capture every moment as quickly as possible.
As for it being a medical issue I would need to leave that up to their health care provider

I haven't really experienced any unusually slow service anywhere I've been in the Villages. Only at Red Sauce, but it was pretty crowded so we expected delays. We sat in for dinner on a Saturday evening. We waited MUCH longer than we felt we should have. From the time we were seated, til the time the server came to greet us was almost 10 minutes. Then another 10 minutes to bring our water glasses. And around 1/2 hour to get dinner. Took us around 1/2 hour to eat (four of us), and another 20 minutes to get the check once they saw we were finished.

The food was great though, so we endured the wait. I only wished we had known what it'd be like in advance so we could've asked for bread or salads or something right away. We came there hungry and my mom ended up with a migraine from having to wait so long to eat.

That was the worst experience I've had in waiting. Everything else has been completely reasonable and more or less expected.

But I do definitely see people who enjoy taking up a LOT of time at their tables, more than seems reasonable. During the actual dinner hour, guests should just be mindful of the fact that there are people waiting to occupy their table. They shouldn't ever feel rushed, however they also shouldn't be assuming that they can just sit there another hour after they're finished, during the dinner hour, while there are people waiting in line to be seated.

DAVES 06-30-2019 07:26 AM

My opinion
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by PennBF (Post 1660923)
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have.
The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:

First of all you cannot control other people all you can control is yourself.

As to other people seeming to be hostile in a rush etc. Have you wondered why you seem to notice so many of them that you have chosen to post this?

Like most of us, we regularly go to the grocery store. Are you the one who goes down the center of the narrow isle gossiping with a friend at your side? Or on your cell phone? I regularly laugh with the cashier when they ask, with a line of people, did you find everything.

"Bouncing their legs," likely indicates they need to go to the bathroom and choose not to disturb others by leaving their seats. As to type A-perhaps. Too often I find the people that arrive to the theater late and bother everyone to get to the remaining end seat after they sit down find another seat and decide to change yet again.

Reminder, no one is perfect. Rather than others, the question to ask is how can I be better.

Fishers2tall 06-30-2019 09:17 AM

Another perspective......
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by PennBF (Post 1660923)
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have. The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:

Are there rude inconsiderate people out there who in the course of everyday life you will come into contact with? Sure there are and that will never go away. The hectic I want it now nature of our culture gets worse seemingly every year. However is it possible some of these same people are in a hurry because they are having trouble dealing with extremely painful life circumstances such as a life threatening illness either personally or to their spouse or children? Absolutely! Or maybe they just lost their job or they are getting a divorce they didn’t want. The list is endless. I would like to offer a solution to the aggravation these hyper people cause you when you come in contact with them in traffic, the grocery store, and in restaurants. A famous person once said “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.” Even though they have offended you by the way they drive or relate to people in public give them back kindness, courtesy, patience, and compassion. If you do that I think you will find that while those people might not change how they act their actions won’t bother you near as much and even more importantly you may meet someone who is in desperate need of some kindness due to what they are going through. Who knows someday you might have a life crisis that causes you to be a little frantic and you will need some extra kindness and compassion from those around you.

OrangeBlossomBaby 06-30-2019 09:41 AM

It looks like most posters here are feeling the same way as I do when I read posts like the OP. That it is important to take a moment to consider what's happening on the other side of the issue, before aggressively reacting to your uninformed conclusions.

Nonni252 06-30-2019 09:59 AM

...

Nonni252 06-30-2019 10:01 AM

...

Velvet 06-30-2019 11:05 AM

In the past, polite society segregated these kinds of behavior. Today, we are more understanding. In the north at some private clubs one needs to have several club members’ references to join. They usually vouch for the new person’s behavior.
The medically ill cannot help themselves, they don’t chose to be ill just as those with physical illness - and they deserve compassion.
And some people have a lot of responsibilities. I remember teaching during the day, studying at night for a graduate degree, at the same time looking after my newborn and keeping house for a husband who worked very long hours. Yes, I was always in a hurry those days.

Topspinmo 06-30-2019 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PennBF (Post 1660923)
We have been in The Villages for more than 10 years and notice that one thing has not changed. There are a group of residents who cannot slow down and enjoy life. In the Markets they are the ones who race to get to the cashier, that shove by you, they are the ones that consider driving is a competition and will rush to beat you at a light, cut you off and would never allow you to get by them. When you go into a restaurant they are ones who's legs are bouncing like a paddle ball, or because of uncontrolled anxieties and will yell at the waiter/waitress if it takes more than 10 minutes for your food. There should be clubs to deal with these unfortunate hyper people and help them to learn to just "Chill" and when they find themselves rushing, experiencing high anxieties to say to themselves to stop, walk slow, show patience with their neighbors and enjoy the life they worked to so hard to have. The next time you are in a restaurant or show, etc. look around and see how many are bouncing their legs and can't just relax and have a softer life. Is that you??:popcorn:

Mental disorders, run into that a lot down here.

OlifOlif 07-01-2019 03:18 AM

Ambrose O'Lippe used to be like that!

Rzepecki 07-01-2019 05:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jazuela (Post 1660991)
...because it's not possible that any of these people have jobs and are on their lunch break. Or have doctor's appointments and want to eat before they get there. Or have heard some horrible news and are waiting for a family member to show up and tell them about it. Or have been made late to something already, by people who don't appreciate that not everyone has the rest of their lives to sit and chill.

How about all those people with nothing better to do all day than to occupy space and waste the waiter's time with idle chitchat, have some consideration for people who might actually have something they need to DO that day, and want to enjoy a meal out on their way to that thing they want to do.

I was like you when I was working and am so glad retirement has given me the time to slow down and enjoy life and not get upset over every little thing. I had spent all my time under pressure, rushing and being upset. What a waste of time. So much better now.

PennBF 07-01-2019 05:59 AM

Interesting
 
It is interesting how many have responded to the observation with reasons to "enable" this behavior.That adds to the question as to why some feel the need to find reasons it is excuseable to cut your neighbor off, push and shove in lines, eat fast, insult the waiting staff if they take a few extra minutes to bring you your order, and many so ons. Kindness and consideration pays off.:popcorn:

yurkie 07-01-2019 06:34 AM

The over-crowding, due to uncontrolled population growth, only serves to aggravate the situation.

FaithinGod 07-01-2019 07:28 AM

I experience this all the time when takiing a leisurely ride in my golf cart enjoying the beautiful scenery doing 20 mph when another gold cart is riding my tail and then passes me moving beyond the speed limit. We are retired what is the hurry? What would help is to reinforce the golf cart speed limit.

Bill1701 07-01-2019 07:32 AM

There are also those on the opposite end of the spectrum. They have nothing better to do than drive 5-10 mph under the limit and slow everyone else up. They wait and wait before making a turn when there is no traffic. They are the ones claiming they are just 'being safe.'

OrangeBlossomBaby 07-01-2019 07:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rzepecki (Post 1661302)
I was like you when I was working and am so glad retirement has given me the time to slow down and enjoy life and not get upset over every little thing. I had spent all my time under pressure, rushing and being upset. What a waste of time. So much better now.

I don't get upset by every little thing. I was expressing the other side of the argument that "I'M retired, therefore YOU should stop being in such a rush."

I am rarely in a rush because I start out early for everything to make sure I'm never late. Traffic happens though, and emergencies crop up. Life happens. Even if you start out early, sometimes - you end up late anyway.

Do you get upset when you have a doctor's appointment at 2pm, and since you're retired and not in a rush or under pressure, you waltz in around 2:40 and the doctor says you missed your appointment, he's booked for the rest of the day, and you'll be charged the $40 for a no-call-no-show and it'll be another 2 weeks before he can see you again?

Or - do you make sure to show up on time, and maybe even get annoyed if you give yourself plenty of time to get there promptly but someone ahead of you on the road is sight-seeing at 12MPH?

Most of the time, things are great, even for people who work. But sometimes, something outside our control causes us to be in a hurry. Perhaps you have forgotten about that. It doesn't mean we live stressful lives. It just means that during this short window of time every day, we need to be prompt.

It's called being considerate to others. If that's not a priority to you, awesome. Maybe I'll give up being considerate to others when I get old. I hope I don't though.

Topspinmo 07-01-2019 08:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bill1701 (Post 1661323)
There are also those on the opposite end of the spectrum. They have nothing better to do than drive 5-10 mph under the limit and slow everyone else up. They wait and wait before making a turn when there is no traffic. They are the ones claiming they are just 'being safe.'

Some of us will get old, not against the law driving under the speed limit only driving over it. Only on interstate freeways where there’s minimum speed limit. Nothing more obnoxious than some JO driving 30 mph over the speed limit weaving in and out of traffic like he’s nascar king.

IMO there should be hidden automatically ticketing cameras 📸. The day will come when insurance companies will be monitoring you driving habits and adjusting you rates, it already started with first the discount for are driving what they consider safely, then what do you think next?

Palstep05 07-01-2019 08:30 AM

Well said !!

Travelingal702 07-01-2019 08:55 AM

Well, we all know the world revolves around them, don't we???

BoatRatKat 07-01-2019 10:40 AM

As I read this post I noticed that both my legs were bouncing. I've done that my entire life but I never knew that I was actually irritating anyone. I walk fast too, I walk with a purpose and I sometimes wonder to myself how those that stroll through life ever arrive anywhere. I also notice the older gentlemen at that gym who sit on all the weight machines and then do absolutely nothing but converse with each other. It annoys me sometimes when I'm waiting to use the machines myself but then I think that perhaps they live alone and this is their only socialization of the day and I just go hop on the treadmill instead. I enjoy doing things and accomplishing what I set out to do. Type A...maybe but who cares? I don't think any of my behavior amounts to being rude though.

valleygirl1974 07-01-2019 10:55 AM

A view from the other side
 
Hi there Villagers! I'd like to give a little perspective from the other side of The Villages - those of us who still work and our time is not endless. We are not just a retirement community, we are a wonderful community of people who are 55 or older.

I travel out of the state most weeks for work and the only time I have to run errands is often on the weekends. So, I asked one of my great neighbors one Saturday when I ran into her in Bed, Bath & Beyond why she was shopping on a Saturday when she could go any day. Her response was that she didn't realize it was even Saturday. Ah, the life of a retired person, who I hope to be some day!!

The other thing I fail to understand, or have not experienced in other many places that I've lived (not an over 55 community) is why people travel as couples in the grocery store. Really, it takes 2 people to buy groceries? Colony Publix is a zoo during the day. I've learned over the 3 years we've lived here that the best time to go shop anywhere, with less traffic, is 7:00 pm. All the retired Villagers are either eating dinner, drinking, or home. I look forward to slowing down and relaxing when retired. Until then, I will continue to look hurried, because I am. Oh, and thank you for NOT honking, which seems to be a common thing here.

fitnessrs@aol.com 07-01-2019 01:16 PM

Couldn't agree more with Jazeula. As much as people may not like those that have somewhere to go or something to do, others don't appreciate those that are moving so slow that you can't get anywhere in a reasonable time.

Velvet 07-01-2019 01:31 PM

My observation in TV, you can’t walk to places you need to go, and there is no regular public transportation as there is in most cities. So if you are older, or ill, or on medication, or etc etc. no amount of some one rushing you is going to help. It’s like trying to get a toddler to run. They can’t, they are not going to. It is easier for the able bodied to make the adjustments.

I was prepared for this in TV, hubby was not. He is used to getting to places fast and on time. He went on Morse once when we got there, and on a few side streets and then never again. He always took the main arteries around TV until... one day he wanted to go to a Walmart. I suggested the north one I was used to. He dashed here and there quickly and we ended up at the one in Leesburg, parked next to the police cars in the Walmart parking lot. Well, we finished shopping but after that hubby was quite content with taking Village roads for the rest of our travels.

jebartle 07-01-2019 02:55 PM

My favorite, they pass 5 cars and we all arrive at the light together.

THUNDERCHIEF 07-01-2019 05:19 PM

I agree 100&


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