Starting a new village
 

In these trying times we need to have a new village devoted to people enjoying life.

As a result we are proud to announce Stu^s Village

We are planning on doing this a bit differently in our town.

For example we will ask Sumter County to pay for all of the roads and put in a golf course. After all they will be collecting taxes from our residents so why shouldnt they pick up the tab?

We are finalizing our amenities but open to suggestion.

Put commissioners in place that see thing your way.

I think a once-a-week free beer night at the Stu Village Town Square would be great.
Masks and socially distanced of course.

And I'd like to apply as the head of the gate guards. Entry by SunPass but we'll take cash too.

What are you going to do about dog poop?!?

Are you wanting to be the mayor of Stu-ville? Maybe Stu-ville Junction! Just don’t get Stu-ed in the village. Who is the deputy?

After further consideration we have made some decisions.

First we will not allow any dogs in the village but we will allow horses as long as they are trained. This is to not have any poop.

We will be taking applications for gate guards. We will charge admission but the guard will collect a commission to be handed to the head commissioner who will use it to make this a better place.

We will supply free beer as long as members bring it to the weekly meetings and make it available to the mayor who shall be elected by, well we will figure that out later.

Wow! Now I know our 3rd move will be to the Village of Stu. Since we won’t be able to keep our 2 dogs, we will get a support rooster instead. That way everyone will know it’s 5 am, time to rise and shine in Stu-ville. If someone else gets chickens, we can have fresh eggs plus more chickens. Then we can be known as the Key West Village of Stu.
Anyone have a 5 toed cat?

We will allow roosters along with chickens as long as the member pays a small registration fee and agrees to make fried chicken for the mayor at least once a week.

The committee is currently considering allowing dogs under a grandfather clause but that will entail a slightly larger registration fee.

I’d love to be an ambassador on Stu’s golf course. Heavy fines for littering cigarette butts in the tee boxes. Proceeds donated to charity.

Your new village will need legal counsel. Not sure how many toes this attorney/cat has but he seems technologically savvy enough to move us into the future
Kitten Zoom Filter Mishap - YouTube

Stu’s brilliant!

Stu's world
 

I would only consider if you assured me there would be a Margarita truck cruising the streets.
Pavlov for the bells!!

Can't wait to get Stu' d on Stu'sville.

I what if I trained my dog to think he was a horse? Or I could train him to never poop? Could he be be grand-mothered in? I think that would be Stu-pendous!

Dogs and Distillery
 

If you grandfather small dogs and the margarita truck we are in. I could contribute to developing a Stu's Place distillery. As long as the mayor and commissioners can sway the Feds to approve the distillery permit. This is a three fold improvement...distilled spirits, hand sanitizer, and eco friendly fuel for golf carts.

We would have made you chief ambassador but have run into a bit of a problem vis a vis golf.

Due to overwhelming demand we have run out of room for a championship golf course and we will do not do anything that would detract from the experience.

Therefore we have arranged that you can play golf at any course in the village. You will have to play at night though and we suggest using glow in the dark balls to help you see them.
We will sell them for a small charge and will not even ask you to pay green fees as who can see the green at night.'

The distillery is a bit much so we can not do that. Also cannot do the margarita truck but for a small fee you can have the margarita concession.

Upon further review we will allow your dog to audition for a role in our version of the Clydesdales.

Firewife
 

That was a great read... I love happy funny people..
Sign me up🙃💋

Will ex-NY-ers get free lake view lots?

We would need an indoor sports pool. And how about a clothing optional area for those who enjoy full body vitamin D therapy?

stu did you not have all of these things when you lived in brooklyn

I have no suggestions ... but where is the Villages of Stu?? I would like to buy a house... is it near the prison— or next to the highway? I dont want to buy one then find out it’s too loud and then have to complain to you to put up a wall or trees. Can you give me a open pasture with the horses??

Stu,
The new Stu-Village planning is hilarious!

Hmmm you would probably have to dig a big hole for a lake in your backyard.

sure, just cut down any trees that might be in your way - and don't tell anyone!

You can certainly have an indoor sports pool. Due to lack of room put it in your basement. Clothing optional would also be in your basement so as to save room.

You can certainly have a pasture for the horses. It will not be near the prison or highway but in a very quiet area.

For complaints you have to put it in writing in person to the committee. We have not yet decided if the committee will be meeting weekly or monthly or yearly.

It would be quite-a-sight.

I think it would be great to have an annual "Stu-Cruise". I will be happy to handle the booking.

While some of us (myself possibly included) might look better wearing a mask first we need to get the village up and running.

I actually like trees. Just not on my property.

Well, if you don’t have free shots of fireball cinnamon whiskey count me out!:) or we could have village of moonshiner’s. And course the village of rum runners next.

So....horses don't poop?

They will be trained to poop only in designated areas.

Please discuss with the asst commissioner in charge of the margarita concession.

Open carry, it cuts down on the nit picken

We had a meeting of the board of director in terms of the horses.

They will be allowed but if they poop in the wrong place their will be one less horse and at the communal dinner one might be seeing the other other white meat.

Horses poop huge poop. You need a big shovel to pick it up. Maybe Dogs could come if they wear diapers & are in a stroller. Otherwise no dog no me not that stu village is for me. I think I will be content with Brownwood Village Square & The Lofts. You can have the drunks, know it alls, party people & crazies it will make the rest of the Villages much nicer for the rest of us. You should have your Stu Villages south in the new areas so us oldies don't get in your way. Sounds like a good idea to me.

Yes, I will, those margarita needs to be spiked:icon_wink: