An Inquiry about Family Life
 

Greetings to all. It’s been a while since I’ve checked in last. But I have a question to ask. But first, our update..

After going through a LOT of “ups and downs” in the market, as well as finding a home, my partner Pat and I finally closed in on a home we really wanted to get. We almost had a home previously, but to make a very long story short that will be discussed later in another separate entry, we were not able to get it as we had thought. But through the grace of our real estate agent, we succeeded in finding the home we desired to live in for the rest of our existence!

Now to my question addressed to all...

As a couple over the age of sixty, we had discovered that we are of a couple that never had kids. This means that there are no kids of adult age within our family, which means that we do not have any grandkids. And from what I understand and according to information recently released by the US Census Bureau, only 20% of married couples age sixty and up are childless. And when I state “childless”, this means that kids were never part of the married couple’s family. In addition, my partner is an only child, while I have two siblings that never married (their choice) and thus, never had kids on their own! (No nieces and nephews within our immediate family either!!)

Are their any couples out there within The Villages who were always childless? Are we one of the few couples that never had kids/grandkids within our domain, and will never have kids/grandkids?

We stated what we wanted to express. Now you have the floor....

Congratulations
Who the hell would want to expose kids/grandkids into a world it is today.
We have one adopted son and daughter-in-law with no kids and I must say we're glad of it.

God bless the family's with young children and I hope they live long enough to live into old age.

I have a stepson, step grandson, son and first grandson in the oven popping out in September. I agree with you on your statement but here we go. Sure hope the baby formula crisis is over soon. Also thinking that boy will be getting homeschooled

First of all, congratulations on finding your home.
To answer your two questions:
Yes, of course there are others who are childless and hence grandchildless.

Not much in TV revolves around children and grandchildren. When you go to the square, or golf, or do whatever it is you do for activities and enjoyment in TV, whether or not the people around you have progeny won't matter much. Others may occasionally be unavailable because they are traveling or having visitors, but other than that, it won't matter.
We're all old. Not many of us have kids living with us.
I have played golf with guys for a few years, and only recently found out they do, or do not have kids. Never mattered, other than once in a while someone will say something like "I'm out next week. Kids are coming to visit"...that's about the extent of it.

Do you have a concern about this?

I echo your thoughts...for the original poster, if he/she is keeping statistics.

How is Terry doing?

100% child-free here. No grands, no kids. My husband has a niece but she's a married 40-something with no kids of her own and a business to run, so again, no "kids" in our family. Tons of cousins with kids and grands but they tend to do the "family with kids" stuff up north, I've never met any of the grands, and only know a very few of the second cousins or the "twice removed" folks.

My spouse and I never wanted them, my sister wanted but circumstances led to her being without. I think she misses it. I don't.

The upside, is I don't have to really care who gets the estate when I'm gone. Sister will take anything not nailed down, hubby gets the financials, probate can have the rest for all I'll care while I'm ashes in a jar.

Your choice of course but we love our kids and our grandkids and cannot imagine not having them in our life.

Consider yourself lucky in one way. We have more kids in our family than I can keep track of, and at least one of them seems to have a friggin birthday every month of the year. It’s like pulling teeth to get my wife to miss any birthday party or other family gathering. The kid thing makes it very difficult for us to spend extended periods of time at our Villages home. Why can’t we see them over the Fourth of July weekend and during the Christmas holidays and call that good enough?

No children or grandchildren, and we are very happy.

I chose not to have kids. Don't have the Mommy gene. I have never once been sorry for my choice. I really think ALOT of people regret their choice to have kids. Of course they will never admit it. Having kids TOTALLY changes your life. Thank God for the pill and tubal ligations. I gave myself one for my 31st birthday

We can't possibly offer any useful advice. A will will direct where you wish whatever you have to go to. Without a will, it goes to your closest heir. If, you prepare a will, money well spent you can be sure your spouse is taken care of. You can leave any remainder to a charity. There is no shortage of people who will be glad to take your money some honest, some not.

I'm racking my head to think if someone having kids has even been mentioned in passing by anyone I met in the past few years. Lots of folks have had "family coming into town", but that could literally be any relative. In my opinion, if talking about your kids is a reoccurring topic of conversation and you are more than 55+, you need a few more hobbies!

no immediate family, that is fine. But, you must have a trust here in Florida, not just a will. Now is the time, before you need one. You call Pat your partner. Not married? Protect your assets....both of you.

Also childless
 

My husband and I are also childless by choice. We have actually met quite a few other couples that are childless also. The subject doesn’t really come up very often. There are always some that like to talk about kids and grandkids but not the majority.

An illusion on your part. Having kids changes one’s life in amazing ways that one could never imagine otherwise. I’ve never met one person who regretted it.

Same
 

You are the same as people that don't bring their family here or visit them very often.

Childless here too, but my partner has a kid and 2 grandkids. They are his pride and joy. I've heard that grandchild to grandparent relationship is generally the best one of all and I believe it. I always enjoy hearing about other's visits with their kids or grandkids, but no one has ever asked me if I have kids in TV. Not a huge topic by any means.

I am your twin LOL no kids and ligation at 30! I have no regrets about not having children, nor does my husband. Call us selfish but we travel extensively and have a wonderful life. Upon our deaths, all monies go to charity. My only regret is that I am the youngest in my immediate family and I am the only one still alive.

Looks like my wife and I are on the other side as we have five sons and fifteen grandchildren. It is so rewarding to see these young people grow up and take their place in society. One son once asked me about having children, I told him it was the most important thing in my life and no job or amount of money was worth more. A co worker who was single once asked me if I considered getting frozen so that in the future , when they had a cure for what killed me, I could be thawed and cured. I just listed the names of my five sons and she was dumbfounded about what I was talking about. Another person said he listed the names of his sons. I then told her I am going into the future with all my sons and grandchildren. We just love our get togethers and we also have a one week reunion where we rent a big house to fit everyone in. On the other hand my brother has no children and is a skier and hang glider in Jackson Hole. He tells people he didn’t have to have any because his brother did more than his share! He does have a framed picture of all of our family from our last reunion on his desk. He loves it when my sons take their families out there to visit him. This is America, people are free to do what they want, but having children is the greatest joy of many people.

Not sure of the point being made :shocked:

We have friends who choose not to have children due to devastating health issues that would have been passed to child.

Friends who tried to have children, but never carried to viable life

Friends who’s child passed at a very young age, and choose not to try again

And some including 2 of our own children who chose not to have children. Both dedicated their life to teaching gifted, and autistic children.

One can choose happiness no matter what their life choice.

I have three children in their mid-thirties who live far away and show no signs of having children. The irony is that I have spent hundreds of hours on Ancestry tracing my family back over a thousand years, and I have many hundreds of family photos. But I will have no descendants who will care or remember.

No kids, by choice. Both parents were only children, so no aunts, uncles or cousins. One beloved brother who died last year. He had two kids, but one died by suicide 8 years ago. The other lives halfway across the country. We used to be close, but he has his own life now.

It's lonely having no blood family left. So, I've adopted my own chosen family, right down to four grandkids, who call me Grandma. And one loving woman who I've called "Mom" for many years.

No regrets not having children, but I do wish I had more than one blood relative.

I would think there are more childless people in the villages than the general population of the U.S.
I would love to live in the villages but grown children keep me in the cold North! I don’t regret having kids. They are our pride and joy. When we told them we were selling our house and moving, they both begged us to stay. They are married, childless, but love their Mom and Dad. They come over often and love us. People who completely genuinely love you are hard to come by! I’ll wear sweaters for that!

I have never had children. My first husband was the oldest of a large family and he was responsible for his siblings resulting in his feeling he already raised enough children. My second marriage was later in life so we never had children together. So, we are also a childless couple.

I come from a fairly large family (7 siblings). My husband has 3 brothers. We don’t have any kids by choice. On my side we have around 60 nieces/nephews (including great/great-great). On his side only 4. MANY years ago we stopped most of the large gatherings and gift giving. Exceptions might be a 1st birthday or other milestone. I do wonder what we’ll do later in life when we may need extra help. Guess we’ll see how much my favorite nieces really love us lol.

I'm sorry, but I have 2 children, 5 grandchildren and 6 great grandchildren and am PROUD OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Family life
 

Well said I agree I have 2 children and my husband has 3 we have 9 grand children and love them more than anything and love spending time with them I wish we could spend more time together but some live out of state I guess it is up to the person on what they think is important no amount of money would ever ever replace them I would never pick money a home in villages or any where else over my kids or grand kids

Guess we move in different circles.

Love our kids and grandkids and to us they make life so much better. Having our grandkids call us to talk to us is an awesome thing that people without kids will never understand.

However this is your choice.

My husband and I were 50 yo when we married for the first time so no kids or grands. I have one sister and he has one sister. One grand nephew and 2 grand nieces.

Not living in the Villages but my wife and I were just talking about this. Her father came from a family of 5 and one of her aunts never married or had kids and another aunt married but had no kids. She is from a family of 5 as well and 2 of her sisters are married but never had kids. We also have a daughter who is 30, never married but has one son. It is everywhere with people not have children for a million different reasons I would think. Enjoy your home and the Villages. Think ahead, if you don’t have anyone to leave the house to, think of a charity or the like. My wife’s uncle left a lot to St Judes.

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Same here