Talk of The Villages Florida

Talk of The Villages Florida (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/)
-   Just For Fun (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/just-fun-109/)
-   -   The Confession (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/just-fun-109/confession-338207/)

larbud 01-14-2023 09:12 PM

The Confession
 
An elderly Italian man who lived in rural Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:



"Father.. During World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So, I hid her in my attic."



The priest replied:



"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to confess that."



"There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favours. This happened several times a week and sometimes twice on Sundays."



The priest said, "That was a long time ago and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."



"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I do have one more question."



"And what is that?" asked the priest.



"Should I tell her the war is over?

Taltarzac725 01-14-2023 09:50 PM

Ouch.

RICH1 01-15-2023 05:47 AM

Not funny to those who lost Family !

Boomer 01-15-2023 07:50 AM

I think this one crosses the line, actually more than one line. . .

There are some things that should not be the stuff of jokes.

Boomer

ThirdOfFive 01-15-2023 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2175942)
I think this one crosses the line, actually more than one line. . .

There are some things that should not be the stuff of jokes.

Boomer

Our skins get progressively thinner and thinner.

Back in the day, just out of high school, I worked taconite plant construction on Minnesota's Mesabi Iron Range. Tough work but the pay was good and for a young buck just getting out into the real world it was great. As you can imagine the humor among the workers was as rough and ready as the workers themselves. Jokes that made the rounds then would never be told today (at least in some places). Much of the work force were "Bohunks"; Serbians, Slovenians, Croatians. Lots of Italians there too, only we never called them that. I was a Bohunk. A standard joke was "how do you tell the (Italians) from the Bohunks?" "Simple. The (Italians) were the guys in suits looking down into the pit. The Bohunks were the guys with shovels at the BOTTOM of the pit."

It was funny, and regardless of ethnicity we all laughed at it. No one felt put down, racially slammed, etc. The Professionally Offended didn't exist back then. Today? Odds are that the thinner-skinned folks would be offended, or at least think they should be offended, at the joke.

I don't necessarily think that represents progress.

bruce213 01-15-2023 09:12 AM

I laughed.

DonH57 01-15-2023 09:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bruce213 (Post 2176019)
I laughed.

I did too only because it reminded me of the one involving the Staten Island Ferry!:jester:

JMintzer 01-15-2023 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RICH1 (Post 2175900)
Not funny to those who lost Family !

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2175942)
I think this one crosses the line, actually more than one line. . .

There are some things that should not be the stuff of jokes.

Boomer

https://media4.giphy.com/media/whQCa...Ktq2HH/200.gif

Boomer 01-15-2023 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2175942)
I think this one crosses the line, actually more than one line. . .

There are some things that should not be the stuff of jokes.

Boomer




Quote:

Originally Posted by ThirdOfFive (Post 2176001)
Our skins get progressively thinner and thinner.

Back in the day, just out of high school, I worked taconite plant construction on Minnesota's Mesabi Iron Range. Tough work but the pay was good and for a young buck just getting out into the real world it was great. As you can imagine the humor among the workers was as rough and ready as the workers themselves. Jokes that made the rounds then would never be told today (at least in some places). Much of the work force were "Bohunks"; Serbians, Slovenians, Croatians. Lots of Italians there too, only we never called them that. I was a Bohunk. A standard joke was "how do you tell the (Italians) from the Bohunks?" "Simple. The (Italians) were the guys in suits looking down into the pit. The Bohunks were the guys with shovels at the BOTTOM of the pit."

It was funny, and regardless of ethnicity we all laughed at it. No one felt put down, racially slammed, etc. The Professionally Offended didn't exist back then. Today? Odds are that the thinner-skinned folks would be offended, or at least think they should be offended, at the joke.

I don't necessarily think that represents progress.


Nope. Not thin skinned. Also, not surprised that I was immediately categorized. I knew what the reaction would be when I wrote that post this morning.

Here’s the thing — the example given by the first one to take umbrage with me — and quoted here above — is not the same thing…….

Ethnic jokes have been a part of our American Melting Pot forever and those kinds of jokes can let us laugh at ourselves — and laugh with others…..

For instance:

All those “how many (whoever) to change a lightbulb” jokes are funny to me. Those can be ethnic jokes. They can also be religious denomination jokes or regional jokes or job jokes. All in fun.

Anyway, I am not thin skinned. But Holocaust jokes cross the line where I am concerned. And I feel the same way about Helen Keller jokes. (There is no lightness, no snappy comebacks, to such jokes.)

Hope that’s not too nuanced to be understood.

Boomer

Stu from NYC 01-15-2023 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2176197)
Nope. Not thin skinned. Also, not surprised that I was immediately categorized. I knew what the reaction would be when I wrote that post this morning.

Here’s the thing — the example given by the first one to take umbrage with me — and quoted here above — is not the same thing…….

Ethnic jokes have been a part of our American Melting Pot forever and those kinds of jokes can let us laugh at ourselves — and laugh with others…..

For instance:

All those “how many (whoever) to change a lightbulb” jokes are funny to me. Those can be ethnic jokes. They can also be religious denomination jokes or regional jokes or job jokes. All in fun.

Anyway, I am not thin skinned. But Holocaust jokes cross the line where I am concerned. And I feel the same way about Helen Keller jokes.

Hope that’s not too nuanced to be understood.

Boomer

I laughed when I first read it and after thinking about it, not at all something to make jokes about. Hope mods take it down.

ThirdOfFive 01-15-2023 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2176197)
Nope. Not thin skinned. Also, not surprised that I was immediately categorized. I knew what the reaction would be when I wrote that post this morning.

Here’s the thing — the example given by the first one to take umbrage with me — and quoted here above — is not the same thing…….

Ethnic jokes have been a part of our American Melting Pot forever and those kinds of jokes can let us laugh at ourselves — and laugh with others…..

For instance:

All those “how many (whoever) to change a lightbulb” jokes are funny to me. Those can be ethnic jokes. They can also be religious denomination jokes or regional jokes or job jokes. All in fun.

Anyway, I am not thin skinned. But Holocaust jokes cross the line where I am concerned. And I feel the same way about Helen Keller jokes. (There is no lightness, no snappy comebacks, to such jokes.)

Hope that’s not too nuanced to be understood.

Boomer

Trust me. The "nuance" is impossible to miss.

Smalley 01-15-2023 06:26 PM

Thanks for the funny stuff! Never heard that joke before.

Black Beauty 01-16-2023 07:17 AM

Having been to Confession many times, I can relate

DonnaNi4os 01-16-2023 07:55 AM

Why would you post that here?

defrey12 01-16-2023 08:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RICH1 (Post 2175900)
Not funny to those who lost Family !

It’s a joke…a bad joke…but a joke nonetheless. It’s not the world’s job to tiptoe around your triggers. We all lost someone.

markfrat 01-16-2023 08:09 AM

I had a belly laugh if you cant take a joke then just be quiet. The world is getting too liberal. soon we wont be able to have conversation. From what I'n seeing of the young people texting is the new wave of communication. Too bad they cant speak to each other.

RiderOnTheStorm 01-16-2023 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larbud (Post 2175871)
An elderly Italian man who lived in rural Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:



"Father.. During World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So, I hid her in my attic."



The priest replied:



"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to confess that."



"There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favours. This happened several times a week and sometimes twice on Sundays."



The priest said, "That was a long time ago and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."



"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I do have one more question."



"And what is that?" asked the priest.



"Should I tell her the war is over?


Very poor taste!

RiderOnTheStorm 01-16-2023 09:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larbud (Post 2175871)
An elderly Italian man who lived in rural Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:



"Father.. During World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So, I hid her in my attic."



The priest replied:



"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to confess that."



"There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favours. This happened several times a week and sometimes twice on Sundays."



The priest said, "That was a long time ago and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."



"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I do have one more question."



"And what is that?" asked the priest.



"Should I tell her the war is over?


Having grown up in a heavily conservative, deeply religious and widely accepting family in a well-integrated community, it has always been difficult for me to understand the broad claims of systemic racism that we have been hearing lately. However, it is posts like this (i.e. Jewish woman selling her body to protect her life), however innocent they may have been intended, that enable this type of insensitivity to bolster claims of nascent racism. Don't help to fuel these fires. Please think before acting.

Chamo 01-16-2023 11:52 AM

OMG people grow some thicker skin. It was a cute joke if you didn’t like it too bad.

GoneFishing 01-16-2023 12:29 PM

I enjoyed the joke. Thanks for sharing.

sdifede313@aol.com 01-16-2023 01:11 PM

The first thing to go in old age is, one’s sense of humor. 🤣

stargirl 01-16-2023 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larbud (Post 2175871)
An elderly Italian man who lived in rural Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said:



"Father.. During World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So, I hid her in my attic."



The priest replied:



"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to confess that."



"There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favours. This happened several times a week and sometimes twice on Sundays."



The priest said, "That was a long time ago and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."



"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I do have one more question."



"And what is that?" asked the priest.



"Should I tell her the war is over?

Lol, didn’t see that coming!

Kenswing 01-16-2023 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sdifede313@aol.com (Post 2176498)
The first thing to go in old age is, one’s sense of humor. 🤣

And since this was WWII the subjects of this joke would be close to 100 years old. I doubt there's much hanky panky going on at this point.

oldtimes 01-16-2023 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2175942)
I think this one crosses the line, actually more than one line. . .

There are some things that should not be the stuff of jokes.

Boomer

Tolerance:
the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.

Has been replaced with

Virtue Signaling:
the act or practice of conspicuously displaying one's awareness of and attentiveness to political issues, matters of social and racial justice, etc.

Mrs.Guy 01-16-2023 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oldtimes (Post 2176533)
Tolerance:
the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.

Has been replaced with

Virtue Signaling:
the act or practice of conspicuously displaying one's awareness of and attentiveness to political issues, matters of social and racial justice, etc.

:bowdown: Well said.

ThirdOfFive 01-16-2023 05:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kenswing (Post 2176511)
And since this was WWII the subjects of this joke would be close to 100 years old. I doubt there's much hanky panky going on at this point.

...Which, of course, is precisely what makes the joke funny.

richdell 01-16-2023 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sdifede313@aol.com (Post 2176498)
The first thing to go in old age is, one’s sense of humor. 🤣

I thought that was the second thing to go. ;)

RiderOnTheStorm 01-16-2023 05:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oldtimes (Post 2176533)
Tolerance:
the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.

Has been replaced with

Virtue Signaling:
the act or practice of conspicuously displaying one's awareness of and attentiveness to political issues, matters of social and racial justice, etc.


Respectfully, your point (above) suggests that it is OK to agree or disagree on whether or not the holocaust was a bad thing.I think this goes beyond "tolerance".

Nonetheless I will make you a deal: Share this "joke" with your Jewish friends. If they find it as humorous as some others do I will concede that I need a thicker skin.

oldtimes 01-16-2023 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RiderOnTheStorm (Post 2176551)
Respectfully, your point (above) suggests that it is OK to agree or disagree on whether or not the holocaust was a bad thing.I think this goes beyond "tolerance".

Nonetheless I will make you a deal: Share this "joke" with your Jewish friends. If they find it as humorous as some others do I will concede that I need a thicker skin.

When I read this the only thing I took from it was that it was a joke about a horny little man. The Holocaust never crossed my my mind until the thought police arrived.

JMintzer 01-16-2023 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RiderOnTheStorm (Post 2176551)
Respectfully, your point (above) suggests that it is OK to agree or disagree on whether or not the holocaust was a bad thing.I think this goes beyond "tolerance".

There is nothing in that joke that comes close to saying the holocaust was not a bad thing.

Quote:

Nonetheless I will make you a deal: Share this "joke" with your Jewish friends. If they find it as humorous as some others do I will concede that I need a thicker skin.
Exhibit A right here. 65 yo Jew here... I found the joke funny (albeit, not a knee slapper)...

I remember Joan Rivers' comments, when confronted about her "Holocaust Jokes". She had many and some made this one look like a "knock-knock joke"...

She stated that NOTHING was "out of bounds" when it came to humor. If people would groan at her concerts, she would double down and hit them with and even more outrageous joke...

She had Hitler Jokes, Concentration Camp jokes, Anne Frank jokes, even jokes about the Crematoriums!

When commenting on Heidi Klum's show stopping Oscars gold dress with a seriously plunging neckline, Rivers remarked Monday, “The last time a German looked this hot was when they were pushing Jews into the ovens.”

She even told a joke about he husband Edgar (who lost most of his family in the Holocaust), who lost a leg in Europe, fighting the Nazis. She said "Leaving his leg there was "littering", and That's Wrong!"

She said she told the joke to "shake people's memories"...

Here is an interesting article titled the "Schlemiel Theory" that may enlighten some:

Joan Rivers and Holocaust Humor | Schlemiel Theory

Boomer 01-16-2023 06:22 PM

Hahahahaha, this thread is speaking volumes. When I called out the first post, I knew what would happen.

I knew what I was setting up to get -- just a tedious litany of knee-jerk, pre-programmed reactions indicating no thought given to how this joke is different.

It's different! I tellya! It's different!

Now, I am being called a virtue signaler, on top of being called a liberal. (gasp) Oh my, my, my, I must take to my fainting couch and clutch my pearls. HAH!

Btw, speaking of pearls. . .I don't have time to cast any more right now.

Boomer (who is actually a common sense, moderate type -- an endangered species (sigh))

shut the front door 01-16-2023 06:31 PM

She was one of the greats. Got to see her in person a couple of times and she really opened the door for many great female comedians. Fortunately, this was long before virtue signaling became a spectator sport.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JMintzer (Post 2176556)
There is nothing in that joke that comes close to saying the holocaust was not a bad thing.



Exhibit A right here. 65 yo Jew here... I found the joke funny (albeit, not a knee slapper)...

I remember Joan Rivers' comments, when confronted about her "Holocaust Jokes". She had many and some made this one look like a "knock-knock joke"...

She stated that NOTHING was "out of bounds" when it came to humor. If people would groan at her concerts, she would double down and hit them with and even more outrageous joke...

She had Hitler Jokes, Concentration Camp jokes, Anne Frank jokes, even jokes about the Crematoriums!

When commenting on Heidi Klum's show stopping Oscars gold dress with a seriously plunging neckline, Rivers remarked Monday, “The last time a German looked this hot was when they were pushing Jews into the ovens.”

She even told a joke about he husband Edgar (who lost most of his family in the Holocaust), who lost a leg in Europe, fighting the Nazis. She said "Leaving his leg there was "littering", and That's Wrong!"

She said she told the joke to "shake people's memories"...

Here is an interesting article titled the "Schlemiel Theory" that may enlighten some:

Joan Rivers and Holocaust Humor | Schlemiel Theory


mikempp 01-17-2023 02:50 AM

Maybe you should have designated a safe space before you told the joke?

Bay Kid 01-17-2023 08:14 AM

Jokes are humor. Maybe people shouldn't read the jokes just in case you are offended.

JMintzer 01-17-2023 08:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2176558)
Hahahahaha, this thread is speaking volumes. When I called out the first post, I knew what would happen.

I knew what I was setting up to get -- just a tedious litany of knee-jerk, pre-programmed reactions indicating no thought given to how this joke is different.

It's different! I tellya! It's different!

Now, I am being called a virtue signaler, on top of being called a liberal. (gasp) Oh my, my, my, I must take to my fainting couch and clutch my pearls. HAH!

Btw, speaking of pearls. . .I don't have time to cast any more right now.

Boomer (who is actually a common sense, moderate type -- an endangered species (sigh))

No pearls to cast, but plenty to clutch it seems...

Chee-Chee 01-17-2023 10:00 AM

Are you kidding me!
 
Comedy is the last glimpse of free speech we have. It’s why I left teaching the university system. One of my classes was “Diversity in the School System”. In the course of 10 years, it went from the most enjoyable class to a nightmare.

We have had Holocaust, Hitler, murder jokes as long as I can remember.
By the way, I just got off the phone with one of my best friends by happens to be Jewish. She sent me an Italian joke last week. I told her this joke. She told me that’s sick while laughing. I expect to hear from her soon which a joke just as sick.

Whitley 01-17-2023 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oldtimes (Post 2176552)
When I read this the only thing I took from it was that it was a joke about a horny little man. The Holocaust never crossed my my mind until the thought police arrived.


I find your portrayal of the Italian as a little old horny man objectionable. That is xenophobic and I will throw in transphobic not because it makes any sense, but just because.

oldtimes 01-17-2023 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Whitley (Post 2176767)
I find your portrayal of the Italian as a little old horny man objectionable. That is xenophobic and I will throw in transphobic not because it makes any sense, but just because.

Well I will raise you homophobic and misogynistic for no reason at all

ThirdOfFive 01-17-2023 12:29 PM

Why not a "tasteless joke of the day" thread?

oldtimes 01-17-2023 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThirdOfFive (Post 2176781)
Why not a "tasteless joke of the day" thread?

Who would be the judge?


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:22 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Search Engine Optimisation provided by DragonByte SEO v2.0.32 (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2025 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.