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-   The Villages, Florida, General Discussion (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/villages-florida-general-discussion-73/)
-   -   Commitment Ceremony For New Villagers (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/villages-florida-general-discussion-73/commitment-ceremony-new-villagers-123376/)

TCLaD 08-08-2014 09:22 PM

Commitment Ceremony For New Villagers
 
There is a very nice couple that recently moved to the TV. His wife had died several years ago, she has been divorced for several years. They are very much in love however, there are extenuating personal reasons they cannot get married. Both are very active church goers with strong religious beliefs. They would like to find a pastor/minister that would perform what I believe they call a committal ceremony wherein they pledge their love to one another and to God without being officially married. Does anyone know of a minister/pastor that conducts such a ceremony or even if this type of ceremony exist? They are not familiar with Talk of the Villages and I offered to help them out on this forum.

redwitch 08-08-2014 11:56 PM

Check with SallyBow. She is a retired minister. If she can't help, she may know of someone who can.

I wish this couple the very best. I can't help but feel their love is already blessed.

bkcunningham1 08-09-2014 04:26 AM

I have a couple of friends in the same situation. She and her husband were married since she was 16. He died after a battle with cancer when she was in her-60s. She's found someone else to love and she doesn't want to give up her first husband's pension. She attends Norman Lee's church and he was willing to perform a commitment ceremony for her and her her new partner.

NORMAN LEE - CONTEMPORARY GOSPEL SINGER / SONGWRITER AND ENTERTAINER

The Garden - CHURCH

Penguin 08-09-2014 08:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TCLaD (Post 920590)
There is a very nice couple that recently moved to the TV. His wife had died several years ago, she has been divorced for several years. They are very much in love however, there are extenuating personal reasons they cannot get married. Both are very active church goers with strong religious beliefs. They would like to find a pastor/minister that would perform what I believe they call a committal ceremony wherein they pledge their love to one another and to God without being officially married. Does anyone know of a minister/pastor that conducts such a ceremony or even if this type of ceremony exist? They are not familiar with Talk of the Villages and I offered to help them out on this forum.

Why cant they together as a couple commit to each other. The two people professed their love for one another and to God, so why would they need a committal ceremony its between the two of them. And whats a pastor or minister have to do with it. Will they make the commitment official. Forget all the nonsense and wish them a happy and healthy life together.

ron122049 08-09-2014 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penguin (Post 920686)
Why cant they together as a couple commit to each other. The two people professed their love for one another and to God, so why would they need a committal ceremony its between the two of them. And whats a pastor or minister have to do with it. Will they make the commitment official. Forget all the nonsense and wish them a happy and healthy life together.

I totally agree with you. If they love each other then that is enough. IF they don't want to get married then they don't need a ceremony. Trying to make lemonaid out of lemons?

Halibut 08-09-2014 11:03 AM

Sorry, TCLaD, I don't know of a specific minister, but since it's not official, anyone could lead the ceremony, right? It wouldn't have to be in a church.

I can understand the couple wanting to solemnize and celebrate their union with a ceremony and gathering of friends and family. It's a public announcement that yes, we're together and "married" in our minds, not just "shacking up." I think it's sweet.

Barefoot 08-09-2014 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TCLaD (Post 920590)
There is a very nice couple that recently moved to the TV. His wife had died several years ago, she has been divorced for several years. They are very much in love however, there are extenuating personal reasons they cannot get married. Both are very active church goers with strong religious beliefs. They would like to find a pastor/minister that would perform what I believe they call a committal ceremony wherein they pledge their love to one another and to God without being officially married. Does anyone know of a minister/pastor that conducts such a ceremony or even if this type of ceremony exist? They are not familiar with Talk of the Villages and I offered to help them out on this forum.

Call Tom Wilt - 352-751-7378.
I think he'll be able to help this couple.
He can suggest some nice outdoor spots for the ceremony, or indoors.
If he is unable to perform a commitment ceremony,
I'm sure he can recommend someone appropriate.

Hearts and Flowers Wedding Ceremonies The Villages, FL - Wedding Officiant - Florida

JRichm369 08-09-2014 11:23 AM

My significant other lost her husband in 1999, I lost my wife of 39 years in 2002. She and I met August of 2004, and have been together since. Our financial advisers were adamant that we would suffer great additional expenses should we go through an official weding in the USA.

We were extremely fortunate to have found each other, we truly love each other and we will spend the rest of our lives together in The Villages.

Sandals, St. Lucia does do a very nice ceremony

maybe 08-09-2014 11:39 AM

It depends of course upon what is said at the ceremony, but it seems that what they want to do amounts to entering into a common law marriage. Most states, including Florida, no longer recognize new common law marriages, but some states still can, and I'd be a little concerned that somewhere, some time, someone might claim they are married. Nothing unusual about trying to have it both ways for one's own advantage, but the "system" sometimes reacts in a manner that surprises them.

gerryann 08-09-2014 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penguin (Post 920686)
Why cant they together as a couple commit to each other. The two people professed their love for one another and to God, so why would they need a committal ceremony its between the two of them. And whats a pastor or minister have to do with it. Will they make the commitment official. Forget all the nonsense and wish them a happy and healthy life together.

I couldn't disagree with you more. I think it is very sweet that they want to celebrate their union with a commitment ceremony with friends and family. You shouldn't call it nonsense if this is important to them, and something they wish to do for themselves.

Barefoot 08-09-2014 11:59 AM

The OP is looking for a suggestion on a pastor to perform a commitment ceremony, not a critique of the lifestyle choices this couple has made.
A commitment ceremony isn't nonsense to them, and that is what is important.

CFrance 08-09-2014 12:22 PM

One thing to be mindful of... Where I come from in MI, the pastors really wanted you to be committed to their church if you wanted them to perform a ceremony. They did not want to become known as "the marrying pastor," and some of them felt "used" when asked to perform ceremony for strangers, or even members' relatives who were visiting.

I'm not saying don't ask, but just be aware, or think about how you will ask.

rubicon 08-09-2014 12:45 PM

I hope to remember comments on this thread when a related subject shows up on this forum again

gerryann 08-09-2014 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubicon (Post 920788)
I hope to remember comments on this thread when a related subject shows up on this forum again

I'm sure you will.:rolleyes:

Barefoot 08-09-2014 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubicon (Post 920788)
I hope to remember comments on this thread when a related subject shows up on this forum again

I'm not sure what that means, but it sounds ominous. :22yikes:


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