I got a new invention, then again maybe I don't
 

I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings and I'm late for golf. I'll have a new invention by the time I come back.

uhh, did you say something?

I have a couple of friends that must already have them.

Worth listening to?

Already got one from Sams

WHAT IS IT? You've peaked my curiosity.

It was a pair of fake hearing aids. It would look perfectly normal to wear them around here. And if you want to ignore someone all you need to do is pretend the battery died.

Although I am a retired teacher, father and husband quite comfortable being ignored by all kinds of people.

We think alike. When I was in the military, I invented the two hats and two sets of keys gambit. I kept a spare cap and a set of keys that I had no idea what they fit in my desk drawer. I could boogie off to who knows where and leave the decoys on my desk. Here's how it worked.

The Colonel: Where's Chief?
Sgt So and So: He must be in the building, Sir. His hat and keys are here.
Colonel: Well, have him give me a call when he gets time.

I was working on the perpetually steaming coffee cup when I retired.

As for the hearing aid trick, I use that on telemarketers. I talk real loud and tell them I am going to get my hearing aid. Then I just go back to what I was doing until they get tired of waiting and hang up. Hopefully, this puts me on a "Waste of Time" list.

VillageChicken, congratulations you made my day.:a20::a20::a20:

This is terrible.

When I was a teacher and someone cornered me with a boring story or opinion. I would fake that I felt a sneeze coming, and say, "Wait here, I have to sneeze and I'll be right back".

I would never come back.

You ain't right. None of you.


Thank God.


Normal is overrated.