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-   -   What If Family Members Want Too Much from Retirees? (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/investment-talk-158/what-if-family-members-want-too-much-retirees-163143/)

Certified Financial Group 09-16-2015 10:44 PM

What If Family Members Want Too Much from Retirees?
 
Retirees face many financial pressures, but one can hit especially close to home: family members who want too much money from their aging parents.

Read the rest of the story.

rubicon 09-17-2015 06:12 AM

I get the gist of what the article wishes to emphasis and essentially agree to a point. However it depends on the surrounding circumstances.

There are ways to assist children in need and deal effectively and legally with the tax issues. Seniors can and do pass along funds by way of charitable gifts on an annual basis. Advancing inheritance in this manner transfers needed funds to children in their time of need.

Greg Nelson 09-17-2015 07:06 AM

Florida SKI vacation
 
spending kids inheritance..

stevebotts 09-17-2015 07:36 AM

I would love to know how many of us reading this post asked OUR aging parents for money.

manaboutown 09-17-2015 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevebotts (Post 1115273)
I would love to know how many of us reading this post asked OUR aging parents for money.

I ended up gifting my parents money but many of today's young adults seem to have an unwarranted sense of entitlement that the world owes them a fine lifestyle even if they choose not to work for it. What truly disgusts me is that I see demands for money "or you won't see the grandchildren" or other threats from some of the adult children among several families I know well.

The well to do particularly face a conundrum; they are dam*ed if they do and dam*d if they don't.

JoMar 09-17-2015 03:58 PM

As a friend told their kids, if, when we pass, there is any money left.....we screwed up.

justjim 09-17-2015 06:38 PM

If you have "more than enough", then gifting your children money to help with their education makes sense to me. What could you spend your money on that is more important? I've yet to see a Brinks truck following a hearst to the cemetery.

JGVillages 09-17-2015 07:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by manaboutown (Post 1115526)
I ended up gifting my parents money but many of today's young adults seem to have an unwarranted sense of entitlement that the world owes them a fine lifestyle even if they choose not to work for it. What truly disgusts me is that I see demands for money "or you won't see the grandchildren" or other threats from some of the adult children among several families I know well.

The well to do particularly face a conundrum; they are dam*ed if they do and dam*d if they don't.

If the children feel entitled or unreasonably demanding they probably raised to expect this when they leave the nest. If correct values are instilled as they mature the chances them aquiring this entitlement mentatlity should be minimal. Unfortunately our current government's attitude is to promote an entitlement attitude, which make the child rearing process that much more difficult.

manaboutown 09-17-2015 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JGVillages (Post 1115720)
If the children feel entitled or unreasonably demanding they probably raised to expect this when they leave the nest. If correct values are instilled as they mature the chances them aquiring this entitlement mentatlity should be minimal. Unfortunately our current government's attitude is to promote an entitlement attitude, which make the child rearing process that much more difficult.

The adult children I had in mind when I posted above were certainly raised well and provided with excellent role models, work ethics and morals. They simply turned out to be bad seed, got into some form of substance abuse and/or are just lazy and shiftless.

Happy Snowbird 09-18-2015 08:34 AM

Justjim....what is "more than enough"? So many kids now spend their $$ on wants rather than needs. If the last check I write doesn't bounce, I miscalculated. If you feel you have to "buy" your kids now what makes you think they will take care of you later? They will find you an affordable nursing home and be too busy to visit. My mother is in assisted living and during the 3 to 4 days a week I visit, I see very few other visitors----sad! I NEVER asked for $$.....I did without!!

GeoGeo 09-18-2015 09:29 AM

As an adult, I never asked my parents for money. I was taught to save for college at a very, very young age. So saving has been instilled in me. In fact, I bought my aging mother a freezer, etc. In my eyes it is the children's job to take care of the aging parents. Now my husband has the opposite situation. Adult son who at one time was asking for money every other week. My husband finally realized he would have no money left if he kept giving to him (plus it didn't teach the adult son to be responsible). We have a neighbor who has an adult kid who always wants money, too. Yet blows money on things he doesn't need. Kids today buy whatever they want and worry about paying for it later. I was taught to do without. Only buy it if you have the extra money for it.

TheVillageChicken 09-18-2015 09:46 AM

Both our kids are six figure earners and haven't asked us for money in twenty years. If they ever did, I would tell them to sell some of the expensive stuff they spoil their own kids with.

Miles42 10-04-2015 08:06 AM

My aging parents never had any money to give. In fact we used to supply them with some needed income. Also My children make more in wages than I ever did. So if there is a need it is due to mismanagement and poor planing. There is no way at our age we can afford to make up for their mistakes.


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