Pun Time
 

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Sorry, folks, but have a lot of pun today.

- What’s the worst thing about ancient orators? "The tend to Babylon."

- I wonder how letters ever get to the recipient. "The envelopes, after all, are stationery."

- Yesterday a clown held the door open for me. "I thought it was a nice jester."

- It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs "because they always take things literally."

- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. "It’s impossible to put down."