They won't let me work there anymore!
 

So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day......

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the heck would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'

So I replied, "No Ma'am. I'm neither blind nor stupid. I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice." "Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart!"

My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.

[QUOTE=gryoung;213920]So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day......

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the heck would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'

So I replied, "No Ma'am. I'm neither blind nor stupid. I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice." "Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart!"
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THIS OLD CLINKER HAS BEEN FLOATING AROUND ON THE INTERNET HOAXES FOR YEARS

[quote=scotsman;213934]I bet that I deleted that from my E-mail at least a dozen times. But it is still funny!

Guys, there's no question this joke's been around awhile but some of the old jokes are still just as funny the second, and the fifth time you hear them. Of course if you didn't see the humor the first time, the joke may not get any more funny the second time around.

George

I Laughed
 

Guess I missed this is it has been around awhile. I liked it, it made me laugh!

Thanks for my chuckle of the day.

I've just printed this out for my hubby to read. He most definitely would be able to relate to this, owning a retail establishment of his own.........and often having the same type stop in with their obnoxious children. He could write a book, believe me.

No matter whether this has been floating around in cyber space for eons, it is still good for a laugh.

I loved it. If I'd heard it, I forgot!
Of course, I can hide my own Easter eggs!

Wal-Mart greeter
 

True story:

I was westbound on I-24 out of Chattanooga one time and had a local station on my car radio. The disc jockey came out of a record and announced a contest.

She said, "The average age of workers in this job is 76," and started taking calls. After playing a record, she came back on and said "I've had 25 calls. You all said 'Wal-Mart greeter.' And you're all wrong."

Then she played another song and I'm getting further from town and afraid I'll lose the station before she gives the answer. She comes back in after the next record and says she has no winners; no one got it right.

The answer: Poll workers. But I liked the way everyone assumed they knew the only place that would hire people that age.

I've often said I've spent my life in jobs that provided needed services to the public, so in retirement, I want to be completely useless. I could sit in the park and feed the pigeons, but the pigeons would get something out of that.

No, I want to be really useless. I want to be a Wal-Mart greeter.

______________________

Gryoung: I never heard this one before. Gave me a good laugh. Have passed it on to my friends. Too bad some people have to turn everything into a negative.

ME too Jane.

I loved it.

Well we've never seen it before and enjoyed the laugh
 

[quote=scotsman;213934]Well we've never seen it before and enjoyed the laugh!:laugh::laugh::laugh:

I laughed the first time I heard it. I laughed the last time I heard it. Heck, in all the time I've been reading TOTV, I doubt there have been 10 jokes that I hadn't heard before. But that's okay.

Someone earlier, can't remember who, commented about a side effect of aging that strikes some of us. Something about Easter Eggs. Heck, I've been reading the same Agatha Christie novel for two years and I still can't believe all those nice people on the train killed that evil man. But, I do get to meet a lot of nice, new people. Anybody up for Murder She Wrote?




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Okay, before anyone jumps on my arse, I know Alzheimer’s disease is a deadly serious problem and is likely what I have feared the most if I should reach "old age." Scares the hell out of me to think that I would lose what I now consider such valuable and diverse memories. And I'm sure many of you have suffered or are now suffering through the disease with family or friends. But then I've always felt that if you can't laugh at life a bit and especially its biggest demons, then life is going to kick you in the butt real hard.

Sorry if anyone was offended :bowdown:


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The best thing about Alzheimer's is that you get to make new friends every day.

This is meant to be a joke.!!!!!!!!!! Duh