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misstozak 05-27-2011 10:26 PM

Sex and The Villages
 
What is it with men? How are they so very different from us women? No matter how sweet, how kind, how considerate, how mature or even how vulnerable they may be themselves. They just don’t seem to get it. Or do they?

Despite how independent a woman may appear or actually be, in our hearts we remain very vulnerable. We trust and we want to believe the sweet talkin’ guy. While we may no longer want a man to tell us where to hang the pictures on the wall we still want a man to tell us other things. And to mean what they tell us.

For instance, I really like you because…I find you attractive because…I am so happy I met you because…or just, simply, I love you.

I’m Janet Darling and I came here to The Villages not looking for a new love but escaping from an old one. I didn’t even think I’d want to look at another man again let alone do any kind of icky thing like touching one. Then, the miracle of chemistry took over.

I had joined Match.com a while back because, while I was not ready to meet someone new, I still didn’t want Mr. Right to pass me by in the unlikely event he existed. What a plethora of men there are out there! But did I want a long haired biker studded with tattoos or did I want some other kind of man? I chose another kind and I met him last Saturday night up at the Spanish Springs Town Square. I must confess, while I am not a cougar, I have him beat by almost 10 years.

Talk about being swept off my feet! A foot taller than me, handsome, charming and speaking a soft southern drawl all the while professing to be the real thing. Or, rather, the real “thang.” But is he really “real”? Carrie Bradshaw called her major romance “Big” but I think I’ll call my potential one “Cowboy.” And not just because of those great boots he was wearing but because the very next afternoon he brought over a huge porterhouse steak to grill on my barbie and all the fixins” to go with it. He was all smiles and a great chef and he knew exactly what he wanted and how to get it.

We spent a lot of time talking and a fair amount of time cooking and eating but some real quality time was spent kissing and enjoying those very first romantic moments. It wasn’t so icky after all considering I could hardly catch my breath. I feel in my heart that I am 18 years old again and also feel all the vulnerability that goes with it. In my head I realize that you should never rule out romance as a possibility no matter how old you get.

I hardly know this Cowboy, not even a week yet, but he’s got me going for sure. He texts, he calls, he wants to see me again. But does he know in his heart the fragility of mine? And how easily, or casually, it can be broken? Does he get it? Time will tell, ladies. As I am sure, you all know.

So I need a Samantha! I need a Miranda! And I need a Charlotte. I am certain The Villages has more than one of each of these beautiful, vibrant women. I would love to hear your stories and I will keep you posted on mine.

Freeda 05-28-2011 07:55 AM

Hi Janet What a great post. It will probably benefit alot of people. I would just say never give up on love; and you can't control when you will find it. I met my wonderful husband less than a month after filing for divorce,at a time when I just wanted to focus on friends, business and my children, and a man was the last thing I had on my mind.

From what I've heard from some of the best thinkers on the subject, wait three months before intimacy. After 3 months you start finding out a person's true self; and becoming intimate before then limits your objectivity. Anyone can be wonderful for three months

Uptown Girl 05-28-2011 08:40 AM

Okay, I'm sitting here making all kinds of faces, trying to figure out how to word this well. But in the meantime.......
How about if we move this to the feminine forum? Girl Talk?

I just tied my husband up so HE wouldn't respond to your post.

graciegirl 05-28-2011 09:05 AM

Janet. Darling, welcome to the forum. You will love posting on here. Had you posted before with another name because you seem so familiar with the process?

The people on here are very helpful and each has his or her own personality. There is a lot of sincere help, some friendly kidding and some not so friendly remarks.

I think I would hope that Janet Darling is not your real name, because it isn't a good idea to allow people too much information on this very public place. I am usually the great banner holder of "this world is a good and safe place in The Villages, but you really do need to be a little careful about what you say here...or any other public forum.

I am not single, nor am I your mother, nor am I an unfriendly person. I know that you will find all kinds of wonderful relationships on here and hopefully the good, dependable, nice and caring guy too. It is my view that guys aren't that much different than gals for the most part. They are people too.

Kindest wishes and a warm welcome.
Gracie

Uptown Girl 05-28-2011 09:35 AM

I apologize if I sounded less than gracious.... my brain went immediately to speed dial and I heard alarms in my head.
A belated welcome.....JD!

misstozak 05-28-2011 09:36 AM

Hi Graciegirl ~ Thank you for the warm wishes and welcome. Nope, Janet Darling is NOT my real name nor would I ever advertise my name publicly in a forum. I think I will take Uptown Girl's advice and move to a more feminine forum. Girl Talk? Is there a forum for that? Enjoy this beautiful weekend!
Janet

misstozak 05-28-2011 09:45 AM

Good morning Uptown Girl ~ I appreciate your words and will post my update in the feminine forum. I do believe, however, that it wouldn't hurt some singles of the male persuasion to know how they appear to us and what's going on in our minds. Maybe there are some who will straighten up and fly right!
Janet

misstozak 05-28-2011 09:46 AM

Thanks Freeda! Wishing you continued happiness!
Janet

pivo 06-14-2011 04:32 PM

Hey Uptown girl"" What did you do to hom after you
tied him up?

swrinfla 06-14-2011 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by misstozak (Post 357870)
I do believe, however, that it wouldn't hurt some singles of the male persuasion to know how they appear to us and what's going on in our minds.
Janet

Janet:

This male single (widowed over 11 years) hopes that you will realize that we are not all on the prowl!

Indeed, I am so much so NOT, that I studiously avoid singles gatherings, as my perception of them is less than flattering! :laugh:

All that said, I have several single female friends in TV who might perhaps agree with you. Still, we enjoy visiting together!

SWR
:beer3:

jebartle 06-14-2011 05:21 PM

We spent a lot of time talking and a fair amount of time cooking and eating but some real quality time was spent kissing and enjoying those very first romantic moments. It wasn’t so icky after all considering I could hardly catch my breath. I feel in my heart that I am 18 years old again and also feel all the vulnerability that goes with it. In my head I realize that you should never rule out romance as a possibility no matter how old you get.

I hardly know this Cowboy, not even a week yet, but he’s got me going for sure. He texts, he calls, he wants to see me again. But does he know in his heart the fragility of mine? And how easily, or casually, it can be broken? Does he get it? Time will tell, ladies. As I am sure, you all know.


Please Janet, don't move tooooo fast! There are a lot of gigolo's out there!
Of course I'm sitting pretty with a great guy (36 years of bleded wiss, I mean wedded bliss, tee hee).....When you say Time will Tell, hope you let this "Lone Ranger" wait a bit!:crap2::crap2:

2BNTV 06-14-2011 06:01 PM

........

Pturner 06-14-2011 07:58 PM

Hi Janet,
Welcome Daulin' (in mah best southern drawl).

Do you ever have that dream where you are at the mall and suddenly realize that you're nekkid. Just asking. :024:

FMF Doc 06-14-2011 09:26 PM

Please Janet, don't move tooooo fast! There are a lot of gigolo's out there!
Of course I'm sitting pretty with a great guy (36 years of bleded wiss, I mean wedded bliss, tee hee).....When you say Time will Tell, hope you let this "Lone Ranger" wait a bit!:crap2::crap2:[/QUOTE]


Wait a minute. I'm confused. You mean that Cowboy is really after her brother that helped her buy the place?

ConeyIsBabe 06-29-2011 04:15 PM

Janet ~~
 
I just stumbled upon this thread, today, with interest and curiosity. Now that approximately four weeks have elapsed since you first met "Cowboy" can give us an update ?

Wishing you the best ....


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