Talk of The Villages Florida

Talk of The Villages Florida (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/)
-   Singles (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/singles-124/)
-   -   Marriage, anyone? (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/singles-124/marriage-anyone-74835/)

chachacha 04-11-2013 08:22 PM

Marriage, anyone?
 
Is there anyone out there, male or female, who is interested in marrying again someday? I am about to give up on even trying to meet someone because almost everyone I talk to thinks it is absolutely ok to just have sex without marriage and why complicate your life? I have been in an unhappy marriage and if that were my only frame of reference, perhaps I would feel that way, too. But I have also been in a wonderfully happy marriage which only ended because of death, and I would wish that everyone could be so fortunate as to have an experience like that. This is similar to my post on celibate singles, but with the added question as to whether modern dating even pretends to lead to courtship and marriage or just goes directly to sex, do not pass go, do not collect your $200! Am I the only single person who would like to have a traditional courtship and marriage? While gays are clamoring for the right to marry, it seems many heterosexuals do not appreciate the meaning of the union.

Geewiz 04-11-2013 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chachacha (Post 657837)
Is there anyone out there, male or female, who is interested in marrying again someday? I am about to give up on even trying to meet someone because almost everyone I talk to thinks it is absolutely ok to just have sex without marriage and why complicate your life? I have been in an unhappy marriage and if that were my only frame of reference, perhaps I would feel that way, too. But I have also been in a wonderfully happy marriage which only ended because of death, and I would wish that everyone could be so fortunate as to have an experience like that. This is similar to my post on celibate singles, but with the added question as to whether modern dating even pretends to lead to courtship and marriage or just goes directly to sex, do not pass go, do not collect your $200! Am I the only single person who would like to have a traditional courtship and marriage? While gays are clamoring for the right to marry, it seems many heterosexuals do not appreciate the meaning of the union.

OK - for a good McCartney ticket consider us Gay lovers in Vermont...like Ellen and Portia....Rock and Sal Mineo....Oscar Wilde and Oscar Wilde. No sex....why should this be different than my 30 year marriage to Voldemort....

mainlander 04-11-2013 10:08 PM

An interviewer stopped a distinguished older gentleman on the street and asked: "If you could give just one piece of advice about life, what would it be?",, The gentleman replied with three words: "be in love" and he turned and walked away.

CFrance 04-11-2013 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geewiz (Post 657874)
OK - for a good McCartney ticket consider us Gay lovers in Vermont...like Ellen and Portia....Rock and Sal Mineo....Oscar Wilde and Oscar Wilde. No sex....why should this be different than my 30 year marriage to Voldemort....

I love Geewiz.:kiss:

Tom Hannon 04-11-2013 10:49 PM

On a serious note, Ive heard the complaint from many of my single female friends, in both TV and Long Island They tell me ""all the good ones are taken" but I'm sure there are other eligible men waiting for the someone special to enter their lives. It is a jungle out there and knowing Chachacha personally she is a good catch. You'd think at the ages of Village people , a guy wouldn't be as needy this point in their life.

As a matter of fact my neighbor (female) meet a great catch in The Villages and are getting married in a few days. She found her man. Im sure your knight in shinning amour will arrive. Just don't give out any free samples until that time. I wish i knew someone for you.

aussiemom 04-12-2013 06:55 AM

Many don't remarry for the reason of money............some will lose some or all of the retirement pensions/benefits they get if they remarry.

In awe of TV 04-12-2013 07:03 AM

Never give up!
 
I'm not necessary interested in getting married again, been there, done that, but I do hope to find someone I love being with, having fun, someone who I can share an intimate relationship, share our lives together and enjoy the simple pleasures of being in love for the rest of our lives.

I may be dreaming or asking for too much but I'm still holding out for it!

Never give up Cha. You have too much love to give and there will be someone to share it with.

graciegirl 04-12-2013 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CFrance (Post 657879)
I love Geewiz.:kiss:

Me too.

Chachacha.

I would marry you in a heartbeat if I weren't already married and very satisfied with being a heterosexual.Plus Sweetie is hard to follow.

You are pretty...no MORE than pretty,BEAUTIFUL, smart, tri lingual, social, kind, a good cook, VERY well read and truly spiritual person. Did I say SMART???

I could be your "Yenta." Can Catholic girls be Yentas???

Only suitable boys should apply. With money.

chachacha 04-12-2013 09:03 AM

gracie, i have been a successful yenta in several cases, but can't seem to match someone for myself! appreciate any help from gracie, tom or whoever....aussiemom, i am in that position with pension loss if i remarry but i still feel that marriage is the best way to really commit to another person and to feel at peace with my own spirit. (for me, not judging anyone else) someone kindly sent me a pm about e harmony! perhaps i will give that a go! keep the comments coming...there are many stories out there, i am sure.

manaboutown 04-12-2013 09:05 AM

Although I am enjoying my life as a single I would love to get married again. Even though my marriage was not all that wonderful I liked being married for many reasons. Unfortunately I have found it difficult to find just the right woman and like you, Cha x 3, have pretty much given up. Back in college and into my mid twenties, when I married, it was easy to meet potential mates and there were many opportunities and choices. Few had much of what we now refer to as baggage. Now we all do at this point in life, which is acceptable, if the situation is workable.

mainlander 04-12-2013 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aussiemom (Post 657948)
Many don't remarry for the reason of money............some will lose some or all of the retirement pensions/benefits they get if they remarry.

With all due respect. Does an accounting approach really qualify/diqualify the reasons for love a/o marriage? Perhaps a partial loss of one partners pension would be more than made up when the new spouses pension funds are added to the books. Would that result in twice as much love? I recently read an apt quote here just the other day which goes something like this,, "...after an hour with the right person, all of the 'must haves' go out the window".

skyguy79 04-12-2013 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chachacha (Post 658009)
gracie, i have been a successful yenta in several cases, but can't seem to match someone for myself! appreciate any help from gracie, tom or whoever....aussiemom, i am in that position with pension loss if i remarry but i still feel that marriage is the best way to really commit to another person and to feel at peace with my own spirit. (for me, not judging anyone else) someone kindly sent me a pm about e harmony! perhaps i will give that a go! keep the comments coming...there are many stories out there, i am sure.

This article is a little dated, but you might be interested in reading it:

Consumers Report - Internet dating services, online matchmaking

patfla06 04-12-2013 06:34 PM

I think a lot of people don't want to get legally entangled with someone.
Many want what they have left to go directly to their kids and grands.

One thing everyone should be aware of in Florida is what they call an
"Elective share" which entitles your spouse to one third of your
Estate. If you wish to remarry be smart and get that new spouse to
Opt out of being eligible for this share and other legal matters to be taken care of professionally by a lawyer.

I can see why after a happy marriage you would want to remarry.

CFrance 04-12-2013 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patfla06 (Post 658319)
I think a lot of people don't want to get legally entangled with someone.
Many want what they have left to go directly to their kids and grands.

One thing everyone should be aware of in Florida is what they call an
"Elective share" which entitles your spouse to one third of your
Estate. If you wish to remarry be smart and get that new spouse to
Opt out of being eligible for this share and other legal matters to be taken care of professionally by a lawyer.

I can see why after a happy marriage you would want to remarry.




Yes, but I could also see why you would want to keep your finances separate, to the benefit of both spouses' children. If that's not possible with a marriage in FL, that would really give me pause if I were in that situation. I fully expect our carefully earned assets to go to our children. If something happened and one of us died and a second marriage came up, I would be very sure the assets were protected for the children.

After all... I don't know how exactly to articulate this, but this is our first family's assets. I wouldn't want it to go anywhere else, nor would I went the spouse of a second marriage to dilute his assets either. A sticky situation.

rp001 04-12-2013 08:06 PM

In two years of single life in the villages I dated quite a few nice ladies...Unfortunately I never met one that had the same goals as me, to find someone to spend the rest of my life with..All the ladies I met were interested in staying single and some in enjoying an intimate relationship without commitment.. A mutual friend from Ft Lauderdale introduced me to a lovely lady from the Boca area...I am happily married now and sure this is the one I'll spend the rest of my days with. She is retiring next month and will be here permanently then. I do know a couple of folks that got married here but that does not seem to be the norm. I wish all my single friends the best of luck in whatever their wants may be.


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:40 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
Search Engine Optimisation provided by DragonByte SEO v2.0.32 (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2025 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.