[swrinfla]

BJ:

I sympathize no end. Unfortunately, I don't have any particular help for you, except to strongly suggest that you find tomorrow's (that is, Thu 10/2/08) Recreation News out of the Daily Sun and look for news of support group meetings. If nothing seems right in tomorrow's list, check each Thursday's paper as some meetings may be listed only the week before they actually meet! I have found a couple of support groups to help me with my medical afflictions, groups which are wonderful sources of support - and fun, too!

I wish you well, as I know other TOTVers will, too!



SWR

[BJ Spencer]

Thank you for your support.

[Cassie325]

BJ,

I would say that it is time to focus on you! I agree with swrinfla....get out the rec guide...pic some things to do and just show up....do what makes you happy...as long as mom is safe at home...leave her there...if not...then get those kids and family involved. If you don't want to do any of the activities listed....go for a walk....just walk until you gt your frustration out...go to the LifelongLearning College...learn something new....take up an old hobby and create a new one....

Have the family spend time with her while you are out! You can start looking for a new place for her to live...but it is difficult to do when someone is not willing to go or doesn't have the funds.

Is your husband willing to have a conversation with her...let her know it is unacceptable to speak to you in that manor....as it doesn't sound like you would be able to that on your own...

Also start practicing one liners when you are in the shower or in the mirror...by yourself....
if Mom says something negative....say "Thanks for your opinion Mom...but I don't need it right now"....or simply say " I am sorry YOU feel that way Mom..." say it everytime....
This way you are not validating what she says about YOU....you are simply putting it right back on her!


Your mother will not be here forever...and you want to be able to enjoy the time she is here...without wanting to kill her in the meantime....I honestly commend you for having her stay with you....this is very hard to do without emotional and physical support. There are some wonderful places for her to live....and you to visit....

You have to take care of yourself....physically and emotionally in order to care for anyone else....

Hang in there...reach out to us here at TOTV....come chat with us at night....sometimes it just helps to have a few crazy friends to talk to!! Lord knows we all need friends!!


Anway we are hear if you need us....keep us posted....

[BJ Spencer]

You have given me alot to think about, I thank you for that. I've already started doing some of what you have suggested. Also I got out the RecNews that was suggested earlier.