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-   The Villages, Florida, General Discussion (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/villages-florida-general-discussion-73/)
-   -   Lady Seeking Friendship (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/villages-florida-general-discussion-73/lady-seeking-friendship-325148/)

Toymeister 10-14-2021 06:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EdFNJ (Post 2017154)
What would one expect from a bunch of anonymous old folks sitting in front of their computers. 98% of the other threads here aren't any different.

What I expect, and you should expect, is posters have the same decorum that they would have to a stranger that they met on the street. That isn't too much to ask.

blueash 10-14-2021 07:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by manaboutown (Post 2017175)
The primary problem men who date postmenopausal women run across is this. Postmenopausal Atrophic Vaginitis: Symptoms, Treatments and Causes

So on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the OP has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if I disappear for a while.. you deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 08:15 AM

I approve this
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by blueash (Post 2017277)
so on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the op has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if i disappear for a while.. You deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.

post

LateBoomer 10-14-2021 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penglobal (Post 2016576)
As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. I have tried the normal avenues but the men that I have met appear immature, ALL looking for one thing and some men are viewing me as a "meal card", (male version of a gold-digger).

I'm seeking an unmarried gentlemen in his 60's for companionship, friendship and happy times. BTW - The gentlemen MOST be unmarried. Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

my guess is that single females probably outnumber single males here 4 to 1. Maybe more. and men if they are older, divorced or widowed and over 60 tend to want to go younger, not the same age or older. TV seems to be overwhelmingly couples anyway, and so I think it's gotta be a bit tough to be single here for either gender.

I think your odds are not good. but there are clubs. Tons. Singles events. Tons. get "out there". but keep your expectations reasonable - I mean, what do YOU bring to the table? unless you are perfect, drop-dead gorgeous, and without baggage, I think you have to make some compromises if you want "companionship". when you're over 60, everyone has baggage, and few are gorgeous. Men or women. Adjust your expectations to what this market will bear. I think it would be less frustrating. If I were single, I think I'd move from here. it's just too much of a couples atmosphere to find the density of older singles you'd want to find.

Boomer 10-14-2021 08:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueash (Post 2017277)
So on a thread about trying to find a decent man, we find a man about town who views women like buses to be ridden and where a lady's most important attribute is vaginal lubrication. Of course he will tell you he is a lady's man and not a misogynist. Only dates attractive women, although some have needed plastic surgery to make the grade, and while his brain seems not to have an edit button, his "equipment" sort of still works.

At least the OP has been able to cross one name off her list. I have been warned by the moderators not to direct comments at posters. So if I disappear for a while.. you deserve all the derision people have directed at you in the replies, and you might note that not a single person has come to your defense. That would be a clue for most people.


blueash,

You should not be benched.

I was too easy on the porcine-type behavior when I first tried to get my point across. I regret my dance with words. It did not work.

I had stupidly thought I might get an apology to the women here.

Then, yesterday evening when I took another look at the thread, I could not believe that other comment was actually happening.

I wanted to advise him, “Please stop digging. Please apologize for the first mistake and edit that last one out.”

But I did not. (The old high school, teacher in me often hangs on to a positive expectancy quotient and tries to redirect behavior without causing embarrassment to the individual. But, this is not high school — or is it?)

To manaboutown:

That got weird. Although we definitely do not always agree on issues in the news, I never thought you would dig in on crude behavior and then make things worse. The first one was asinine locker room behavior. The “medical” comment was weird and creepy. Maybe there was a cocktail or two involved. I do not know. But please make it go away so I can try to un-see it. Please do damage control. We do not need moderators involved. You have the opportunity to fix it. We’ll see.

Boomer

PS: blueash, there you have it. I was finally direct. If you are benched and I am not, I will sit on that bench beside you anyway.

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 08:46 AM

My father had been a paratrooper in WW2
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2017188)
Hey, charlieo1126,

I hope you do not mind if I ask you a question. (I think we know someone needs to do a change of subject.)

I realize this is completely unrelated to the thread topic, but I am curious about something you said somewhere around here.

Am I right that you were a paratrooper? And for a lot of years?

May I ask if you always knew you wanted to be airborne?

The reason I am asking is because I have a theory that people who fly — and jump — are born wanting to do that.

Mr. Boomer jumped out of perfectly good airplanes and helicopters, compliments of Uncle Sam. Now, he flies, but he does not jump out.

He loves everything to do with flying. Always has. And I would never clip his wings, as long as we are able to keep on.

When did you know that you wanted to be up there in the air?

Everyone I have ever asked that question of has told me that they always knew.

I hope I am not being too nosy. But when did you know the sky was calling to you? Was it always?

Thanks for putting up with my question.

Boomer

PS: When I heard the song “Me and the Sky” from the play, Come From Away, I knew I was not the only one who has this theory.

but there was more to it then that , I grew up in very tough neighborhood and got into very bad trouble with rival gang kids it was bad enough that I left the country at 15 and joined the French Foreign Legion , my lack of height 5ft 6 drove much of my decisions in my life , the Legion was elite the legions paratroops were the best and the First Foreign Parachute Battalion was the best of all and after 6 years fighting both in Vietnam in 1954 and then Algeria it was a natural progression to American Army as a para serving with different units both American and Vietnamese paratroopers in Nam and later as a civilian in Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos and another 30 years in most of hot spots in world, paratroops are the elite of every army in the world and I have quick way to sum up life I spent my whole life helping to keep bad governments in power or to put bad rebels into power that way it never made me crazy like the people in power I worked for , FYI I don’t own any guns and don’t see a need either and I believe that people given s chance can change I’m an example

Boomer 10-14-2021 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlieo1126@gmail.com (Post 2017338)
but there was more to it then that , I grew up in very tough neighborhood and got into very bad trouble with rival gang kids it was bad enough that I left the country at 15 and joined the French Foreign Legion , my lack of height 5ft 6 drove much of my decisions in my life , the Legion was elite the legions paratroops were the best and the First Foreign Parachute Battalion was the best of all and after 6 years fighting both in Vietnam in 1954 and then Algeria it was a natural progression to American Army as a para serving with different units both American and Vietnamese paratroopers in Nam and later as a civilian in Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos and another 30 years in most of hot spots in world, paratroops are the elite of every army in the world and I have quick way to sum up life I spent my whole life helping to keep bad governments in power or to put bad rebels into power that way it never made me crazy like the people in power I worked for , FYI I don’t own any guns and don’t see a need either and I believe that people given s chance can change I’m an example


Thank you for answering my question, charlieo. (I wanted to say that before this thread gets closed — although I hope it can continue. Like so many threads, this one is theater as characters — and character — are revealed.)

You come across in print as an interesting gentleman.

And thank you for coming to the defense of women.

You are obviously a secure male. As an aside, I sometimes tend to picture our anonymous posters through their words. (Such is the life of an English major.). Anyway, I always picture you as a man who owns his tux. :) )

Boomer

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 09:01 AM

That’s not really the reality of many
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by LateBoomer (Post 2017325)
my guess is that single females probably outnumber single males here 4 to 1. Maybe more. and men if they are older, divorced or widowed and over 60 tend to want to go younger, not the same age or older. TV seems to be overwhelmingly couples anyway, and so I think it's gotta be a bit tough to be single here for either gender.

I think your odds are not good. but there are clubs. Tons. Singles events. Tons. get "out there". but keep your expectations reasonable - I mean, what do YOU bring to the table? unless you are perfect, drop-dead gorgeous, and without baggage, I think you have to make some compromises if you want "companionship". when you're over 60, everyone has baggage, and few are gorgeous. Men or women. Adjust your expectations to what this market will bear. I think it would be less frustrating. If I were single, I think I'd move from here. it's just too much of a couples atmosphere to find the density of older singles you'd want to find.

woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

LateBoomer 10-14-2021 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlieo1126@gmail.com (Post 2017352)
woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

i never suggested otherwise. I think it's important that people are up front about what they want and don't want. It will avoid many problems. for either gender.

I think my only point is that TV is a tough place to be an older single woman given what are likely the demographics here and overwhelmingly couples-oriented sort of place.

so if she only wants companionship, say so. If she's uninterested in sex, say so. If she wants the man to pick up all the tabs, say so. if she expects a man to be financially secure (not sure how that plays into this if you are only seeking companionship), say so up front. most problems are solved. I just think the odds are not that great around here from mere observation. I have run into a lot of widows, but not too many single older men. but there are some out there of course.

again, I think a lot of dating issues are solved if people are honest about themselves, honest about what they want and don't want. that being said, people will misrepresent themselves in dating ads. it's the nature of the game. It's gotta be tough out there. I wouldn't want to be. but at these ages, everyone has baggage. Everyone has a past. just be honest!!

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 09:16 AM

Ha ha not now
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer (Post 2017348)
Thank you for answering my question, charlieo. (I wanted to say that before this thread gets closed — although I hope it can continue. Like so many threads, this one is theater as characters — and character — are revealed.)

You come across in print as an interesting gentleman.

And thank you for coming to the defense of women.

You are obviously a secure male. As an aside, I sometimes tend to picture our anonymous posters through their words. (Such is the life of an English major.). Anyway, I always picture you as a man who owns his tux. :) )

Boomer

but a closet full of Amani and Hugo Boss and never in shorts at night and I mean never , jeans or slacks and no flip
Flops or sandals just short boots or shoes and that’s the last of my story you get today lol the AC guy is here

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 09:21 AM

I’m sorry I didn’t mean answering y
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by LateBoomer (Post 2017359)
i never suggested otherwise. I think it's important that people are up front about what they want and don't want. It will avoid many problems. for either gender.

I think my only point is that TV is a tough place to be an older single woman given what are likely the demographics here and overwhelmingly couples-oriented sort of place.

so if she only wants companionship, say so. If she's uninterested in sex, say so. If she wants the man to pick up all the tabs, say so. if she expects a man to be financially secure (not sure how that plays into this if you are only seeking companionship), say so up front. most problems are solved. I just think the odds are not that great around here from mere observation. I have run into a lot of widows, but not too many single older men. but there are some out there of course.

again, I think a lot of dating issues are solved if people are honest about themselves, honest about what they want and don't want. that being said, people will misrepresent themselves in dating ads. it's the nature of the game. It's gotta be tough out there. I wouldn't want to be. but at these ages, everyone has baggage. Everyone has a past. just be honest!!

Your post in a negative way I just meant there are many comfortable singles of both sexes here

LateBoomer 10-14-2021 09:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlieo1126@gmail.com (Post 2017362)
Your post in a negative way I just meant there are many comfortable singles of both sexes here

I have no doubt that there are.

but the OP isn't apparently one of them. which is the basis of my responses. if people are thrilled being alone, more power to them! I just think it's gotta be hard in TV for those that are looking for marriage again, that's all. either gender. chill. nobody is doubting your happiness. I promise.

Velvet 10-14-2021 09:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by charlieo1126@gmail.com (Post 2017352)
woman here , I know many woman here who live very independently they date but they are not out looking for mr right all the time if something did happen well so be it , but many love there homes there friends nice cars and not having to answer to anyone , I myself am I very social person but love living alone , solitude when you want it is a very nice thing , especially when your sitting on the lanai with Miles and Coltrane smoking some weed lol

For some reason, I guessed your gender correctly. You just sound like you are a strong happy female to me.

I guess it hurts us, any one of us, who feels put down. We all look for that sense of validation. It is best if it can come from inside of one self and not from others.

D.Bolen 10-14-2021 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Penglobal (Post 2016576)
As a newbie single lady, I'm just getting my feet wet here in The Villages and have been looking for male companionship. . . . . Do you guys have any suggestions? Thanks !

Penglobal, if there's a chance any TOTV participants might fit the bill, you might try adding a flattering photo (but one that accurately represents your appearance at your present age) to a new profile for yourself, and then participating in TOTV discussions on topics that interest you.

I think you would find that any men who are intrigued by your comments and appearance will begin to respond to your posts, which may open the way for private messages between the two of you, and who knows . . . ? I'm sure you have seen that some ladies and gents on this site do have their photos attached, so yours would not stick out like a sore thumb.

If you choose to do that, however, unless you want your photos showing up on this current thread, you would want to cease membership as "Penglobal" and create a new name and profile. If you posted a photo to your present profile, I believe it would now attach itself to all your previous posts, including those on this thread. If you would not mind that, just add your photo to your current profile.

charlieo1126@gmail.com 10-14-2021 09:39 AM

I suspect from some first hand knowledge and just speculation that many of the marriages here come from the need for financial security for both sexes and more so for men , many here are used to 2 incomes the loss whether divorce or death can cause problems , 2 can live better then one here and I also can see that the more financially secure a person is the more chance they will be comfortable single and again there are lots of single woman and men here and many other places that are very happy


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