I don't think you should be trounced for any opinion. Yes, there are many ways to look at everything. Maybe we should put a sign on his wheelchair saying "I just want to enjoy the music, and go talk to my mom". He likes his little feeling of being in charge.

I am angry and sad this happened to you and yours. Everyone knows except this imbecile, that you are great parents to Patrick and devout your lives, to his care.

I wish I were there as I would have questioned his right, to make such rude statements.

The Villages idiot, at work!

I hope he does see this on TOTV and realizes how inappropriate his conduct, was.

GOD bless you Connie. It takes a special person to do what you do, everyday.

Nor can you fix stupid!! I am glad your son enjoys the entertainment. If that a** would have thought long enough about it maybe he could have figured out why you do things the way you do.

Open mouth, insert foot!!

It saddens me to hear this, as well as the details of the incident you described in your OP. I hope you can see and hear the support and love toward you and your son from those on this forum. You are to be admired for your devotion to him, not admonished by someone who has no idea what they are talking about. How sad that someone could be so thoughtless. :ohdear: You, on the other hand, handled it with grace.

I am pretty sure this rude idiot might read TOTV and he might also be a poster on the political forum! Sorry there are so many idiots out there and that a few even live in TV...

I am sure this song has special meaning for you, Connie. It always makes me cry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJAKmWAIKcY

I have been watching this thread all day. The more I read , the more I believe Connie was too kind in setting the title. It should say "a terribly rotten person was nasty tonight." That's probably the nicest I could say about the person involved. To Connie - a special reward awaits you and your husband, as well as Patrick. As you can tell there are many responders who love your family. We have your back in more ways than one.

I am so sorry for you to have been treated so rudely.

Cannot imagine what this imbecile was thinking speaking to you
like that.

He is just a bully and an ignorant one at that.

When I read that, I thought how grand that her son has this little window of time without mommy and daddy right there, but still he was safe. He's a grown man, a music lover. Why can't he have some sort of alone time? I think his folks are exceptional human beings and so is he!

Sad to hear this Connie. I happen to think you are such a wonderful person and a fabulous mother. Don't ever let anyone make you feel any less than fabulous!

A performer's perspective...
 

I would like to share with you, I just registered on the page and your story was the first one I read and it definitely struck a cord with me. I am also in my late 30's (39) and actually am technically disabled as well. I have seizures, so not as obvious as a wheelchair - but still.
Another thing, ironically, I am a performer. I was in a small production here in the villages a few months ago "Montana: No Fracking Way!" just as a chorus member, and just got cast in a new production "Man of La Mancha". Anyone who comes to see a performer, that performer appreciates, even needs in their heart, and to see a reaction from the audience is their "bread, butter, and the whole sandwich". The performer gets more excited and into the show when the audience reacts well that night - laughing at the right times, clapping at the right times. There have been lots of times when you compare one night to the other and say this one is a "bad/dry audience". Every performer who ever saw your son clapping and getting into the performance would have gone up to this guy and asked him to leave!! Demanded it!! It would be one less in the audience, but if their is someone ruining the event for others, its worth it!

I do hope you did not have to sit far away from your son. Sharing the experience together is half the fun!! Talking about how one guy was funny, one girl is wearing a weird dress, things that make you laugh!

Big hugs! From every performer you have seen and will see!!:bigbow:

Let it roll right off your shoulders and pay no attention. Not worth getting upset over.

That man needs to be slapped with a Rudeler!!!

Welcome to TOTV. What a nice start to your stay on here.

That's how you see it, and that's fine. I was just providing the OP with a possible explanation why this man may have felt inclined to make any comment to her. I really don't know what was in the heart of the man. Maybe instead of attacking the man with snarky insults, posters should recommend an appropriate response such as "oh, why do you think it is rude of me, sir?" Then if he tells her he thought it was unsafe to leave a vulnerable handicapped person alone in such a crowded venue, she could have responded appropriately. I'm not defending this guy. I just don't know what was in his heart. We all have said things that didn't come out like we meant, and maybe this was the case here. We all have witnessed behaviors or circumstances that we initially thought was one thing, and then learned it was completely different from our initial perception. A man spanking a child, for instance. But maybe the child just ran across a busy street and the man, his father, was so terrified all he could do was spank him out of fear for his safety and love for him. At first, it looks like an angry man beating his kid; later, with all the facts, it looks like a father terrified for his child's safety and trying to make sure it never happens again.

Please don't let the rudeness of one person hurt you. Your son has every right to enjoy the entertainment and I sincerely hope that you never encounter this again. America's Friendliest Home Town is sorry for your encounter.

I was going to yell at you but I reread it twice and I get what you are saying.

I know Connie and her family. I understand as much as a person who is not living her life day to day can understand. I honor her and love her and her equally devoted husband for showing us what unconditional love is.

I know first hand the mistakes that a parent of a handicapped child can make. Always walking between the lines of too much and too little help and protection and trying to get it right so your child feels some level of freedom to feel just like other people.

I have had well meaning people offer all kinds of suggestions to do something we tried and it didn't work years ago. Most of us with normal children struggle to do the right thing and usually get it right but not always.

At the very least. It was NONE of his business and Patrick was safe with hundreds of eyes who saw him nightly and would never allow harm to come to him.

It is just common sense, and common courtesy to hold your tongue sometimes. I don't know how that guy got to be a senior citizen without knowing someone first hand in a very similar situation and because of that developing a little.....respect? restraint?.

We are all peddling as fast as we can. We need to learn from each other.

I hear you. You are possibly coming from a different perspective than this man? with both of you having different life experiences. But I am concerned that so many resort to the "none of your business" position. I believe it is everyone's business to get involved with what may be abuse, neglect, alcoholism, bad behavior, depression, etc. I am not saying that the OP was doing anything wrong. In fact, it sounds like she is very caring and was not neglectful, etc. But we should all make it our business. I bristle at the frequent smart phone videos of bystanders videoing a victim getting abused or beaten by a bully or group of people, instead of calling 911 or trying to intervene in some way. How many people have committed suicide because people minded their own business instead of trying to help those people. Yet, when someone does interject, the first thing that others say is "mind your own business".

Let him walk a mile in your shoes and maybe he will feel differently. I am sorry you had this experience in the Villages.

Thank you ! Thank you! Thank you! It's great to get a performer's opinion!

Thank you for your opinion. I am the original poster, and I appreciate all the ideas posted. I didn't tell the man to mind his own business, actually I realized that he thought I was neglecting my disabled person. But if he had waited or had seen my husband and I taking care of him, he would have known that my son prefers to sit close to the band so he can see them. I just think he thought that it wasn't right to sit there, instead of out in the audience.

Dear Gracie, thank you again. I think this episode has really opened people's eyes to the different types of human beings living here in The Villages. And I have always felt safe here, whether I am alone with my son, or when he is with both my husband and I.

Love the Villages and the Villagers!

odd thing
 

Based on your posts, I knew/assumed you didn't tell the man to mind his own business. I gathered you were rather stunned at the time, and therefore speechless, as I would have been. I was really referring to the posters that were saying to "mind his own business". It's interesting that you stated you realized he thought you were neglecting your son, which is really what I was saying all along. Don't get me wrong. I don't think you were neglecting your son. I just thought maybe the man only approached you out of concern for your son. Most posters overwhelmingly jumped to the conclusion that this man was just being mean and attacked you because your son was placed close to the stage. Could he have waited to see you care for your son? Yes. But none of us are perfect. At least, if indeed he was watching out for your son, he did get involved, although, maybe not in the most tactful way. BTW, when did you come to the realization that the man was just concerned about your son being neglected? Just curious.

I'm not so sure I buy this argument. Look at the OP---"A man came up to me and said that he had been told by other people and entertainers that they think it's rude for me to put him by the stage and just leave him there."

He did not say he was concerned for Patrick's safety since he saw him sitting there alone. He did not say HE was concerned at all. He stated "other people and entertainers" thought it was RUDE. This seems to have quite a different connotation that simply a concerned individual with a poor choice of words

That's where the part about not being tactful comes into play.

Totally agree...none of his business. It amazes me how some folks feel they're the moral compass for others. As adults we know there are times stepping in is necessary. This wasn't one of them. I'm so over people like this! I don't know that I could have responded any better than the OP...than again I have not had medical intervention for my menopause symptoms so anything is possible. :1rotfl:

:1rotfl:

Whatever his intentions were, his words and manner left a lot to be desired.

I proper concerned response was not expressed. IMHO

Maybe he should check his own moral compass! It seems out of whack to me. :D

It says a lot about the readers on this site who were so thoughtful to take the time to share their views and general disgust of the treatment to Connie's son . It is heartwarming to read that people care and support each other . Bravo !

Connie,
UNFORTUNATELY, The Villages is home to some people who despite all the activities here have nothing better to do than BITCH & COMPLAIN about things that are none of their business. I too recently received an anonymous complaint delivered by the sheriff about something that was none of anyone else's business. People who make anonymous complaints are COWARDS!

Care to elucidate regarding the complaint that involved the law showing up at your door??

Well, I actually don't think he thought that. I think he just didn't like seeing the wheelchair up next to the stage. He said it was rude.

Connie. I just love you to pieces.

I am sorry that this happened, I hope you do not let this stop you and Patrick from enjoying the music.
Here is a thought instead of a sign that says I am here for the music.
Have a sign that says my name is Patrick I am here to enjoy the music,
and all the people here who support you and Patrick.

Have a sign that says "We are here with Patrick ! "

That way no one has to fill in try you thoughts

It may be hard to believe, but I am furious that this happened to you. That man displayed unexcusable behavior.

In retrospect, you should have told him it was none of his business or whatever thoughts you were thinking, but squelched. You would have been no less the lady you are. Sometimes stupid people need to be put in their place.

Connie just put it off that the guy was a complete idiot.He really had some nerve.Lucky I wasn`t in ear shot because I would have told the guy to stick it where the sun don`t shine.Just keep doing what your doing and let your son have his fun with the music.

OK. That was confusing.

Things are often confusing in this life.
 

Welcome to Holland

Wow. Beautiful.

That is so cool, Gracie! I must share that with some friends and family members who are involved with special needs and/or disabled children. What a beautiful way to view it!