[Polar Bear]

Not sure that's a good title. But I'm wondering about something...

My in-laws are in their mid-80's. They are pretty healthy for that age, but of course they are a bit transportation limited and have other constraints that come with age. We are in the middle of thinking about the next stage of their life. They're still living in the house they've lived for a very long time, and it's becoming more and more difficult for them to live there without assistance.

We're considering all the usual options. And one option we'd like to include in those considerations is sharing a house with them. One that would provide significant separation...their space and our space. But yet it wouldn't need to be two totally separate residences. It wouldn't need two full kitchens for example.

Do houses like that...or houses that could be fairly easily modified to be like that...even exist in TV?

And please don't use this thread to warn about the dangers of sharing a house with relatives. We're very aware of the seriousness of such an endeavor. We all get along very well. But of course we would still consider such issues and be duly cautious.

At this point, I'm simply exploring whether or not this alternative is even possible in TV.

Thanks for your input.

[Wiotte]

Originally Posted by Polar Bear

Not sure that's a good title. But I'm wondering about something...



My in-laws are in their mid-80's. They are pretty healthy for that age, but of course they are a bit transportation limited and have other constraints that come with age. We are in the middle of thinking about the next stage of their life. They're still living in the house they've lived for a very long time, and it's becoming more and more difficult for them to live there without assistance.



We're considering all the usual options. And one option we'd like to include in those considerations is sharing a house with them. One that would provide significant separation...their space and our space. But yet it wouldn't need to be two totally separate residences. It wouldn't need two full kitchens for example.



Do houses like that...or houses that could be fairly easily modified to be like that...even exist in TV?



And please don't use this thread to warn about the dangers of sharing a house with relatives. We're very aware of the seriousness of such an endeavor. We all get along very well. But of course we would still consider such issues and be duly cautious.



At this point, I'm simply exploring whether or not this alternative is even possible in TV.



Thanks for your input.

There is a fairly new model with two identical master bedroom w/ en suites. Don’t remember the model name but I’m sure a Villages agent can tell you. It is a designer. Master in the front and the other in the back of the house.


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[redwitch]

I think some premiers come with two master suites but won’t swear to it. Many of the larger designer models are set with the master bedroom on one side and the guest bedroom/den on the opposite side with a pocket door to give it a true suite feeling. So, the simple answer is yes.

It’s not always easy to live with relatives, especially parents who are becoming dependent on you but the rewards can be great. My mother lived with me the last ten years of her life. We had our issues at times but I wouldn’t trade one of that time for my privacy. We got to know and love each other as people not just as family. So, blessings to you for considering this route.

[Dan9871]

From what you are saying sharing a kitchen is ok but sharing a living room is not. Some of the Premiere's have a living room the is completely separate from the nook/family room. And that living room has a bath that is, in effect, part of it.

On this home it's not that hard to visualize an in-law suite with it's own bath and living room...

Homefinder - The Villages(R) Homes and Villas for Sale

If there the lot is big enough you could add a reasonably good sized living room to a designer. One of our neighbors did that.

[Sandtrap328]

One major thing to know - does your father-in- law play poker better than you? Does he know how to pull the winning card as the last card when he is the dealer?

Seriously, I would think with minimal modifications, a 3 bedroom house could be made into 2 separate living spaces.

However, from a realistic point of view, that is taking on a whole lot of "togetherness" you thought you had gotten away from now that the boys are independent on their own.

There can be too much of being super-nice people (as the Polar Bear and Mrs. Bear are). Yes, these are your wife's parents BUT you do have to think of yourself and how much or less harmony/long term happiness such a move would make for you, Mrs. Bear or the in-laws.

[manaboutown]

My brother took in his mother-in-law from Hell after his father-in-law died. Although after awhile they found a rest home for her it did not work out and she moved back in with them and lived with him and his wife until she finally died at age 98! How he did it I don't know but he is younger and weighs far less than I do and exercises far more yet has been on high blood pressure meds (which I don't need) he had to start when she was living with him. There can be a price to pay in more ways than one if things get stressful.

[jojo]

There was a beautiful home for sale in Amelia with an in-law suite. I don't think it's with The Villages. I think it's still for sale. My mother has lived with us for nine years and we are doing fine.

[jnieman]

Originally Posted by Polar Bear

Not sure that's a good title. But I'm wondering about something...

My in-laws are in their mid-80's. They are pretty healthy for that age, but of course they are a bit transportation limited and have other constraints that come with age. We are in the middle of thinking about the next stage of their life. They're still living in the house they've lived for a very long time, and it's becoming more and more difficult for them to live there without assistance.

We're considering all the usual options. And one option we'd like to include in those considerations is sharing a house with them. One that would provide significant separation...their space and our space. But yet it wouldn't need to be two totally separate residences. It wouldn't need two full kitchens for example.

Do houses like that...or houses that could be fairly easily modified to be like that...even exist in TV?

And please don't use this thread to warn about the dangers of sharing a house with relatives. We're very aware of the seriousness of such an endeavor. We all get along very well. But of course we would still consider such issues and be duly cautious.

At this point, I'm simply exploring whether or not this alternative is even possible in TV.

Thanks for your input.

I think pretty much any house here will work that has a split floor plan. The parents have two of the bedrooms. One for a bedroom and the other they use as their living room. The bigger the better but even for as small as a bouginvilla it would work. Would work much better if there were four bedrooms or an added enclosed lanai. I presently have my office off to the side in our enclosed lanai. Plus I have a couch, TV in that room. We also have our living room with the big TV and couch and chairs. The stickler would be sharing the kitchen but if they mostly don't cook anyway it wouldn't be an issue.

[Abby10]

The separate closed off guest suites in some of the designer models (Gardenia, Begonia, Lilac, Iris) would work if you don't mind giving up the 3rd bedroom as a living area for your in-laws. That way they have a bedroom, bath and living area totally separate and private from your area.

Besides the Zinnia, there are quite a few new designer models with 3BR/3BA available now, especially if you have other guests coming throughout the year where the 3rd full bath would come in handy. If you haven't looked in awhile, there are a lot more options out there now than there used to be.

Just one more thing - you mentioned you didn't necessarily need a separate house for them, but if you decide to consider that route, a patio villa neighborhood near you could be an ideal situation. I know other Villagers who have brought their parent(s) down and settled them in a patio villa in the village where they live. It has worked out well for them. But only you know, of course, if that would work in your situation.

Wishing you all the best in your decisions regarding this situation.

[Allegiance]

It's a wonderful thing to consider.

[kansasr]

I have been going to some open houses because of a similar need - moving an elderly parent into our home. There are a couple of models that I saw that would work nicely, Avalon (currently I don't see any listed on thevillages.com) and the Manatee (one listing Homefinder - The Villages(R) Homes and Villas for Sale). Using the extra bedroom that's near the bedroom makes for a possible 2nd living/tv/office room.

So yes, there are options around here, although they are becoming more limited all the time, until development begins south of FL-44.

[dirtbanker]

Originally Posted by Polar Bear

Not sure that's a good title. But I'm wondering about something...

My in-laws are in their mid-80's. They are pretty healthy for that age, but of course they are a bit transportation limited and have other constraints that come with age. We are in the middle of thinking about the next stage of their life. They're still living in the house they've lived for a very long time, and it's becoming more and more difficult for them to live there without assistance.

We're considering all the usual options. And one option we'd like to include in those considerations is sharing a house with them. One that would provide significant separation...their space and our space. But yet it wouldn't need to be two totally separate residences. It wouldn't need two full kitchens for example.

Do houses like that...or houses that could be fairly easily modified to be like that...even exist in TV?

And please don't use this thread to warn about the dangers of sharing a house with relatives. We're very aware of the seriousness of such an endeavor. We all get along very well. But of course we would still consider such issues and be duly cautious.

At this point, I'm simply exploring whether or not this alternative is even possible in TV.

Thanks for your input.

How about two CYVs next to one another? That way you both have your "own" place, but they are close enough to check on?

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[mac]

There is a house for sale on Landrum Lane in Sunset Pointe that fits your needs. It is listed by Century 21.

[Goldwingnut]

A Zinna is the floor plan you are looking for, it has 2 master bedrooms and the ability to close off the 2nd/3rd bedroom from the rest of the house. Turning the 3rd bedroom into a small living room for your parents would give them their (any your) privacy and space while keeping them close. See the floor plan below (VNH#12F067). Just a thought.

[Madelaine Amee]

Polar Bear - I want to commend you and your wife for taking this approach to helping elderly parents live out their lives in a safe and comfortable environment.

In the past I have seen homes with inlaw suites for sale, mostly in the older neighborhoods and especially The Hammock area of Spanish Springs where the homes are very big. I would think a good realtor would be of assistance in this case. If you could find a home where your inlaws could walk to a square on their own, that would be perfect. I know from experience that you will need to get a break from one another from time to time. This link is to a home with inlaw suite which was sold recently in Tierra Del Sol so they are available. 306 Carrera Dr, The Villages, FL 32159 - realtor.com(R)

I hope you find what you need for both parties!