The two times we resided in Florida........1972 for one full year and then in 1994 for FOUR MONTHS........before returning north.....we were never choosing to be "unhappy".

We had a 2 year old and a 5 year old the first time around.
We just missed the "four seasons" and the beauty of those 4 seasons.
Now, truthfully, we couldn't care in the least if winter never arrived.
In 1973 we returned and bought our third home, on the same street as our second home, same neighborhood, same neighbors and settled in for the next 25 years until our kids graduated university and married, went off on their own, etc.

At that time, now 1994, still in our late 40's, we decided we wanted a condo on the beach..........sold the big sprawling home with inground pool, etc.......and headed for Florida once again.

By the way, we vacationed in Florida every single year of our marriage and knew both coasts........but only interior Disney World as far as central Florida was concerned.

Well, again, we "did not choose to be unhappy". My mom's third husband had passed away and we had to close down two homes to bring her along with us.........discovering that she was in the early stages of Alzheimers Disease.........very confused. Long story short, we decided to sell the condo on the beach (totally remodeled beautifully by us) and return to ours and her "support system" in Vermont...........it was the right decision for the past twenty years............

A minor part of that decision (besides the Alzheimers) was the rigid rules of condo living............the "organization" or whatever it is called, were extremely elderly and extremely rigid ; not allowing washers and dryers in the units, etc...........among other things. There was NO pest control.
Nuff said. The condo and the location was gorgeous.....but we were SO VERY HAPPY to return to our little town where everyone knew everyone and no one had show I.D. or sign a contract for work done in your own home........too much red tape in Florida.........

We had just flown back and were driving up to our new house (same old neighborhood which draws us back like a magnet).........when the Town Clerk, our neighbor of long standing, stopped and said, "DO YOU WANT ME TO PUT YOU THREE BACK ON OUR VOTING REGISTRY?" We said, "Sure". No I.D. to show, no papers to sign..........just our word and a handshake is all that's needed up here. It is a different world.

Although everything ended up well and we did make a profit on the beachfront condo.......we found out that the "carpenters" for the kitchen remodel had some type of lein on their business...........not sure if I spelled lein right or if that is the right word.........but it affected our sale...........they were recommended by the kitchen cabinet store.
Luckily, our bathroom guys, etc. all were A o.k..........as were the tile guys, the painters and the carpeting guys...........

We also had been "misled" by the realtor who wore a surgical mask.
How dumb can I be? He never disclosed that the area was known for the red tide bacteria..........we soon found ourselves coughing all the time, including my elderly mom............hubby had serious pneumonia like symptoms......as did I later, after the fact, just from walking on the beach or sitting on one of our two balconies.
It felt like we were strangling. We are not hypochondriacs. Never need to visit a doctor. Once we left the area, it cleared up. I did my research.
Red tide has been there forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's in the air....causes bronchial problems, etc.

Just my two cents. We are happy folks by nature.
No one chooses to be unhappy.

Sometimes life just happens........

We are in the stage now where the heat feels better than the cold.
The Villages has everything we would want in a new place......
We might rent for awhile and keep our northern home rather than go through our past experiences again..........it does seem like a lot of folks rent through the winter seasons...........it's cheaper in the long run than buying and selling and buying and selling..............

I actually know of no one who chooses to be unhappy. Life circumstances can interfere with the best of plans, however......

As far as other posters who do not like grandchildren visiting????
I haven't understood that............unless they are very impolite, unruly kids.

Family is everything..........we are proud of ours, having been married almost 50 years.........

This is a terrific....if sobering....reminder that the continuum of life has an inevitable endpoint. It's said that a major differentiation of humans from other species is the ability to contemplate their own mortality; while we can never be absolutely sure that we're truly unique in this cerebral ability, it certainly is part of the human condition and becomes more meaningful as we age.

Coping with the loss of a loved one is very difficult, as can be the challenge of aging for the living. We often hear trite phrases such as "enjoy every minute" or "every day could be your last" or my personal favorite "don't sweat the small stuff...you're going to be dead a long time" but I've never figured out how to incorporate this in a realistic way into the real world of challenges, disappointments and conflicts. But I have learned to look back on each day and be grateful for the "good stuff" and reflect on the lessons learned from the bad. Each day presents a new chance for fun, love, learning and joy.

Vic

Schaumburger, I too believe that "happiness is a choice". However my understanding of this is that we choose to make the best of a situation and focus on the pro's. However if the location is making it difficult to be happy in, then it may become necessary to change the location. I love TV and think it offers more than anyone could ask for in one location. That being said, I am sure that there are many people who do not get pleasure from participating in any of the activities and would be happier on their own in a smaller community or closer to their family on a daily basis, or many other reasons that I can't even fathom. So choosing to be happy becomes that much more difficult. Perhaps if she could be happy for her husband that might work for a while, but in the long run, happiness has to come from within and although there are some women who enjoy pleasing their husbands as a source of their pleasure, if she is home alone for the most part, it is easy to understand why she is unhappy. In truth, there are probably many more factors involved in why someone is unhappy, but I just wanted to note that we can always "choose" happiness, but TV isn't the easiest place for everyone to be able to choose it, if that makes any sense.

BTW there is a good book called "Happiness in a Choice" by Barry Kaufman that speaks to this topic. It was written 20+ years ago but is still relevant today. We took a couples workshop with him back then and it was very impactful. Really helped to identify the beliefs that are keeping us stuck in emotional places that no longer serve us. Still use some of the ideas that we learned.

Glad that you are making the choice to live with that understanding. To me it makes the most sense and it sure makes life fun and joyful. Have you seen the Laughing Yoga group? I want to attend when we get back down. I missed the meeting as we were leaving when I saw it in the REC News.

I'm currently reading a book by Neale Donald Walsh called "Happier than God" (2008) and it is a really good read. He wrote the series "Conversations with God" which were very cutting edge for the general public back then. Did a few workshops with him and found him to be really down to earth, light hearted, and practical so I enjoy his writing as it doesn't feel like a burden to plough through, yet very thought provoking. It is all about choice, and choice making. So I've come full circle in this longwinded post!

LW888

Thanks Vic. Very intelligent post.

Truthfully, I never thought of aging until "the long goodbye" with my mom. It was quite the learning experience.......not only being with her but all of her peers during that last 18 months in the Alzheimers wing at the skilled nursing facility......

At home was a bit different, even though I had to bathe and feed her, dress her, etc............at least I was doing something for her. She still knew me and my husband and our adult children.......

Once in the wheelchair, in diapers, in the nursing home........unable to speak, only remembering her parents and siblings from 1911, 1918, etc. all we could do was spoon feed her some ice cream ........it was the only means of "communicating"..........a crash course in the kind of aging no one wants to experience for their loved one.

It was a wonderful place, two minutes from our home.........the nurses, bathing attendants, personal aides, were all angels of mercy....in my humble opinion. We could visit at any time of day or night.

Her passing was very peaceful; she had signed a "comfort care" only document.........so palliative care it was. Basically, it's dehydration.
No fluids.......just a type of popsicle swab in the mouth........some oxygen and frequent injections of morphine...........the nurses sat with me.....all day into the evening.......she died on my dad's b.day.....and her own mom's death day............not to be all maudlin, but I did feel her spirit "freed"..........and dreamt of her afterward......"happy", "young again" and "free".........it's sad losing them but it was time to go.

So, yes, enjoy each day you have............but not too wild now !!!

:shrug::shrug: what? two differnt points of view from where I'm sitting...Bingo:shrug:

It's the , for want of a better word, "politically correct folks" who do not allow for freedom of speech or opinion on the state of Florida in general.

Anyone who has lived in "small town America" or New England knows that everyone has opinions and sometimes gripes about the town they live in.

It's all taken with a grain of salt.

We read our own local newspaper every morning and laugh at the antics of the local yokals. We don't DENY it ever happened......just as we do not deny the bad weather or flooding, etc.......or in Florida's case, that sinkholes are so prevalent.

For someone to deny that N.E. has pot holes on the roads after winter is just "having their head in the sand".......or to deny that northeners cannot tolerate high heat and humidity, ditto. Even Floridians come up here as tourists to our town and COMPLAIN about the heat and humidity.

I will agree that there is a small faction that cannot tolerate freedom of speech....or asking questions that potential "buyers" seem to repeatedly "need to know". No place is perfect. We've seen most of the beauty of the United States and Canada.......however, again.....no place is perfect.

Hey Russ, I had a snake hiding in my "stuff" in the garage. A scary moment. He finally slithered out when prodded.

...

I don't know how long I can stay gone. Did you notice Bill is missing too?[/QUOTE]

Bill is taking a vacation from TOTV. :popcorn: :popcorn:

One downside......
 

No indoor pools in TV.

Exactly whose post are you replying to? I must have missed something.
Your helpful replies are always pretty much on target, thoughtful, kindhearted and helpful. Why stay gone?

I just re read most of the earlier posts and I must have missed something.

Which villages are the ones north of 466 that have all this freedom?
After retirement, I doubt that too many would want to be "active" again in community affairs such as town politics. Not even sure of what the TV town politics consist of.

In my own post, right before yours, I mentioned being able to speak one's mind freely.........but then I got lost in your posting.

:popcorn:And Skyguy missing?

:popcorn:And Skyguy missing? Cheer up GG it's just dog days.

North of 466
 

It's a long story as to how we came to "govern" ourselves, but we are fortunate to have an amazingly smart group of people north of 466 who "run" our area of TV. They are totally dedicated, work extremely long hours and have access to some very successful retired professionals living here.