Why cant we all play nice?

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  #61  
Old 12-14-2019, 07:30 AM
queasy27 queasy27 is offline
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I think the mods do a good job of squashing any keeping name-calling or outright meanness towards others, but I will agree that the constant cross-examinations can drive people away. Even the most innocuous question or comment is met with a barrage of: did you ask, did you talk, did you call, why are you posting that here, is your vision good, were you speeding, why aren't you answering, do you even live here, how long, what village, why, when, how, etc.

And if a comment is anything even the least bit negative about The Villages: "There must be more to the story."

Some posters can be quite opinionated about How Everything Should Be Done.
  #62  
Old 12-14-2019, 07:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by queasy27 View Post
I think the mods do a good job of squashing any keeping name-calling or outright meanness towards others, but I will agree that the constant cross-examinations can drive people away. Even the most innocuous question or comment is met with a barrage of: did you ask, did you talk, did you call, why are you posting that here, is your vision good, were you speeding, why aren't you answering, do you even live here, how long, what village, why, when, how, etc.

And if a comment is anything even the least bit negative about The Villages: "There must be more to the story."

Some posters can be quite opinionated about How Everything Should Be Done.
I think you described me. I will try to do better, but some folks do put up a "rant" about something that sounds very unusual and then...people read it and think...What is he/she talking about?

And some people...(like me) will post something seemingly innocent because we can't come straight out and say some stuff because of site rules.

Please don't tell Santa. It is very hard for me to be good.
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  #63  
Old 12-14-2019, 10:39 AM
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lovely post. yes, its best not to focus on the cruel posts, i feel its the same few who may be miserable or nasty. i keep my discussions to the point in terms of being relevant, & meet LOTS of very nice, genuine people who can not only speak well, but makes the nasty comments so insignificant i give them no notice. i love it here in the villages & am proud to say so.
  #64  
Old 12-14-2019, 11:11 AM
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Originally Posted by lovinganimals View Post
I often am amazed at how rude responses can be on this forum. Uncalled for and just plain mean. Cant people respond in a nice manner, even if they disagree? Why all the animosity? I'm not talking politics or anything like that, but sometimes the post is totally innocent a d people respond like the OP has no brain. It's just plain mean and rude.
My very personal feeling is that it is built into us to fight before we flee. If humans were able to politely disagree in a rational manner there would be no need for war. My Father used to say put all the warmongers from both sides in a room and let them fight it out, instead of sending other peoples' children to fight their battles for them. Maybe we need a chat line where posters can throw insults at each other and get it out of their system.

Rudeness, throwing a finger, yelling obscenities and actually raising a fist to someone who does something that WE think is against us personally is, unfortunately, becoming the way most of the human race reacts, and it would appear that many people think there is nothing wrong with that reaction..
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  #65  
Old 12-14-2019, 12:14 PM
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I had gone to see The Peanut Butter Falcon back on a Tuesday after it had just opened at the Rialto and while purchasing a medium drink medium popcorn and hot dog had noticed the woman behind me pointing her index finger to her temple like her pointing a gun. I looked away and she made a noose like figure with her hands and acted like she was being hung. I was livid but said NOTHING and went to see the movie. Which I lost myself in and it sounded like she had been kicked out of the theater for this garbage and I had heard some of the women she was with talking about it happening. They sat a few rows in front of me.

They did look like Villagers. Of the younger set. The movie theater people might have seen these antics. Someone did complain about them but I did not as I am not very confrontational in person and I was extremely upset by this behavior.

So there are rather rotten people in the Villages but I find them to be few and far between. And it seemed to be motivated by the time and place as well as my own opinions. This was on October 1, 2019 in Spanish Springs.
My older brother and his wife were in town from October 5-9 so I talked them into seeing The Peanut Butter Falcon at the Rialto Theater on Tuesday October 8, 2019 and created some good memories to associate with this great movie.

I try to fix bad experiences with good ones even if that does not always work. And the good people I have met in the Villages far outnumber the lousy ones. And the Rialto management did the right thing with kicking this tall blonde 50ish woman out of the theater that day. Not sure what else happened after that as it is pretty much out of my hands.

The rotten people do not control my life. I did not tell my brother and sister-in-law about this garbage nor definitely did not tell my parents, neighbors, etc. about this woman's cruel actions.
  #66  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:18 PM
JimJohnson JimJohnson is offline
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I believe most of us want to play nice. Some like to troll and some just don’t like themselves. I have been so fortunate to be with the same woman that I adore for over 50 years and we both love The Villages lifestyle, so it is easy for me to be nice, so I offer to share love and best wishes to those that would rather create Chaos. I say try it the nice way and you will be surprised how good it makes you feel inside.
  #67  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:23 PM
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Taltarzac725 Taltarzac725 is offline
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I believe most of us want to play nice. Some like to troll and some just don’t like themselves. I have been so fortunate to be with the same woman that I adore for over 50 years and we both love The Villages lifestyle, so it is easy for me to be nice, so I offer to share love and best wishes to those that would rather create Chaos. I say try it the nice way and you will be surprised how good it makes you feel inside.
Very nice post. Many of the Villagers I have met here since June 2005 are very much like you. My Mom and Dad have been married since around 1954. Or maybe even before that. He was in a M.A.S.H. Unit in Korea but the war was over before he landed there.
  #68  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:24 PM
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Originally Posted by Taltarzac725 View Post
My older brother and his wife were in town from October 5-9 so I talked them into seeing The Peanut Butter Falcon at the Rialto Theater on Tuesday October 8, 2019 and created some good memories to associate with this great movie.

I try to fix bad experiences with good ones even if that does not always work. And the good people I have met in the Villages far outnumber the lousy ones. And the Rialto management did the right thing with kicking this tall blonde 50ish woman out of the theater that day. Not sure what else happened after that as it is pretty much out of my hands.

The rotten people do not control my life. I did not tell my brother and sister-in-law about this garbage nor definitely did not tell my parents, neighbors, etc. about this woman's cruel actions.
Don't let it eat you, she probably thinks she is funny, someone needs to tell her otherwise.
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  #69  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Madelaine Amee View Post
Don't let it eat you, she probably thinks she is funny, someone needs to tell her otherwise.
She probably was quite surprised when they kicked her out of the Rialto. I was buying a medium coke, medium buttered popcorn and hot dog at the time and felt that someone was behind me doing something strange from how the counter person was re-acting. That is when I saw her pointing an imaginary pistol at her temple. I looked back to the person helping me and then at this woman who was then making a noose and twisting her neck. The counter person definitely saw this junk as I hope did some of the other theater workers and customers.

It looked like the some of the women with her came into The Peanut Butter Falcon as they were talking about how "she" managed to get herself kicked out of the theater so that she would not be joining them.

I am very vocal on Facebook and was kind of a main target on the TOTV Political Forum when it was open. Those played a role as well as what happened across the street from the Rialto in early October of 2019.

Last edited by Taltarzac725; 12-14-2019 at 01:48 PM.
  #70  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:40 PM
Luv2Bretired Luv2Bretired is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by queasy27 View Post
I think the mods do a good job of squashing any keeping name-calling or outright meanness towards others, but I will agree that the constant cross-examinations can drive people away. Even the most innocuous question or comment is met with a barrage of: did you ask, did you talk, did you call, why are you posting that here, is your vision good, were you speeding, why aren't you answering, do you even live here, how long, what village, why, when, how, etc.

And if a comment is anything even the least bit negative about The Villages: "There must be more to the story."

Some posters can be quite opinionated about How Everything Should Be Done.
Some posts by a handful of people I do find range from doltish to downright vicious. As a hopeful future Villager if I thought these posters represented typical Villagers I would retire somewhere else. However, having spent some time in The Villages I know these curmudgeons are likely not a numerous component of the populace.
  #71  
Old 12-14-2019, 01:46 PM
JimJohnson JimJohnson is offline
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Originally Posted by Luv2Bretired View Post
Some posts by a handful of people I do find range from doltish to downright vicious. As a hopeful future Villager if I thought these posters represented typical Villagers I would retire somewhere else. However, having spent some time in The Villages I know these curmudgeons are likely not a numerous component of the populace.
I felt that when I started posting on this site, but found quickly that if you are harassed, the monitors will step in an correct the situation. Don’t get trolled in and I witness that after 10 years here, only a very small group will give you a hard time. Ignore them and you will enjoy this site and I promise, you will love The Villages.
  #72  
Old 12-14-2019, 08:34 PM
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Why can't we all play nice? Loving Animals, what a perfect question really! I know your heart is in the right place so to speak.

Your question was a refresher for me. I have drastically improved and play better with others but admit that there is always room for improvement. I have a blast mixing it up with a few people. Why not, it keeps things interesting. It is much more fun to be on the defense and taking care of your own character than it is attacking other people's character especially when I have no right to do so. I prefer to be a Peace Maker instead of trying to be the troublemaker. We should all remember that a person who we attack may be taking care of a sick person, may have just experienced a major loss of some kind and is someone's Mom, Dad, Husband, Wife, Sister, Brother etc or may have just gotten a bad medical report about themselves or a loved one.

We can't all play nice, Not a chance. Countries, religions, Political Parties, Family, Marriages, Races, Children Bla Bla Bla can't get along. Why would it happen here?

I'm gonna try harder and love the way you asked your question and it is nice to meet someone so thoughtful on our Forum. Great Job you AnimalLover you! Greg Gutfeld ANIMALS are Great BIRTHDAY - YouTube
  #73  
Old 12-15-2019, 07:43 AM
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2% of any group try to ruin it for the rest. Just stay positive and ignore the noise.
  #74  
Old 12-15-2019, 10:06 AM
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Originally Posted by graciegirl View Post
Recently I have seen posters who have been banned return under a new name. It takes a while for the moderators to figure this out, and sometimes it goes on for awhile. I don't think this Forum should have people who only think one way, but there are people who fall out of the perimeters of behavior of what most people find decent and they have agenda's not easily understood. Maybe all of their life they have been like that or some life shattering things have made them bitter and angry.

I have grown to have a thicker skin online, but there are still bullies and brawlers and I hate it when I sink to their level and sometimes I do.
Gracie, you are always so nice! If you got mad, there was a definite reason! Thanks for all of your positive responses all the time.
  #75  
Old 12-15-2019, 10:08 AM
xcaligirl xcaligirl is offline
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My feeling is because there are some pretty nasty people here. Some are older and not very healthy which makes them even more cranky however NO excuse! They feel it's easy to sit behind a computer and say whatever they want to say. There are nice people here.
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