"The wife"

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Old 05-16-2011, 09:53 PM
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IMHO - In a non-personal situation, a better term would be to use "my spouse", indicating that you are equal partners in life and share what you have together but then, what do I know, I'm single.
I dunno. "My spouse" kind of sounds impersonal to me too. Maybe because I associate it with forms (i.e., "your name," spouse's name," etc.)

If I'm speaking with someone who doesn't know him, I say "my husband". As Sky said, if he's not my husband, whose husband is he.
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Old 05-16-2011, 10:07 PM
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I dunno. "My spouse" kind of sounds impersonal to me too. Maybe because I associate it with forms (i.e., "your name," spouse's name," etc.)

If I'm speaking with someone who doesn't know him, I say "my husband". As Sky said, if he's not my husband, whose husband is he.
OMG, my wifes gonna have a fit-canipshin when she finds out I have a husband!!!
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Old 05-16-2011, 10:11 PM
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I dunno. "My spouse" kind of sounds impersonal to me too. Maybe because I associate it with forms (i.e., "your name," spouse's name," etc.)

If I'm speaking with someone who doesn't know him, I say "my husband". As Sky said, if he's not my husband, whose husband is he.
He is one lucky guy, your husband!!!
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Old 05-17-2011, 02:18 AM
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I could always call her "my first wife"......
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Old 05-17-2011, 08:44 AM
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My lady is younger than I am, but she often tells me that on my best days I am 5 or 6. If she didn't support me in the things that I do the same as I support her in her hobbies we would not have the best marriage in the world. She is a wonderful lady and I am lucky to have her. So I refer to her has my best friend and the love of my life.
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Old 05-17-2011, 08:56 AM
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I could always call her "my first wife"......
Sometimes I introduce Sweetie as "my first husband". It keeps him on his toes.
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Old 05-17-2011, 09:08 AM
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As far as I can remember the is refers to inanimate ojects and my is a pronoun that refers to something that belongs to you. It sounds way more animate. JMHO
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Old 05-17-2011, 10:41 AM
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In our house we have a blue list, which is posted on the fridge, and lists all the chores that Fireboy needs to do. Like fixing taps, checking the sprinklers, etc. When Fireboy accomplishes some of those tasks, he is My Bunny. When he ignores the blue list, he becomes My Spousal Unit.

There is no pink list because it would be ongoing, never ending, and require way too much ink!
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Old 05-17-2011, 01:30 PM
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IMHO, the only person that has a say in what she or he is called is the person being referred to. If it is OK with them, what business is it to anyone else? I have seen way too many slick talking shysters publicly be politically correct only to turn out to be real JAs. Better to judge people on how they treat their spouses and others rather than the words they may use to describe them. If my wife (or any one for that matter) does not like to be referred to in some manner, I would simply not do it. No need for others to be judgemental.
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Old 05-17-2011, 03:35 PM
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I believe you are all making too much of this. "my" "the" what's really the difference. Anyone that sensitive to either word may be asking for trouble becaue I view it as being picky and being icky can sink a marriage or diminish it unnecessarily And, given , the filthy names coming out of the mouths of young marrieds today I am surprised this is even worthy of discussion My (the) wife and I have been together since age 13.
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Old 05-17-2011, 04:47 PM
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I believe you are all making too much of this. "my" "the" what's really the difference. Anyone that sensitive to either word may be asking for trouble becaue I view it as being picky and being icky can sink a marriage or diminish it unnecessarily And, given , the filthy names coming out of the mouths of young marrieds today I am surprised this is even worthy of discussion My (the) wife and I have been together since age 13.
WOW. Since you were 13?

Sweetie and I have been a couple since we were 18. I like him even more now than then. He is the nicest man I have ever met.

There are a lot of lovely pairings in TV and some who are not so happy too.
That's the way the world is.
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Old 05-17-2011, 05:06 PM
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OMG, my wifes gonna have a fit-canipshin when she finds out I have a husband!!!
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Old 05-17-2011, 05:19 PM
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Yep 13. It has been a long but lovely ride. I graduated from a catholic Grammar School moved to a public entering freshman year and my friend had attended this public school. On my first day there he was showing me around when I spotted her. She had a cute ponytail, gray jumper white blouse and black flats. I ask my friend her name. He told me and I told him that was the girl I was going to marry. She said she didn't like me because I was that conceited boy from catholic school who had a bad reputation. I chased her until May (now 14) when she caught me. When I entered the Navy she sent me a letter everyday for the first two years when we got married I was then 19 and she 18. finish the remaining two years and we sent up our first nest and began our married lives We planned our lives from the day we started going "steady"... remember that term? We are approaching our 50th next year. We believe that the secret to staying together is compromise and so for 49 years we have compromised and done it "the" wife's way.
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Old 05-17-2011, 06:57 PM
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Originally Posted by rubicon View Post
Yep 13. It has been a long but lovely ride. I graduated from a catholic Grammar School moved to a public entering freshman year and my friend had attended this public school. On my first day there he was showing me around when I spotted her. She had a cute ponytail, gray jumper white blouse and black flats. I ask my friend her name. He told me and I told him that was the girl I was going to marry. She said she didn't like me because I was that conceited boy from catholic school who had a bad reputation. I chased her until May (now 14) when she caught me. When I entered the Navy she sent me a letter everyday for the first two years when we got married I was then 19 and she 18. finish the remaining two years and we sent up our first nest and began our married lives We planned our lives from the day we started going "steady"... remember that term? We are approaching our 50th next year. We believe that the secret to staying together is compromise and so for 49 years we have compromised and done it "the" wife's way.
Rubicon and Gracie:

What wonderful, heart-warming stories...I thank you both for sharing.

If I may...I saw future wifey on May 4, 1972 at exactly 630pm. She was warming up to play in a rec dept softball league; that week I had just started working for the rec dept. My job that night was to umpire that night's games.

As luck/fate would have it, there was a close play at first base. I called her out; she disagreed. Despite that first encounter, we eventually started dating, yes...went steady, became engaged, and closed on our house the day before we married (old school here: we began living together on our wedding night).

To this day, however, Wifey still says that she was safe at first base, and that I was wrong!!!

Over the years, however I always prevail in that argument or any disagreement involving judgment: I simply remind her that I married her, but that she married me. Everyone who knows us will say that I got the better deal (by far!!), thus reinforcing my assertion that her judgment is suspect at best.

If God permits, Wifey and I will walk as long a path as each of you and your respective spouses have.

PS: I apologize to all fellow posters or hijacking this thread.
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Old 05-17-2011, 08:57 PM
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Originally Posted by gmcneill View Post
Rubicon and Gracie:

What wonderful, heart-warming stories...I thank you both for sharing.

If I may...I saw future wifey on May 4, 1972 at exactly 630pm. She was warming up to play in a rec dept softball league; that week I had just started working for the rec dept. My job that night was to umpire that night's games.

As luck/fate would have it, there was a close play at first base. I called her out; she disagreed. Despite that first encounter, we eventually started dating, yes...went steady, became engaged, and closed on our house the day before we married (old school here: we began living together on our wedding night).

To this day, however, Wifey still says that she was safe at first base, and that I was wrong!!!

Over the years, however I always prevail in that argument or any disagreement involving judgment: I simply remind her that I married her, but that she married me. Everyone who knows us will say that I got the better deal (by far!!), thus reinforcing my assertion that her judgment is suspect at best.

If God permits, Wifey and I will walk as long a path as each of you and your respective spouses have.

PS: I apologize to all fellow posters or hijacking this thread.
It's elementary, my dear. She's right. ...

If you waited 'til your wedding night, then she was indeed safe at first base.
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