More intersesting than Wackadoodle's library thread

 
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  #406  
Old 09-16-2017, 10:02 AM
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The following test was developed by a combination of top US and European
psychologists. The results are extremely accurate in describing your
personality with one simple question.

Which is your favorite Teletubbie:

A. Yellow - La La
B. Purple - Tinky Winky
C. Green - Dipsy
D. Red - Po

Scroll down to get your profile...


























A. You chose the Yellow Teletubbie: You are gay.
B. You chose the Purple Teletubbie: You are gay.
C. You chose the Green Teletubbie: You are gay.
D. You chose the Red Teletubbie: You are gay.
  #407  
Old 09-16-2017, 10:04 AM
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A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank,
he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink
his cola, and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside.
One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on.
The other man came along behind and filled in the hole. While one was
digging a new hole, the other was 25 feet behind filling in the old.
The men worked right past the fellow with the soft drink and went on
down the road.
"I can't stand this," said the man, tossing the can into a trash
container and headed down the road toward the men. "Hold it, hold it,"
he said to the men. "Can you tell me what's going on here with this
digging?" "Well, we work for the government," one of the men said.
"But one of you is digging a hole and the other fills it up. You're
not accomplishing anything. Aren't you wasting the taxpayers' money?"
"You don't understand, mister," one of the men said, leaning on
his shovel and wiping his brow. Normally there's three of us - me,
Rodney, and Mike. I dig the hole, Rodney sticks in the tree, and Mike
here puts the dirt back.
Now just because Rodney's sick, that doesn't mean that Mike and me
can't work.
  #408  
Old 09-16-2017, 10:10 AM
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POLITICALLY CORRECT "SHE" TERMS

She does not:
GET PMS
She becomes:
HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

She does not have:
A KILLER BODY
She is:
TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

She is not:
A BAD COOK
She is:
MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

She is not:
A BAD DRIVER
She is:
AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

She is not a:
PERFECT 10
She is:
NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

She is not:
EASY
She is:
HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

She does not:
HATE SPORTS ON TV
She is:
ATHLETICALLY BIASED

She does not have:
SEXY LIPS
She is:
COLLAGEN DEPENDENT

She does not get:
DRUNK
She is:
ACCIDENTALLY OVER-SERVED

You do not ask her:
TO DANCE
You request a:
PRE-COITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

She is not:
A GOSSIP
She is a:
VERBAL TERMINATOR

She does not:
WORK OUT TOO MUCH
She is an:
ABDOMINAL OVERACHIEVER

She does not have:
A GREAT BUTT
She is:
GLUTEUS TO THE MAXIMUS

She is not:
HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS
She is:
MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED

She is not:
COLD OR FRIGID
She is:
THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

She does not:
WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP
She is:
COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

She does not have:
GREAT CLEAVAGE (A GREAT RACK)
Her breasts are:
CENTRALLY LOCATED

She will never:
GAIN WEIGHT
She will become:
A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

She is not:
A SCREAMER OR MOANER
She is:
VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

She does not:
SHAVE HER LEGS
She experiences:
TEMPORARY STUBBLE REDUCTION

She does not have:
A HARD BODY
She is:
ANATOMICALLY INFLEXIBLE

She does not:
SUN BATHE
She experiences:
SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

Her breast will never:
SAG
They will:
LOSE THEIR VERTICAL HOLD

She does not:
SHOP TOO MUCH
She is:
OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

She does not:
CUT YOU OFF
She becomes:
HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

She does not have:
BIG HAIR
She is:
OVERLY AEROSOLED

She does not:
SNORE
She is:
NASALLY REPETITIVE

She does not:
GET DRUNK
She becomes:
VERBALLY DYSLEXIC

She does not have:
BIG HOOTERS
Her:
CUPS RUNNETH OVER

She is not:
TOO SKINNY
She is:
SKELETALLY PROMINENT
  #409  
Old 09-22-2017, 08:39 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MDLNB View Post
POLITICALLY CORRECT "SHE" TERMS

She does not:
GET PMS
She becomes:
HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

She does not have:
A KILLER BODY
She is:
TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

She is not:
A BAD COOK
She is:
MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

She is not:
A BAD DRIVER
She is:
AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

She is not a:
PERFECT 10
She is:
NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

She is not:
EASY
She is:
HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

She does not:
HATE SPORTS ON TV
She is:
ATHLETICALLY BIASED

She does not have:
SEXY LIPS
She is:
COLLAGEN DEPENDENT

She does not get:
DRUNK
She is:
ACCIDENTALLY OVER-SERVED

You do not ask her:
TO DANCE
You request a:
PRE-COITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

She is not:
A GOSSIP
She is a:
VERBAL TERMINATOR

She does not:
WORK OUT TOO MUCH
She is an:
ABDOMINAL OVERACHIEVER

She does not have:
A GREAT BUTT
She is:
GLUTEUS TO THE MAXIMUS

She is not:
HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS
She is:
MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED

She is not:
COLD OR FRIGID
She is:
THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

She does not:
WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP
She is:
COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

She does not have:
GREAT CLEAVAGE (A GREAT RACK)
Her breasts are:
CENTRALLY LOCATED

She will never:
GAIN WEIGHT
She will become:
A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

She is not:
A SCREAMER OR MOANER
She is:
VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

She does not:
SHAVE HER LEGS
She experiences:
TEMPORARY STUBBLE REDUCTION

She does not have:
A HARD BODY
She is:
ANATOMICALLY INFLEXIBLE

She does not:
SUN BATHE
She experiences:
SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

Her breast will never:
SAG
They will:
LOSE THEIR VERTICAL HOLD

She does not:
SHOP TOO MUCH
She is:
OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

She does not:
CUT YOU OFF
She becomes:
HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

She does not have:
BIG HAIR
She is:
OVERLY AEROSOLED

She does not:
SNORE
She is:
NASALLY REPETITIVE

She does not:
GET DRUNK
She becomes:
VERBALLY DYSLEXIC

She does not have:
BIG HOOTERS
Her:
CUPS RUNNETH OVER

She is not:
TOO SKINNY
She is:
SKELETALLY PROMINENT
What, no new jokes in almost a week?
  #410  
Old 09-23-2017, 03:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
What, no new jokes in almost a week?
Hey, give me a break. You are starting to sound like a Liberal, wondering why his welfare check is late.
  #411  
Old 09-23-2017, 06:14 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
Note the title of this thread. Not amusing in the least. Started on 04-29-2017, 08:46 AM. Almost five months of taunting of me. And who is complaining about trolling and baiting of other posters? MDLNB on another thread. What a hypocrite.
Still baiting and harassment from the gang of TRUMP trolls. I am no longer looking at any posts by this crowd of cyber bullies.
  #412  
Old 10-12-2017, 09:48 AM
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Three guys die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven...don't step on the ducks!"

So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest woman he has ever seen. St. Peter chains them together and says "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to the ugly woman!"

The next day, the second guy steps accidentally on a duck, and long comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing, and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first guy.

The third guy has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid eyes on...a very tall, tan, curvaceous, sexy blonde. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.

The guy remarks, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?" She says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!”
  #413  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by guest
still baiting and harassment from the gang of trump trolls. I am no longer looking at any posts by this crowd of cyber bullies.
trump trolls!!!!
  #414  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:10 AM
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Good one MDLNB!

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using Tapatalk
  #415  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:11 AM
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Thanks for the view wackadoodle!

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G890A using Tapatalk
  #416  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
What, no new jokes in almost a week?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
Hey, give me a break. You are starting to sound like a Liberal, wondering why his welfare check is late.
Now that is funny!
  #417  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:15 AM
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Cyber Harassment-Internet Defamation & Internet Trolls

Why does this jerk not post jokes where they belong? On the Regular Forum under the Just for Fun Thread where they can be moderated!!!
  #418  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:15 AM
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Cyber Harassment-Internet Defamation & Internet Trolls

Why does this jerk not post jokes where they belong? On the Regular Forum under the Just for Fun Thread where they can be moderated!!!
  #419  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:15 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
Still baiting and harassment from the gang of TRUMP trolls. I am no longer looking at any posts by this crowd of cyber bullies.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
trump trolls!!!!
Then why do you keep looking at and posting on this thread???
  #420  
Old 10-12-2017, 10:16 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Guest
Then why do you keep looking at and posting on this thread???
Because once in a while someone not on my IGNORE LIST posts on it.

You get that it is the TITLE of this thread that offends me!!!
 

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