It's a tough situation, and one that sometimes you just have to accept. A friend's family lost all their inheritance to a second wife, when the trust/wills weren't updated to reflect the second marriage. Parent's mistake. .
I am the executor of both my parents' estate, and I have siblings who think only they are qualified, though they don't have the education nor the experience nor the willingness to do the job required.
Sometimes you just have to accept that your parents were first timers here on earth, and they didn't have the experience nor the foresight to see the situation ahead of time. When we tried to tell my dad he was wrong about the health care proxy, He responded with "Its are all taken care of, its are locked in the safe" He tried to apologize in his own way when at the hospital, and they asked for the document, he said they were home in the safe. . .
So both your parent's are human and are far from perfect, and as they get older, they have less clarity and understanding of their situations, or past actions. . many times less likely to accept they were wrong. .
I have no words of encouragement to rectify the situation, but realize that sometimes, family is over rated. . .
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