And you have an outhouse? - good lord people.

And let’s not forget the counter, when u own a cat, they surf the counters. Anyone who says their cat doesn’t do that is delusional, unless of course they made the cat so fat it can’t jump that high.
While ur sleeping ur litter box is on the tables and counters.
That’s the reason I hate potlucks.

We had a tiny cat that couldn't jump up to the counters. :)

Pretty sure he/she knows how to flush... As opposed to scooping crap out of sand IN one's home...

Dog Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 PM - Watched TV with my people! My favorite thing!

11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!




Cat Diary

Day 983 of my captivity

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.

Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.... for now.

Yipsters!

We had a cat for 14 years and he never got on the table or counters.
He could scale our 6' fence so I know he could have jumped on the counters if he wanted to. I guess he just wasn't curious enough to try. We have cameras set up to watch when we're not at home.
:bigbow::bigbow:

I installed a permanent doggy door for our little dogs and our cat.
We kept the cat litter box on the lanai... NOT in the house.
:ohdear::ohdear::ohdear:

Absolutely perfect! Did you read you cat’s diary?! Gave me a good laugh. Thanks!

We once had a poodle like that. She got where we couldn't leave her at a kennel if we traveled because then she wouldn't eat. This was over 30 yrs ago. She was super-smart!

Isn't that where your bathroom is? Lol

Anyone know why Sammy Jo's in Mulberry Plaza has been shut down for "Maintenance"?

So funny!!! 😂

Hilarious!
 

Thanks for posting this! I needed a good laugh today. Loved it!:clap2:

This reminds me of the parrot/burgler/ dog joke, wish I could find, I'm sure everyone has heard it. Cunny