And I suppose u stay up all night as well

Unless his/her bathroom is a box of sand, your analogy fails...

You are unique

Yeah but I don’t try to cover it up when I’m finished and rarely do I ever have to hock up a fur ball

And here is the classic:

How to pill your cat…………

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, holding front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold cat's head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with its head just visible from below spouse's armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force cat's mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Force cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 pint of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room. Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Stop by furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for vet to make a house call.

I wrap pill in delightful treat, treat gone, pill found later under my pillow....smart dog, dumb owner..

What
 

“Henri, le Chat Noir: The Existential Musings of an Angst-Filled Cat” is now a book by Will Braden. . .

Henri can be found in his YouTube videos, sharing his cynical observations of his world.

Videos of Henri capture him in various situations that cause him much angst or ennui — like going to the vet or witnessing a Halloween party. Then there is the “other” cat he must endure in the same house. Henri thinks of that cat as “The Imbecile” — that word sounds perfect in French. . .

You hear Henri’s thoughts as voiceovers in (subtitled) French which makes the videos even funnier. Henri sounds so aloof and put upon. (I don’t speak French and I think Henri is from Seattle, but French is perfect for angst-ridden Henri’s thoughts.)

Henri is disgusted by his owner — who does not own a tuxedo. Henri is, of course, a tuxedo cat.

If you need a laugh this morning, find Henri the Existential Cat with a search that will take you to his videos on YouTube.

Boomer

PS: I was trying to title this post “What is that cat thinking?” but I bumped submit, too soon, accidentally causing that dangling ‘what’ that cannot be edited.

You forgot to add "How to give your dog a pill"...

1. Take pill

2. Wrap pill in cheese or bacon

3. Make dog beg... :icon_wink:

Forget this on list.


The prowl, they crap in neighborhood flower beds, they don’t bark so they get break, the kill hundreds of song birds, the kill baby rabbits.

Dogs will love you unconditionally, cats could not care less. If cats could text you back, they wouldn’t.

You are confusing feral cats and pet cats. Domestic cats, if let outside (not a good idea) generally kill weak and diseased rodents and birds. The feral cats help curb rat and rabbit populations.

If dogs were left to be feral they will pack together and attack humans. I could tell you stories about what I saw dogs eating in Iraq (it's what you think).

Agree, but not all house cats are not kept in house only. See plenty prowling at nights with little collars on. How many feral dogs do you see around squares? That would be none. How may feral cats see around squares….
I disagree that house cats only kill diseased birds and rodents.

Feral cats eat what they kill. House cats kill but seldom eat their kill. As for killing mostly weak or deseased, that is a canine trait, seen in wolves pack hunting separating the old, young, sick or weak. Wild cats hunt by themselves and kill what ever they can to survive.
House cats do pose a threat to wild life when they are out and about, doing what cats do, hunt and kill. They are not bad, it is their .

2022 0302 Wed @ 13:41
Someone / anyone grousing about a cat / dog reducing the wildlife population should take a walk along Corbin Trail and count the gators.

We have never allowed any of our cats outside. If you see a cat out and about with a collar take a pic, most likely lost.
Our 4 pound declawed Himalayan wouldn’t make it outside. Has zero skills to hunt, track, or play with a toy.

She does beg, sit up, and comes when you whistle. Sits at the door when she hears the garage door open waiting for you. She is so tiny jumping on our bed is out of the question. Just turned 11, still looks like a kitten.