Old Sayings

[ilovetv]

"He'd rather rule in hell than serve in heaven."

[CarolSells]

ARE YOU SURE you aren't Boomer?

I'm not Boomer. She was actually a bit before my time on here so I'll just say that I'll take that as a compliment, Gracie.


Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

[2BNTV]

He/she has more hang-ups than the phone company.

[kfierle]

Oh, for Pete's sake!

[kfierle]

What, were you raised in a barn? (My mother said this to us when we left the front or back door to the house open during the winter).

[kfierle]

People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.

[anarick]

Is it 'Don't cut your nose to spite your face" ???

[anarick]

How about "It's like putting five pounds of s--t in a four pound bag"

[2BNTV]

Up yur nose with a rubber hose.

[marybb]

Don't wish your life away, it will go by fast enough !

[marybb]

Sticks and stones may break my bones , but names will never hurt me.

[graciegirl]

I'm not stupid. That's my brother, he's bent way over.

I'm not as dumb as I look.

Don't let this blonde hair fool ya.

[2BNTV]

I'm not as stupid as you look.

[2BNTV]

Excuse me for breathing.

[Peachie]

Red sky in the morning, sailor take warning. Red sky at night, sailor's delight.

[Peachie]

An old quote from farming country in the midwest that comes to mind after the terribly dry summer weather...

In a dry year, you may go a little hungry. In a wet year, you'll starve.

[Peachie]

My favorite which my father used upon a few occasions...

If you're born to hang, you'll never drown.

[2BNTV]

Peachie kean.

[Posh 08]

"I'm from Missouri, show me."

[graciegirl]

I don't give a damn for the whole state of Michigan, I'm from Oh hi o!;)

[2BNTV]

Ain't that a kick in the head.

[anarick]

All talk and no action.

[2BNTV]

Speak softly and carry a big stick.

[buzzy]

Sin in haste, repent in leisure.

[anarick]

You're not worth a lick.

[2BNTV]

Your yellow.

[anarick]

Mellow yellow

[2BNTV]

Yellow submarine.

[anarick]

That a sandwich?

[JeffAVEWS]

Brain fart!

[anarick]

What do you call a person that can't fart in public?

A private TUTOR.

[2BNTV]

Lets go to the submarine races.

[anarick]

Pull my finger

[sunflower3630]

My Dad's favorite: Enough is enough, and too much is sufficient!

[sunflower3630]

OK, this really got me thinking and remembering. I apologize if these have been written already. I've read all the posts but can't remember them all! :icon_wink:

Out with the old; in with the new.
A penny for your thoughts.
Snug as a bug in a rug.
What's that got to do with the price of tea in China??
Stick that in your pipe and smoke it!
She's got a little hitch in her git-along.
Crazy as a bed bug.
And you can take that to the bank!
Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!
Son of a gun! (Joey Bishop show)
Speak now and forever hold your peace.
Two wrongs don't make a right.
Put a lid on it!
Where's the fire?
Phony as a two dollar bill.
Out on a limb
Who died and made you boss?

And now,
Good night; sleep tight; don't let the bed bugs bite!

[2BNTV]

He doesn't have two nickels to rub together.

[2BNTV]

He doesn't have a pot to p**s in and a window to throw it out.

[2BNTV]

Brother, can you spare a dime.

[anarick]

Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.

[Pturner]

My get up and go got up and went.

[anarick]

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

[2BNTV]

If you believe that, I've got a bridge in Brooklyn I'd like to sell you.

[anarick]

Take every birthday with a grain of salt. This works better if the salt accompanies a Margarita.

[anarick]

Save your breath. You'll need it to blow up your date.

[renielarson]

Up a creek without a paddle.

Butter my butt and call me a biscuit.

When you assume you make an as* out of u and me.

I wasn't born yesterday.

[renielarson]

Here's a real nasty one...

Sh*t fire and a red as*ed mule.

When you need to go to the bathroom...There's one at the gate.

[anarick]

Few women admit their age, few men act theirs.

[anarick]

When there's a will I want to be in it.

[renielarson]

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

The grass is greener on the other side.

[2BNTV]

Where there is a will, there are relatives.

[anarick]

Honk if you want to see my finger.

[2BNTV]

Honk if you want to see my finger.

Bumper sticker read, "Honk if you love Jesus".

He honked and the religious bumper sticker guy flipped him the bird.

True story.

[anarick]

A nice quote is "It doesn't cost anything to be nice"

[2BNTV]

A nice quote is "It doesn't cost anything to be nice"

Thank you. :smiley:

Back to the salt mine.

[anarick]

what's cookin good lookin

[2BNTV]

I'll see around like a donut and so long just like a crueller.

[Joaniesmom]

I'll see around like a donut and so long just like a crueller.

I've given this a good deal of thought and think I'm going to ask for a little help on this one. :)

How about: "Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs"

My dear old Kentucky Daddy.

[graciegirl]

Nervous as a ho in church?

[ssmith]

Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater!

[anarick]

nervous as a porcupine in a balloon factory

[2BNTV]

How do you milk a porcupine? Very carefully.

[msendo]

Hi!
I'm a wannabe newbe,

Laura and Rob Petri came from New Rochelle, not too far from Danbury,Ct, but located in Westchester, NY.

Back on track-
My mother use to tell me " you're like six sheets in the wind."

[2BNTV]

Hi!
I'm a wannabe newbe,

Laura and Rob Petri came from New Rochelle, not too far from Danbury,Ct, but located in Westchester, NY.

Back on track-
My mother use to tell me " you're like six sheets in the wind."

:welcome: to TOTV. :smiley: Keep on posting.

Back on track:

You're as funny as a fart in a spacesuit.

[2BNTV]

I don't let people rent space in my head.

[anarick]

I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or going.

[ilovetv]

Don't know if these are in here already, but here goes:

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

No good deed goes unpunished.

[2BNTV]

Hell's bells.

[Dr Winston O Boogie jr]

Do you think I'm made of money?

Cut of your nose to spite your face.

[2BNTV]

Do you think money grows on trees?

I wish I had a dollar for every time I heard that phrase.

[anarick]

what am I - chopped liver?

[bluedog103]

Smoke 'em if you got 'em

[anarick]

here's smoke in your eyes

I think that's it.

[buzzy]

You bet your bippy

[anarick]

sock it to me

[anarick]

here come the judge

[Ripcord13]

Who do you think you are? King Farouk

[Pturner]

Kiss my grits.

[jblum315]

Mary and them come to dinner t'other day

[doowop58]

Stick around and we'll open a keg of nails

[doowop58]

Stick around and we'll, open a keg of nails

[2BNTV]

Close enough counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.

[chuckinca]

Indian Giver


.

[2BNTV]

Over the top, down the gums, lookout stomach here it comes.

[jblum315]

Always loved that one!

[chuckinca]

You're a** is grass.

.

[2BNTV]

You're a** is grass.

.

and I'm the lawnmower. :smiley:

[anarick]

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken

[chuckinca]

Whoa Nellie!


.

[Pturner]

Liar, liar pants on fire.

[anarick]

Liar, liar pants on fire.

Hanging on a telephone wire :a040:

[chuckinca]

Johnny come lately

Mark my words

Beatnik

Yuppie

[2BNTV]

Hanging by a thread.

[2BNTV]

He/She has more hang-ups than the telephone company.

[the square]

You can't unring a bell....

[George Bieniaszek]

The Masses Elect the A$$es!!!

[uujudy]

If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

[2BNTV]

Mom used to say, "it don't cost nutin to be nice".

[2BNTV]

My get-up and go has got up and gone. :smiley:

[2BNTV]

Let's bury the hatchet.

[2BNTV]

That cracks me up.

[Didiwinbob]

Here's yer hat what's your hurry

Don't let the door hit you on your way out.


Chris

[Didiwinbob]

I have/had freckles, my great uncle would hold my chin and say "did a cow sneeze on your face". I got tired of hearing this by the time I turned 10.


Chris

[Didiwinbob]

I brought you into this world and if you keep it up I'll take you out

Good night sleep tight don't let the bed bugs bite


Chris

[Didiwinbob]

You are the cat's meow


Chris

[Didiwinbob]

The light is on but no one's home (referring to someone that is ditsy)


Chris

[2BNTV]

Here's yer hat what's your hurry

Don't let the door hit you on your way out.

Chris

Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split ya!!!

George Jefferson

[Posh 08]

Was the dance worth the candles?

[2BNTV]

I'll eat your hat.

[anarick]

shiver my timbers

[anarick]

no **** Sherlock

[anarick]

shoot the moon

[Pturner]

My sixth grade teacher used to say,

"You're fast becoming what you're gonna be."

[anarick]

all Greek to me

[rmcpklinefelter]

...give a little, get a little...

[anarick]

he's got Van Gogh's ear for music.

[rmcpklinefelter]

...my friend Bev about stuck up guys: "You think you're hot stuff on a silver platter but you're just cold s**t on a paper plate".

[rmcpklinefelter]

...one of my favorites from my mom: "You can pick your friends but you can't pick your relatives"...

[anarick]

I just didn't fall off the turnip truck

[rmcpklinefelter]

...my dad when he walked in after working all day at the factory: "I can whip 30 Irishmen in 30 minutes...and 1 Dutchman".

[rmcpklinefelter]

...my Gramma about cleaning: "I've got to get rid of those round corners".

[pookieroo]

Uncle Tonoose was on the Danny Thomas show. He was I believe, a classically trained actor who had done plays onstage in NY for years. I can't remember his real name now. Maybe later.

[skyguy79]

Uncle Tonoose was on the Danny Thomas show. He was I believe, a classically trained actor who had done plays onstage in NY for years. I can't remember his real name now. Maybe later.Hans Conried played Uncle Tanoose.

Hans Conried - IMDb (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0175788/)

[skyguy79]

Has anyone mentioned the following sayings or expressions yet?

Dag-nabbit!
Holy-schmoley!
Hoochie-koochie!
Hot-diggity-dog!

[2BNTV]

son of a beach.

[2BNTV]

A penny for your thoughts.

[Cantwaittoarrive]

I might of been born at night but, it wasn't last night

[Cantwaittoarrive]

Eat everything on your plate some little boy in China is starving and would love to eat those peas (or whatever I left on my plate)

[graciegirl]

Too many mean things said, that sooner or later get back to a person and hurt them...

So my favorite one is............



Least said, soonest mended

Or in dialect it is "shut up you mouf".

[jackz]

He couldn't get lucky even if he was the warden in a womans prison with a handful of pardons..

[2BNTV]

Shut your face.........

[2BNTV]

Going around wily nily.

[BobnBev]

Like throwing gasoline on a fire..:loco:

[2BNTV]

Like oil and water.

[2BNTV]

Some people brighten a room when enetring and some when leaving.

[Cantwaittoarrive]

He's not the sharpest tac in the box

[Cantwaittoarrive]

I might of been born at night but it wasn't last night

[Cantwaittoarrive]

If brains were dynamite he couldn't blow his nose

[jblum315]

I loved Uncle Tonoose on the Danny Thomas show! Hans Conried played Uncle Tonoose, and I remember that he was from Lebanon. Whenever I hear of happenings in modern-day Lebanon I think of Uncle Tonoose.

On that same note, I was so surprised to discover that there really IS a Danbury, Connecticut! That's where Rob & Laura Petri lived.

To stay on track... Holy Toledo is a phrase we all used growing up in my area of Toledo. :ho:

I might be mistaken but I thought Rob and Laura lived in New Rochelle.

[Emery Eaton]

I was conducting a legacy video interview for my wife's great grandmother so we'd have her story and history on video, and she said, "If your great you don't have to tell anyone, they will know it"

She said her mother taught her that in the late 20's when she was a little girl bragging about herself. Since then she said she lived by that humbling Old Saying.

[2BNTV]

Your goose is cooked.

[OldDave]

Yes, Rob and Laura did live in New Rochelle. Rob's hometown was Danville, Illinois, (Dick Van Dyck's actual home town)

Old sayings:

I'll swan.
Laudy mercy.
Missed it by a country mile.
You were standing behind the barn door when the brains were passed out.
Turtle (meaning a car's truck) from my poor old step father from Arkansas.

[Cisco Kid]

Fine as frogs hair

[Cisco Kid]

I'll get after you like thunder after lightnin.

[Cisco Kid]

Bleedin' like a stuck hog

[Cisco Kid]

One lie brings the next one with it

[Cisco Kid]

Oil don’t wear out, just gits dirty.

[Cisco Kid]

They have a carburetor that gits 100 miles to a gallon, but the big oil companies bought it.

[Cisco Kid]

You could hear the chevy's rust"

[Cisco Kid]

Ford
Found on the road dead

[Cisco Kid]

"It's a doozy"

[Cisco Kid]

If you'd like to surprise her, get her a Kaiser.
If you'd like to amaze her, get her a Frazer.
Or... Just get her a Tucker.

[Cisco Kid]

"Red at Night, Sailor's Delight

[Cisco Kid]

"Red in the Morning, Sailors Take Warning"

[2BNTV]

It's just down the road apiece.

[LynnDeb]

I remember an old expression that is gratefully dead and gone:

"Children should be seen and not heard."

Thankfully, my parents never said that-- or saw it that way!

Oh yes my grandmother always said that

[LatDoc]

You can do whatever you want when you have your kids...
Meaning for now, you will do what we tell you.

[2BNTV]

I hated this one: Children should be seen and not heard.

[tpop1]

Holy Toledo!

(Remember Uncle Tonoose? What show was he on and what was the actor's name who played him!)

Hans Conried played Uncle Tonoose on the Danny Thomas Show - Make Room For Daddy!!!
_

[BarryRX]

Up your nose with a rubber hose.

Twice as far with a candy bar!

[BarryRX]

geez Louise!
23 skidoo
I see London, I see France, I can see your underpants!

[jblum315]

geez Louise!
23 skidoo
I see London, I see France, I can see your underpants!

I taught my granddaughters that last one during Christmas. They think it's hilarious. I warned them not to say it in school.

[2BNTV]

Beans, beans.
Good for the heart.
The more you eat.
The more you fart.

[Villages PL]

23 skidoo

:1rotfl:

[2BNTV]

She is in a family way.

My father used this saying when a woman was pregnant with child.

[marianne237]

stop making faces or they'll freeze that way

[kittygilchrist]

If a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his butt on the ground.

[2BNTV]

If a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his butt on the ground.

Reminds me of Mark Sanchez play, (Jets QB), when he ran into the butt of Brandon Moore and fumbled the football.

If you put the ball one the ground, you sit down - Bill Parcells

[2BNTV]

But it nice or buy it twice.