Scary

[Veronica]

Hi kitty,

this is my answer to your question as to why i find it so scary to move to tv alone from this town, where i grew up, which i hate. Every single member of my family is dead including my husband. I have no children. I have one aunt and uncle left, and they are co-dependent alcoholics. If something happens to me in tv, i have no support system there - no one to turn to for help. I have friends here in ct who would help me. This is why i am finding a move there so scary.

[kittygilchrist]

have you decided to move then or still thinking about it?

[Veronica]

Still thinking about it.have you decided to move then or still thinking about it?

[asianthree]

why not rent off season to see if you like it

[kittygilchrist]

Veronica,
moving here is not for everybody. I respect your fear and your trust in friends you have in CT. Not sure why you would move from that when you have lost so much already.

[redwitch]

Veronica, like you, I really didn't have anyone to rely on should the need arise. It took some time, but now I have a very good network of friends on whom I know I can call and ask for help. Even before truly having friends, I did have a group of women that would have helped me.

It isn't easy at first and it is definitely frightening to think about, but you can find folks to help you should the need arise, even if it is your first day in TV. That's one of the beautiful things here -- the generosity of spirit of Villagers, whether you're a total stranger or a best friend.

[Veronica]

Thanks so much, redwitch

veronica, like you, i really didn't have anyone to rely on should the need arise. It took some time, but now i have a very good network of friends on whom i know i can call and ask for help. Even before truly having friends, i did have a group of women that would have helped me.

It isn't easy at first and it is definitely frightening to think about, but you can find folks to help you should the need arise, even if it is your first day in tv. That's one of the beautiful things here -- the generosity of spirit of villagers, whether you're a total stranger or a best friend.

[kittygilchrist]

Dee, you are the best. It is a scary thing to do, moving here. Any of us not knowing a soul and being single are scared.
I wouldn't have moved if I needed help daily or might need immediate help.
KItty

[chachacha]

You can only walk half way into the darkest forest before you are coming out the other side....have courage, pray and discern what you would really like for yourself, and then walk in that direction. if it is to stay among friends, then rejoice in them...if it is to make a change and start a new adventure, then we will rejoice in you! :)

[senior citizen]

Veronica, like you, I really didn't have anyone to rely on should the need arise. It took some time, but now I have a very good network of friends on whom I know I can call and ask for help. Even before truly having friends, I did have a group of women that would have helped me.

It isn't easy at first and it is definitely frightening to think about, but you can find folks to help you should the need arise, even if it is your first day in TV. That's one of the beautiful things here -- the generosity of spirit of Villagers, whether you're a total stranger or a best friend.

Beautiful post......helpful and uplifting.......

[senior citizen]

You can only walk half way into the darkest forest before you are coming out the other side....have courage, pray and discern what you would really like for yourself, and then walk in that direction. if it is to stay among friends, then rejoice in them...if it is to make a change and start a new adventure, then we will rejoice in you! :)

More truly uplifting and inspirational advice for a person leaving or thinking of leaving her support network for the unknown...........

[SusanOfWoodbury]

Hi kitty,

this is my answer to your question as to why i find it so scary to move to tv alone from this town, where i grew up, which i hate. Every single member of my family is dead including my husband. I have no children. I have one aunt and uncle left, and they are co-dependent alcoholics. If something happens to me in tv, i have no support system there - no one to turn to for help. I have friends here in ct who would help me. This is why i am finding a move there so scary.

Veronica, I moved to The Villages, Aug 2012 and came by myself. I currently am a full time renter. I have made lots of dear friends since moving here. I still have my friends in NH/Maine, but, Florida is my home now. Was it scary to move here, yes, but, I would do it again..

I needed to way out the pros and cons for me and the pros won... But, I had to be proactive about meeting people.

Good Luck

[kittygilchrist]

Veronica, I moved here from a community I'd lived in since 1969. After 3 months, I have more support and friends here than where I moved from and could call on several people within a couple of miles if I had a problem like a flat or needed a ride or needed to talk. I've not been all that social on my street but while I walked my dog two (married) neighbor men surprised me by offering to help if I ever need them.
Is that the kind of support you are asking for?

[janieb]

You can only walk half way into the darkest forest before you are coming out the other side....have courage, pray and discern what you would really like for yourself, and then walk in that direction. if it is to stay among friends, then rejoice in them...if it is to make a change and start a new adventure, then we will rejoice in you! :)

Beautiful words

[DandyGirl]

Hi kitty,

this is my answer to your question as to why i find it so scary to move to tv alone from this town, where i grew up, which i hate. Every single member of my family is dead including my husband. I have no children. I have one aunt and uncle left, and they are co-dependent alcoholics. If something happens to me in tv, i have no support system there - no one to turn to for help. I have friends here in ct who would help me. This is why i am finding a move there so scary.

Part of your first sentence says it all to me "..where I grew up, which I hate.". I'd be out of there so fast and find a new adventure that would make me happy.

[kittygilchrist]

Hating a place IS a great reason to move and I missed that part of the post.

[SALYBOW]

VERONICA,
THE THING i HAVE NOTICED AVOUT TV IS THAT PEOPLE BECOME YOUR FRIENDS MORE QUICKLY THAN THEY DID UP NORTH, POSSIBLY BECAUSE WE HAVE MORE TIME TO SPEND TOGETHER. WHEN MY NEIGHBOR ACROSS THE STREET WAS DIAGNOSED WITH CANCER HER FRIENDS BOTH IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD AND OUTSIDE OF IT RALLIED TOGETHER TO GIVE HER THE HELP, SUPPORT AND PRAYERS SHE NEEDED. SHE ONLY KNEW MANY OF THEM FOR A SHORT WHILE. WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME SITUATION AND THAT ENCOURAGES ALL TO HELP ONE ANOTHER. It is not too hard to get friends here there are so many places to meet them.

[DianeM]

Veronica leaving your support circle is damned scary and something that every person who has moved has experienced. If you hate where you live - move! If you like your support circle more than you hate where you live - Stay! Only you can decide which is more important. Personally I would move back home in a heartbeat.

[Veronica]

yes, great advice. thanks so much chaX3.

More truly uplifting and inspirational advice for a person leaving or thinking of leaving her support network for the unknown...........

[marianne237]

Come down and try it for awhile. Renting for awhile is not making THE commitment. Only by trying to see what it's all about will you discover for yourself what you want. I'm a shy person, but made friends right away. My opinion is that since we've left old friends and family behind, that we're looking for new friends to fill in the missing pieces and it works. My neighbors helped my husband take care of me during my cancer scares and we now take care of a neighbor who became a widow 3 years ago. She is having cancer surgery next week and she doesn't have biological family here to help, but the "family" she's acquired while living here.

We take care of each other. That's part of living here.

[senior citizen]

Come down and try it for awhile. Renting for awhile is not making THE commitment. Only by trying to see what it's all about will you discover for yourself what you want. I'm a shy person, but made friends right away. My opinion is that since we've left old friends and family behind, that we're looking for new friends to fill in the missing pieces and it works. My neighbors helped my husband take care of me during my cancer scares and we now take care of a neighbor who became a widow 3 years ago. She is having cancer surgery next week and she doesn't have biological family here to help, but the "family" she's acquired while living here.

We take care of each other. That's part of living here.

A beautiful post indeed.

[Veronica]

each and every post on this tread is beautiful to me, and i thank you all for taking the time to respond. your responses are really very helpful, and the advice was great, in my opinion. tv is full of beautiful people - just another reason why i wish i lived there!

[redwitch]

Veronica, here's some personal examples of how we help each other.

I was riding my scooter and got a flat tire. A bicyclist stopped and offered to help. I explained I had a flat and no way to fix it and my phone was dead (stupid me). He rode to Sweet Bay, bought a can of Fix-It Flat, came back and fixed the flat for me. He refused to even take any money for the product (and then gave me the can, "Just in case!").

My daughter's clutch went out in her car. A landscaper stopped and helped her so that she could drive it to a mechanic to get it fixed.

One of my dearest friends was dying from congestive heart failure. Her game group rallied around her, visited her every day at the hospital, at rehab and at home until her daughter came to take her to stay with her until she died. She made one comment that broke my heart, "I didn't know so many people loved me." The reality is we did care, tremendously, and were glad to be there for her.

Yesterday, I couldn't reach my friend who was supposed to come to Crisper's but didn't. When she didn't answer either her home or cell phone, I rushed (with another friend who didn't even know her) to her home. Fortunately, all was well. Today, we're taking the friend who came with me to the airport so that she doesn't have to take the shuttle.

This is the heart of TV -- not the developer, not the homes, not the activities, the people, the caring, the kindness. Strangers help strangers. Acquaintances jump in when needed. Friends are the family that isn't here.

[marianne237]

Veronica....we're waiting to meet and greet