Where Did Kindness and Courtesy Go?
 

At the risk of getting slammed with criticism, can't help but post this concern. In my golf cart on Friday on the cart path behind Laurel Manor - going to turn left into Winifred (admit I didn't put my turn signal on :oops:). Nobody on the road except for the guy behind me. I turned left and apparently he didn't like that I did it without a turn signal on. He proceeded to shout obscenities at the top of his lungs for the next block. :rant-rave: I finally turned in the opposite direction he was going just to avoid his rantings. Low and behold, a few minutes later I was waiting for traffic to clear at the intersection of Buena Vista and Sumter Lake Miona entrance. Apparently I didn't cross fast enough for the man behind me who proceeded yet again to yell at me. What is happening in this country of so many blessings that we have become so unkind and inconsiderate of others. Must have been something in the air that day. For me, I will just hope for the future to be better and forgive the obviously grumpy old men who felt compelled to be rude.

I agree, There are some grumpy old people out there. I guy yelled at me for "no directional" the other day..... I had given a hand signal before turning (he must have though I was waving to someone) well he almost got another :censored: hand signal. :icon_wink:

Throw him a kiss and yell, “I love you too!” …well, at least that’s what hubby would do.

Or you could have said your sorry and defused the situation from the get go

I hear ya OP.

One day wife & I were out riding on the multi-modal path just to enjoy the sunset. She was behind me about 50 ft.
She had to make an emergency stop. When I noticed, I made a U-turn to go back to her. Literally no one else was around. By the time I did this, she was well out of the way of all possible path traffic, off on the right side of the path in the grass, where I joined her.

Then, along comes Super Villager Ken & Barbie, speeding along in their purple neon illuminated golf cart.
Barbie began yelling cuss words at me, repeatedly flipping me off, all for the abomination of "facing the F%^n wrong way"
They having no idea my wife was having an emergency, and my 'facing the wrong way (off path) was due to my turning around to help her.
We were blocking/disrupting absolutely no one!

Lets just say, it was good for them, my wife's issue was more important than my need to set things straight with either one of them as they sped off, no doubt to save the village paths, from all evils of the world, one uncalled for drive by cussing out at a time! :throwtomatoes:

I probably meet one hundred people a month or so for brief periods of time but only less than 5% really cause any kind of problems for others.

It is when those 5% join a club, the same club, that things start going downhill.

Similar "travesties' of kindness" have happened to me, not worth mentioning. It seems to me that some folks are just filled up with garbage and they are constantly looking for a place to dump some of it off. Who knows what has happened to them. I tend to think, for whatever reason, their lives are not what they had hoped for. Fortunately, they are in the minority, most folks are kind and helpful.

Try to have a nice day….
 

There are so many great and friendly people in TV that when you run across a grump it is surprising and makes you think there are many. My experience is that they are the underwhelming minority and would be nasty grumps regardless of where they lived or their mode of transportation. “Try to have a nice day” is my current response.. for the especially nasty or repeat offender “Bless your Heart” seems to work for me ….

That was your introduction to the MINORITY of The Villages.

:gc:

You may think not signaling or not driving at a normal pace is not enough for a "grumpy" person to be annoyed at, but it probably would have prevented you from getting a driver's license decades ago, right? I'm all for admitting "My bad" by putting up my hand to let people know I was in the wrong. Peace!!!

Have faith my friend… there is good out there we just have to look for it sometimes.

I’ve seen & heard similar rude comments - I think some get spoiled here in the bubble and the land of milk & honey and get grumpy at the 1st thing that doesn’t go their way or they think is wrong.

For what it’s worth - let them stew in their own toxic mess and don’t let it get to you (easier said than done) — they have to live in their own madness all the time and the rest of us try to not let it be infectious.

It’s not much to offer - but I agree with you and it’s unfortunate. That said, life is too short to let jerks ruin our day.

Respectfully, DB

This starting getting worse around October 1st. More traffic plus the snowbirds and lost renters that don’t care to learn the customs and courtesies for living here. I’m surprised more have not run down a bunch of carts or bicyclists or bicyclists with their carts yet.

Most people here are just fine. But one thing I have noticed, When I am on a street like Hillsboro when the driving lane and golf cart lane merge and I am on my golf cart merging (turn signal is on), more and more drivers will cut me off even though they entered the lane after me. Never used to see that before.

Unfortunately, Stu, Anoles like this don't accept sorry. They only want to rant. Sign of the times.

Same Rude Thing Happened to Me....Driving my Golf Cart
 

Coming home from water volleyball I got behind a gal that was going 15-16 miles per hour and I decided to go around this gal and her dog. As I passed I did a kind wave to say thanks for letting me pass and she laid on the horn! What!!! I was trying to be friendly. It's shocking how some people think being ugly is ok....where are their manners?

Where is the fun in that? Give 'em the "gesture" and tell them, "and the horse you rode in on". But smile, real big.
😀

Many people in Florida and the Villages think you can relax and not be responsible when driving....I"d remind you that driving is a full time responsibility and requires full time attention. The rules are the same for everyone and if you are lax and irresponsible you put someone in potential jeopardy. You don't have that right! If you don't know the rules..LEARN THEM...You don't stop learning just because you are in The Villages or Florida and are older. Driving a car, golf cart, bicycle or walking requires constant attention. You cannot fall asleep just because traffic has stopped or because you want to make up your own rules. The speeds are designed for everybody, not for you to decide how fast or slow you wish to go because of your mood. Going too slow is just as bad as going too fast! Don't even get me started on the number of companies that don't have proper lighting on trailers etc.

everywhere and always there are people who want the world to be the way they think the world should be. . . like as predictable as the sun and the moon and the tides. The natural world has pretty small variances, human behavior, ugh, has very wide variances from the average. Its what makes humans so great, the unlimited creativity to be different, both average and not so average.

embrace that you have different priorities and just go on your way. don't make their issues your issues. . . stick to your issues, we all have them. . my issue might have to do with the act of preparing and filing taxes. . .

live and let live guy

"As people age, they become more like themselves". My gerontologist friend introduced me to that concept decades ago, and there is a lot of wisdom in it.

What that means basically is that when we're young(er) for the most part we have the ability to present the face that we WANT to present, to the world. Someone may feel seething anger inside over some real or imagined word or deed by another, but mostly we grit our teeth, give that person a cold smile and wisely remove ourselves from the situation. However as age starts wearing on us so too do our coping skills start to diminish as well as emotional control, often exacerbated by things like family or money issues, alcohol, chronic disease, beginning dementia, etc. We can no longer hide the person we've carefully kept hidden all those decades. He (or she) gradually starts peeking out, more and more often, and quite often incidents like the one in the OP happen.

I'm not saying this was the case in the incident described in the OP. But we're a town of 150,000 (give or take) geezers. So yes. In such a concentration incidents like this WILL happen. Best thing to do is precisely what the person being verbally attacked did. Leave. Don't escalate.

Very often that is true but worth a try but she should have apologized for her error instead it escalated.

We all make mistakes apologize and move on. If he continues it is on him.

:faint: How is going too slow bad? Have yet to see in my lifetime a report of a traffic accident where the person in the accident was cited for going slow. That argument is always used by people who break the law by speeding.

Lately
 

Did not hear that in the summer seems mainly whoever comes down now

As our parents aged they seemed to become more vocal and we were told that happens because we (they) lose their filter. My mom used to tell us kids to change our attitudes or we'd be worse when we got old. BOTH of these are oh.so.correct.
NOT excusing behaviors but I think that people don't get this way just because they move here. They bring their bad habits with them. Think of the drivers....do you think they did the same stuff back home?? IF they never used their blinkers or adhered to speed laws or the signs there---they won't all of a sudden here. Frustrating for the rest of us...yes!!
As a side note---the one (of many) experiences I've had driving my golf cart happened at the intersection of Colony Dr. and the MMT that went past Palmer. It was a weekend. We were the leading cart and were stopped. The traffic going both ways into Colony or to Buena Vista was extremely busy. A guy about 2 or 3 carts behind us was impatient and yelled expletives at us about not moving. Guess he'd rather be further inconvenienced by a catastrophic traffic accident than make progress in his day.

I totally agree. It’s hard to understand why so many old retired people are in such a hurry. Also, the climate now in the last few years seems to be one in which people feel free to deal with their anger in an aggressive way.

The car is already in the traffic lane from the get go. The onus is on the merging vehicle when there is a merge, which is the golf cart. The car, in the main traffic lane should adjust there speed accordingly, to facilitate the merge, when possible. When in the cart lane at a merge and the car is closing fast, I let the car go. If you're talking about the car going around you in the oncoming lane, that's a different story.

On grumps, during my first golf card ride in the villages last year a friend who was taking me around with his enhanced cart mentioned that a few times when he passed others they gave the finger. Currently I have yet to encounter anyone yelling at me on my cart for anything, but they'll need to shout above Van Halen on volume 11.:cool:

If the passed cart was doing 20 mph which is the speed limit, there is no reason to pass them. Unless your friend has a street legal cart, which is allowed to go 25 mph. What does "enhanced" mean ?

I suspect their anger has not so much to do with traffic, as their arthritis, bad knee etc. many people get grumpy when in chronic pain.

Just smile with the inner knowledge that you will continue on with your happy life, living in an amazing place. He, on the other hand, will continue on to wallow in whatever cesspit of a life he has created for himself. Don't follow the jerk down the rabbit hole.

How????

On interstate highways and other high speed limited access roads, the NUMBER ONE cause of accidents is slow drivers, particularly in the left lane. They might not be involved directly in a crash, but they certainly CAUSE them as other drivers scramble to get around what is essentially a road obstruction. Now some bozo will respond with the trite "We're retired, what's the rush?". Not the point, the point is that these clowns don't get to dictate speed to everyone else on the road----that's what the speed limit sign, determined by a legislature in consultation with traffic engineers are responsible for.

Thank you for sharing your desire to forgive. You’re doing more than hoping for the future. You’re contributing to a better future.

Means he had it turned up to go over 19.

:agree:

I'm usually somewhere between the fastest driver on the road and the slowest, and prefer not to be stuck behind the slowest.

There are so many angry people out there. I tend to ignore those that are mean-spirited and foul mouthed. You never know who could start shooting. Such scary times. .

Well said, surprised so many do not understand the problem with driving under the speed limit.

Its the CULT. They are all over TV, just like cockroaches kill one and a dozen show up.

Thanx for the less than 1% unfriendly persons report.
From those of us in the over 99% in TV.

______________________________________________

:censored:

My personal opinion is that bad driving, distracted driving, and discourteous driving are side effects of the Pandemic. Many people (not all) have acquired a slight anti-social mindset after Covid. And they are taking out their aggressions and frustrations when they are behind the wheel of a vehicle. I am not sure why, but I would hope that there is some ongoing psychological research on this possibility. And if there is a TRUE link there, then I would like to see a book come out about it.

i seem to have noticed that after the Pandemic, vehicle speeding has become almost universal. It is like many drivers are saying that the Virus did NOT respect them and limited their life activities ........so NOW its payback time......they will drive as if they have NO respect for other drivers. Drivers have become nasty with a chip on their shoulders. They drive without empathy and are predisposed to being RUDE and aggressive.

I have seen commercial vehicles and older residents driving at around 50 mph on 20 mph narrow residential streets with blind curves.

Interesting theory that may have some merit. There were bad and discourteous drivers prior to the pandemic, and distracted drivers led to cell phone while driving laws in many states pre-pandemic. But I agree, it just seems much worse

A perfect example occurred about 2 months ago. I was driving south on the BV MMP in my cart, and I saw another cart headed toward the stop sign where a tunnel ramp merged into the main MMP. It did not appear that he was going to stop, and he didn't, shooting right in front of me as I simultaneously braked into a skid and leaned on the horn. In return he gave a one-finger salute. At the next stop sign at the gate crossing, I pulled behind him and relatively politely reminded him that the large, red, octagonal sign with STOP on it really means just that. His response was "blow it out my @$$". I was briefly tempted to acquaint that part of his anatomy with my 7 iron, sideways, but concluded that not only this jerk wasn';t worth it, but my 7 iron is more valuable than he is.

I used to go to a Philosophy club. And I person (out of about 20) totally dominated about 70% of all discussions And he did not EVEN have interesting comments. I gave up after about 5 sessions. The group moderator made little attempt to prevent that one-person domination. So 1 out of 20......there is your 5%.

I also remember going to a water volleyball group for years. There was 1 person that I HATED to be on the same team with. He was a pretty good player, but by far NOT the best. He decided that he was a SELF-APPOINTED COACH for anybody or everybody that made a mistake during play. One day he got on me and I could NOT take it anymore. i screamed out for him to NEVER say another word to me........which he did. Later after play, many people came up to me and said that it was a wonder that no one had ever called him out before. I mean he was OBNOXIOUS !

So, I have seen examples of how 5 % of a group can ruin the whole group. Note.......I have also noticed from being in many group activities that IF the group leader is a WOMAN the activities are run more smoothly and better led. Just my personal observation.