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-   -   what is your biggest concern about being alone? (https://www.talkofthevillages.com/forums/singles-124/what-your-biggest-concern-about-being-alone-114565/)

senior citizen 05-15-2014 05:54 AM

Amen A very nice upbeat story
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by KathieI (Post 877934)
I moved here 6 years ago as a single woman after having been married for 30 years. I don't have any children so its just me. There are times when I have felt slightly lonely, not often because of all the great friends I have here. I don't have any family close by but I consider my friends, my family. I love being single and doing the things I like to do without answering to anyone. Two years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and all those wonderful friends came to my rescue. They were all here for me and actually had a list of caregivers to look after me while in recovery. I could not have asked for more!!!

I love hugging friends when I meet up with them, its very important for me to show how much I value their friendship. As far as the future, it is only in God's hands, but if I were to have some major illness, I would hope that I have set up the proper plan for my care whether it be in Assisted Living or whatever.

To Mixsonci and others, you will be able to develop a large group of friends here, if you so desire, who will be there for you to take you to the ER, call you everyday to make sure your okay, and drive you to doctors appts when they need you to have a ride home. This is all with friends who I have met here in TV. I feel I am truly blessed with wonderful friends and so far, this is exactly why I moved here.

Now, let's move on to a happier subject, lol.





Amen. A truly very nice upbeat story and happy ending to your own personal journey.

Could it be you have so many wonderful friends because you are a "genuinely nice" lady?

I think so.......

May you live a hundred years.....Per cent'anni
For a hundred years









Lauren Sweeny 05-15-2014 07:35 AM

I was single until I was 42. Most of my friends were married or in a relationship during the years. I began to think there was no " Prince Charming" going to come to sweep me off my feet. I began to plan how I would and could live a full and happy life.
Loving oneself and getting out into the world helped me understand relationships and personal needs. I did a lot of volunteering and community work.
I can honestly say that having good close friends to count on , made the future more comfortable.
The fact that one can call these friends in time of need is reassuring. Closeness in terms of physical contact can be a minor issue,but if I needed a hug I asked these close friends to give me them. Think about what you do with your time and who your true friends are. If you need a friend here in the villages PM me and we will all meet up ! Everyone needs a good friend ( I had a dog during my single years... Lots of doggy kisses !) You are not alone !

quirky3 05-15-2014 07:44 AM

One of my main concerns is who will take care of my pets if anything happens to me short term or long term.

I did notice that Sumter County has a free daily check-in service that I plan to use when I move there. (352-689-4600)

As for physical contact, it is not the same as romance, but getting regular massages from a licensed, caring massage therapist is indeed good therapy!

Pointer 05-15-2014 07:47 AM

I think it's a lot easier to be single here then other places. After 34 years of marriage and the kids all "launched" and on their own, I found myself on my own. WHAT?!? I've recently found TV (Jan.) and love everything about it. Slowly finding my way and my self again. This site has been a good way for me to find out whats going on. Thank you all.

RETIREDSFW 05-15-2014 10:05 AM

i want my hug for today.

gerryann 05-15-2014 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RETIREDSFW (Post 878109)
i want my hug for today.

Here ya go! :)

{{{{ }}}}

OldManTime 05-15-2014 11:48 AM

"I have Fallen…and can't get up"

RETIREDSFW 05-15-2014 04:51 PM

:mademyday:Thanks Gerryann for my hug.

asianthree 05-15-2014 04:53 PM

my biggest fear is no one to blame on who left the dishes in the sink

kittygilchrist 05-15-2014 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by asianthree (Post 878364)
my biggest fear is no one to blame on who left the dishes in the sink

yeah, I couldn't believe it after my divorce umpteen years ago....HE was not making all the messes. However, tripping over MY shoes was far less irritating than tripping over his.

re the topic, some of us don't like to ask for help. I'm trying to get over that.

elbear 05-15-2014 06:46 PM

There really are many ways to feel alone in a relationship or not. We all need both time alone and time with others, quality time and we also need people who will be there for us if needed.

Sounds like there would be enough interest for a club, perhaps named Not Alone.

chachacha 05-15-2014 08:51 PM

there actually was a club U R Not Alone for widows and widowers. but i started this thread to also celebrate the good things about being on one's own. did not mean it to be a downer! as Diane M said, it is what it is, so deal with it! that is very true. i think our attitude and what we do to make ourselves happy makes all the difference...for example, for years i was putting off travel waiting for that "special someone" with whom to take a dream trip! but last year i took my daughter and two granddaughters to italy and paris and it was just wonderful!! showing our loved ones the places we love is a great feeling. so now i no longer feel i lack a travel partner! my daughter cannot wait to go back to italy next year :) problem solved! :)

mixsonci 05-16-2014 08:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chachacha (Post 878478)
there actually was a club U R Not Alone for widows and widowers. but i started this thread to also celebrate the good things about being on one's own. did not mean it to be a downer! as Diane M said, it is what it is, so deal with it! that is very true. i think our attitude and what we do to make ourselves happy makes all the difference...for example, for years i was putting off travel waiting for that "special someone" with whom to take a dream trip! but last year i took my daughter and two granddaughters to italy and paris and it was just wonderful!! showing our loved ones the places we love is a great feeling. so now i no longer feel i lack a travel partner! my daughter cannot wait to go back to italy next year :) problem solved! :)

Sorry, but in light of this post, and the attitude of "it is what it is, so deal with it" I must ask, Why bother to ask the question in the first place of "What is your biggest concern about being alone" did you expect just happy answers? Maybe you should have asked "What makes you happiest about being alone" I can assure you my answer would have been much different. I love my alone time and I love my life, but that is not what you asked!

manaboutown 05-16-2014 08:33 AM

My biggest concern about been alone is the possible eventuality of facing a serious medical emergency such as a heart attack or stroke and being unable to function well enough to call 911 or otherwise seek help. Of course one could face such a situation while being married. Most of us have lost married friends whose spouses were not present or able to assist them during an event which caused their demise.

Other than that I feel what I miss most about not being in a relationship is the absence of regular physical and mental contact which bring about feelings of comfort and well being. Too, I miss having someone with whom to share my life. Having close friends and one or more pets as well as getting hugs really helps though.

Being single does have its advantages as the OP mentioned. I enjoy the freedom to do what I please without having to run it by a partner or obtain the partner's approval. In particular I have traveled extensively as a single and enjoyed doing so enormously.

As previously posted being alone does not equate to being lonely. The loneliest I ever felt was toward the end of a long and difficult marriage.

Madelaine Amee 05-16-2014 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by manaboutown (Post 878603)
My biggest concern about been alone is the possible eventuality of facing a serious medical emergency such as a heart attack or stroke and being unable function well enough to call 911 or otherwise seek help. Of course one could face such a situation while being married. Most of us have lost married friends whose spouses were not present or able to assist them during an event which caused their demise.

There is no guarantee with anything - I have two close friends who both had strokes in the night while in bed with their spouse and both are totally incapacitated because the spouse had no idea that the partner was in trouble and needed help.


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