Cyberstalk
 

Worth reading.
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Gracie was my first....
 

TOTV was the first forum site I ever engaged in. After some time, I got this friend request from this user named ‘Gracie girl’. I accepted as I can always use a new friend even if virtual. She was my very first friend on TOTV… or any forum for that matter.

There is no question she makes TOTV a better site and I hope she finds her way back.

PS1. You never forget your first.
PS2. I remember my wife asking at the time, who is this Gracie girl :laugh:?

Glad you put that up. It gets kind of complicated when the person doing the stalking is in another State or maybe even country.

I do understand GracieGirl's being very upset about the breach of trust when someone pretends to be a friend. Bet almost all of us have gone through that kind of a feeling.

Dearest Gracie, when I read your post, it felt like a loved member of my family had been attacked. It pains me that you have been hurt. I am sending you my love and affection and lots of hugs.
Barry

It's been done. Not by me, but by someone who is rated as being at the "Sage" level on TOTV.

Well done!

:clap2: :coolsmiley:

Gracie, I've been off TOTV for a bit and I just found this thread for the first time. Having scanned through all of the post I can say that there has been numerous statements said that I would agree with. No need for me to repeat them.

I've seen the Topix thread but have only been out there maybe 3 or 4 times. I was not only appalled by the imaturity of those children making the posts, but was also very surprised to see that even I was mentioned once in them. They said that they "think skyguy79 is one of her friends," like I was one of your (so-called) co-conspirators (to their thinking.) However, I was not upset by that statement simply because... well, it's true! I know you know how Eileen, I and the kitties feel about you and the entire family, so there's no need for me to go verbalizing it for you.

Now there is one mistake you made in your OP, and that's by saying you're "signing off from here." Yes! That's a mistake because it leaves those immature children (mentally or otherwise) laughing their body part (that could use a good swift kick) off.

Gracie, you and I have shared and consoled each other in separate incidents with a few other TOTV posters in the past that have hurt both of us deeply. But this one your going through now, well, as they say... "Boy, if this doesn't bake the cake!"

Having been through a similar situation, the lengthy time it took to figured out who the actual culprit was, (statements were made that led me to believe it could unbelievably be a friend on Facebook (fortunately it wasn't) and how I couldn't even post on TOTV until I did find out) I know it's going to take time for you to dissipate the deep hurt, but I'm sure it will, and will quicker because of so many good friends you see posting in support of you. I really, really hope that will be soon!

Love, Joe & Eileen

p.s. Feel fee to call anytime if you need an ear to talk to. I'll have Eileen run one of mine over to you ASAP! Smile! :)

Gracie, Even tho I don't know you, I feel like I do. I have thought many times after reading your posts, that I wish I did know you. Please don't deprive all of us of your wonderful input and your kind words!

Very sorry to learn about such a hateful and childish act committed against you Gracie. I do not know you other than reading your postings. In my opinion, there is no justification for such a cowardly act. Have peace in the knowledge the majority of those on this forum support and admire you as a good person with a big heart and only a coward would attempt to hurt it.

I'm writing this because I'm sure some of you saw my name on Topix. FYI...I only used brightspot01 and never posted under a different alias. I am still a member of Topix, to this day, but only because I forgot about it and never cancelled. I joined in November, 2008 and my last post was on April 6, 2009...a total of 18 posts...an average of 2.5 a month...and almost 5 years ago.

I joined Topix because I was banned from TOTV and a new forum had been established, mainly for those of us who Talk Host had banned from TOTV. Our purpose was to promote the new site but that got detoured on Topix.

Once on Topix, another TOTV poster immediately got on and posted some negative posts. The alias used was changed often (even impersonating TOTV Talk Host) and I was certain I knew the poster. The poster called me a bully. I probably was because the poster was very negative, aggressive, and mean (mainly on TOTV). Sadly, I lowered to the level of the poster and became very defensive. I look back and know I could and should have handled the situation better but that is now water under the bridge and I regret it.

I'd like to explain why Talk Host banned me. JohnnyM was banned and he had been a very popular poster. In fact, he made many of us over into movie stars using a special program. Everyone seemed to love JohnnyM. However, Johnny could be a little outspoken so Talk Host banned him (I never knew the specifics). Once other posters noticed Johnny was no longer posting they asked where he was. I posted that he had been banned. That was my doom and Talk Host banned me. Talk Host sent me a PM and said it was no one else's business what happened to Johnny and was between him and Johnny only. Johnny had given me permission to post that he was banned but that made no difference to Talk Host. I was gone and HE NEVER WOULD REINSTATE ME NO MATTER HOW OFTEN I PLEADED.

As for other banned members...JustSusan was a relatively new member. She is a Village Artist and her work is now displayed at King's Gallery in Spanish Springs. She has been featured in The Daily Sun often. She is a nice, low-key, honest lady. Unfortunately, she decided to tell a story about a dream she had (I think it might have been in "Girl Talk" but I could be wrong.). Unfortunately it was about trains. At the time, Talk Host was trying to sell his home in Chatham and had a problem with the noisy trains that passed close to his home. Once she posted her dream train story, Talk Host banned her, even though she honestly did it without malice (not knowing about Talk Host's train problem because she wasn't on that often.)

I could tell you other "banned" stories but I won't because this could turn into a novel. However, I want to thank the new administrators for reinstating me under my original name. I rejoined TOTV under a new alias but it never felt right. I wrote the new administrator, explained my situation, and asked for a 2nd chance to reinstate myself under my original name. He granted me my request and I'm so grateful.

ABOUT GRACIE: If I feel this horrible about the posts on TOPIX then I can only imagine how horrible she feels. I am a sensitive lady and these posts on TOPIX would have devastated me. I can't blame her for her reaction. I want Gracie to know I wrote the Administrators of Topix regarding this degrading and bullying thread. If she would like to see what I said, I will be glad to copy and PM my statement (and request) to her.

What's the rush?

Gracie I just PM'd you. Regards Mainlander

OMG, I am absolutely stunned by this terrible turn of events! Gracie: my heart is breaking for you right now. There is NO ONE who deserves to be hurt as you have, and YOU, of all people, should NEVER have to be subjected to hate and bullying. You are kind, loving, thoughtful, generous, genuine, and I'm betting 99.9 percent of TOTVers absolutely LOVE you!! I've been a "lurker" on this forum for a long time and have even been the very lucky recipient of a couple of PMs from you. I am so honored by that, and I am honored to read your wonderful posts here on TOTV. However, you are devastated and hurt right now, and I'm sure it will take some time to get over it. I know nothing about this Topix forum that has been referenced, but obviously, good people need to stay away from it. Apparently, no good can come from it. If something like that can cause such hurt, why would anyone want to be involved with it? Please, just forget that nasty forum, and take time to heal, but please know that there are many, many friends of yours who are praying that you will once again see the good there is here at TOTV, and come back and join us again. We love you Gracie, and I will be keeping you in my prayers. You are truly a treasure, and you do not deserve this awful hurt. Love to you, Helene and Sweetie! And God bless you all.

Thank you for sharing this. I also went thru the process you did. Banning in those days had no fair or consistent method to it. It does now, so like you I regret some of what I posted in those days. Due to the way TOTV is monitored today, I have sent apologies out, forgave those that harassed me, built my bridge and have moved on.

Dear ones.


I have only read a few of your kind and caring and concerned posts and I want you to know that I am fine. The wonderful thing about being older is that we have had experience with being badly hurt and know that in a few days we feel better. The feeling better has been greatly aided by some wonderful visits from wonderful people and by some wonderful emails by wonderful people and living with two wonderful people.


I feel responsible for this somehow. On forums where unknown people type to other unknown people without the facial contact and personal knowledge of each other enormous pain can be caused without intent. We all have disagreed at times with others and at our age we all have very clear ideas about what we believe. I must have somehow really said something unknowingly or knowingly that I believed or I pushed back against someone's ideas that caused this.


I have only read a few of the comments above because my heart is just overwhelmed with gratitude for your kindness. I have learned something very important. This medium is both dangerous and wonderful and I am glad for my 74 years. I can see why the young can be broken to the point of taking their own lives.


I certainly do not deserve the love you have shown me but I am so grateful for it.


I just love you. Thank you so much. I want to hug each of you.


Thank you so very much.


I have learned a great lesson.


There is even MORE good in the world than I thought.

Good morning Gracie
:spoken:

Gracie, what has happened too you has had an incredible effect on so many of us. I for one will never hesitate to apologize when I do wrong and will always forgive anyone doing harm to me if they ask for it. So very sorry what you have experienced, but I truly believe you have been the inspiration to improve the attitude of us all.

Gracie, welcome back.

This has no doubt been a difficult couple of days. We can't do anything about what is posted on other sites, but will continue to work hard to keep TOTV a model of web forum civility and respect, while still having fun. The outpouring of support here is much more indicative of the real world than a few isolated mean-spirited people.


You get the final say.... This thread is now closed.