[Mikeod]

Perhaps an oldie, but a goodie.


While playing a fine links course, and shooting a pretty fair score until the 18th, Bob, the vacationing golfer, hooks his tee shot onto the beach.
As he scrambles over the dunes, down to the waters edge in an effort to see if the ball is playable, he spies a glint of metal in the sand. Curious, he stoops down and discovers an old gilded oil lamp. He picks it up, and is brushing the sand from it when it starts to buck and jumps out of his hands…and a large plume of vapor emits from it that solidifies into a genie.
'You have freed me from the lamp' says the genie, 'and I may grant one wish for you.'
"Well", says Bob, "I love to play golf and I love to travel…I've always wanted to visit Hawaii and play those island courses, but I'm afraid to fly and get really seasick…so if you could build a highway from Los Angeles to Hawaii, I could drive there and realize my travel and golf dream…"
The genie gives a heavy sigh and visibly sags…he sits down on the dune, pulls out a cigarette and lights up…
"OK Bob. let me explain a little bit about Genie Magic. Though you've heard fantastic tales about wishes being granted, and stuff materializing out of thin air all we Genies can really do is gather and organize things that already exist…do you know how deep those ocean trenches are and how much concrete and steel will be needed for supports that reach down that far???…and the asphalt…think of how much will be needed to cover a roadbed for a highway over 2500 miles long just so you can play golf…please, I beg you, save me a lot of work and all of those resources and wish for something else…"
"Well then", says Bob, " I don't want to mess up the planet or make so much trouble for you….how about this…women have always been a mystery to me…can you give me insight into what women really want?"
The genie stubs out his cigarette, rolls up his sleeves and says " Do you want two lanes or four lanes?"