[Rebel Pirate]

The bartender says "Sorry we don't serve time travelers here."
. . . . . .
So a time traveler walks into a bar...

[CFrance]

Originally Posted by Rebel Pirate

The bartender says "Sorry we don't serve time travelers here."
. . . . . .
So a time traveler walks into a bar...

Excellent!

[tomwed]

Originally Posted by LianaB

or maybe not

AKA Poppin' Fresh, served in World War 1.

[mgjim]

911 Operator: What is your emergency?
Caller: My wife is going into labor and I'm not sure what to do.
911 Operator: Is this her first baby?
Caller: No, this is her husband.

[Cisco Kid]

To all who received a book as a Christmas present from me ......., a gentle reminder ...they're due back at the library on Wed

[tomwed]

Originally Posted by Matzy

Actually those are not jokes, just signs posted somewhere (I got it by email, too) but made me smiling:

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
**************************
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
**************************
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
**************************
At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for,
you've come to the right place."
**************************
On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
**************************
On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
**************************
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
"Invite us to your next blowout."
**************************

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
**************************
In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
**************************
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
**************************
At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet -miss a car payment."
**************************
Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
**************************
In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
**************************
At the Electric Company
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be delighted."
**************************
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry;
come on in and get fed up."
**************************
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
**************************
At a Propane Filling Station:
"Thank heaven for little grills."
**************************
And don't forget the sign at a
CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:
"Best place in town to take a leak."
**************************
And the best one for last............
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"

or the Wisconsin bumper sticker that reads "Honk if you love cheeses"

[tomwed]

How do you make Antifreeze?
You hide her nightie.

[MikeV]

Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar? They each got six months.

[tomwed]

Originally Posted by MikeV

Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar? They each got six months.

That was pretty week.

[mgjim]

I hate spelling errors. Mix up two little letters and the whole sentence is urined.

[LianaB]

Ain't it the truth?

[jsw14]

How did the farmer find his wife?

He Tractor down