05-11-2023, 09:59 AM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 408
Thanks: 555
Thanked 425 Times in 197 Posts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pairadocs
Agree ! For those out there with some background in human psychology and personality; it's sometimes interesting to ponder comments at a deeper than surface level. Not trying to get too "Freudian", but according to statistics this is a community with a higher than average educational level, so most have probably at least had one psychology course post high school. Why DO (some) people have to have the "last word" ? Why DO (some) people refute the experiences of others, but give no foundational evidence ? Why do people feel compelled to give advice NOT asked for and/or do all they can to insist others do as they have done ? (LEAVE your "stuff" where you are, buy all NEW "STUFF" here.... obviously that made one person very happy, another might experience deep regret). The point of this is there are much better ways to express one's self. One of the best is to is to "share" a thought or opinion, NOT issue a written directive in a manner to (as you said) belittle others. For extreme examples of this type of personal insecurity, there is an on line "news paper" that posts every negative they can find concerning the villages (not so much about other retirement communities, but some). Reading the "comments" following the "articles" is most enlightening, and illustrates the EXTREME need some have to "trash" others in an attempt to feel better about their own life, choice of location, career, etc. Calling an entire population of ANY retirement community, or town, or traditional development such things as "idiots", "entitled trash", "drunks", etc. only illustrates the internal issues of the writer ! To a lesser degree, some posters on totv's are going to display the same characteristics, elevating themselves (in their own minds) not by the wisdom of their thoughts, but by diminishing others. When people begin comments with "YOU"..... that can be a red flag. When people post comments with ... I or We... and then relate their experience, it is a more civil exchange of ideas ! "YOU should cook at home then", or "YOU should move as soon as possible" say a lot about the poster. Writing "We have found buying quality ingredients and preparing fine dining experiences at home has given us a whole new hobby" is a far better way to express the same thought then beginning with YOU should do this or that. Rather than "just move, get out", could post: "If I really was as unhappy as you relate about circumstances here, I think I would begin to explore other locations and communities, no use spending your last years in unhappiness". So, just some examples of how people "could" write when they make posts, and be less abrasive, insulting, and self-righteous.... IMHO, which may be useless !
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one of the best posts I have ever read on TOTV. Thanks
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