[graciegirl]

And trap children in poverty. I am very much interested in this subject.


Single Parents Hinder Social Mobility, Harvard Study Claims

[buggyone]

I do not doubt this study - and it does not say all children of single parents are doomed to a life of poverty.

I can think of one prime example of a child of a single parent who did pretty good for himself - none other than the President of the USA!

[bestmickey]

There are exceptions to every study. My mother was widowed, with 8 children ranging in age from 1 yr. (me) to 17 yrs. We all became successful in our lives. Not rich, but useful members of society with decent (or excellent) jobs. We were NEVER on welfare. The family worked together to support each other. I thank God for my mother and supportive older siblings. By the way, mom only had a 7th grade education, having quit school to care for her ill father.

If one ("uneducated") woman with 8 children can do it ... anyone can ... but only IF willing.

[Madelaine Amee]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

And trap children in poverty. I am very much interested in this subject.


Single Parents Hinder Social Mobility, Harvard Study Claims

This is a very broad statement Gracie. It's probably very correct in the low income bracket, but I worked with, and knew, women who were professional women and had a child without a husband by choice. If the woman is educated there is no way the child will not be educated and achieve, but if the woman is born into poverty herself and starts to have children when she is just a child I agree, that is a downward spiral into despair and a continuation of single parenting and poverty.

[DianeM]

Not all children are doomed to poverty with a single parent. My father was an alcoholic low life who, thankfully, left when I was 3 even though my mother did not divorce him for years because of the stupid divorcee stigma of that era. My mother was a strong professional woman who got a good job and supported us. She paid for my college education, bought a house, travelled and went on to build a damn good life for us. I now live in TV and certainly do not live in poverty.

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by DianeM

Not all children are doomed to poverty with a single parent. My father was an alcoholic low life who, thankfully, left when I was 3 even though my mother did not divorce him for years because of the stupid divorcee stigma of that era. My mother was a strong professional woman who got a good job and supported us. She paid for my college education, bought a house, travelled and went on to build a damn good life for us. I now live in TV and certainly do not live in poverty.

I am intrigued with this subject too, because it is personal to me as well. My mother died eight days after my birth. I live here too. But .............. there are many children in poverty with one parent. What makes the difference?

[Madelaine Amee]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

I am intrigued with this subject too, because it is personal to me as well. My mother died eight days after my birth. I live here too. But .............. there are many children in poverty with one parent. What makes the difference?

I believe the Mother, or Mother figure (i.e. grandmother) makes a huge difference in how a child is brought up and how a child achieves. Although, I am sure there are many men who bring up their children alone and make sure they achieve all they can in life.

Difficult subject and every parent is different.

[DianeM]

Yes this is a perfectly proper topic for conversation. There is nothing wrong with the truth.

[OBXNana]

It's a fascinating study. It's also interesting to see those posting on this forum have overcome the statistics of the study. Kudos to the family members that made a difference in those young peoples lives. The sacrifice, determination, and love was tremendous. I wonder if those that were part of the study, reared by a single parent, and didn't overcome poverty, would be participating on this forum?

I think it takes a village to rear a child, regardless of the number of parents in the household or socioeconomic status. Possibly, the village doesn't exist as much in the households that experience poverty.

For those that have achieved tremendous success and posted here, kudos to you too!

[Bonnevie]

Gracie, I believe what makes the difference is a parent with a work ethic and who values education. I came from a two parent household and was told "women don't need to go to college". Luckily, I didn't listen to that and because I did well in school many of my friends were from families that felt their female child would of course go to college. I was a single parent from when my son was less than 2. He's now a senior in college. Ask him, and he will tell you that the value of an education, working hard, and saving were things drummed into him from day one. If you are unfortunate to be born into a situation where all you are exposed to is the acceptance of government handouts, where is the guidance to do anything else?

[Madelaine Amee]

Originally Posted by Bonnevie

If you are unfortunate to be born into a situation where all you are exposed to is the acceptance of government handouts, where is the guidance to do anything else?

I think everyone needs a mentor. Very few people get very far without having someone looking out for their best interests. I don't know what modern companies are like, I have been out of the work force for sometime, but I know that during my professional life you needed someone to be there for you, to recognize your achievements and to see your potential in order to achieve.

I believe the same could and does apply to the unfortunate who are born into a welfare situation. If you have a teacher, a neighbor, a grandparent, an extended family to guide and help you along, I think you can achieve. It is much more difficult without a loving and caring parent, but it can be and has been done.

I remember seeing a program on TV about a school in Harlem (?) where the Head and his teachers reached out to the children and gave them the confidence and education to have a good future. We all need someone!