Banister of Life

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  #1  
Old 06-06-2008, 09:01 PM
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Muncle Muncle is offline
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Default Banister of Life

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, remember:

1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called ....... 'Ministers Do More Than Lay People.'

2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.

3. The difference between the Pope and your boss, the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.

4. My mind works like lightning, One brilliant flash and it is gone.

5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.

6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.

7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.

8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

9. My next house will have no kitchen - just vending machines and a large trash can.

10. A blonde said, 'I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid.'

11. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment...for enjoying sex.

12. As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.
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Old 06-06-2008, 09:42 PM
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samhass samhass is offline
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Default Re: Banister of Life

Hey Muncle, I'm trying to figure out what you are trying to convey with that avatar.
Is that a subliminal advertisement?
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Old 06-06-2008, 09:53 PM
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Default Re: Banister of Life

Muncle I can relate to #8
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Old 06-06-2008, 10:40 PM
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Muncle Muncle is offline
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Default Re: Banister of Life

Quote:
Originally Posted by samhass
Hey Muncle, I'm trying to figure out what you are trying to convey with that avatar.
Is that a subliminal advertisement?
Well, as the masochist said to the sadist, "Hit me. Hit me. Hurt me. Hurt me."

And the sadist replied, "No."
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Old 06-07-2008, 03:19 AM
Sidney Lanier Sidney Lanier is offline
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Default Re: Banister of Life

"Turn signal fluid"?
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Old 06-09-2008, 12:09 AM
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Default Re: Banister of Life

#11 certainly hit home with me
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