[Yung Dum]

I see so many happy couples here in TV. I’m curious to know if these are first or second or more marriages. From what I’ve seen, most are first. I’m also curious to know where you’re from. I’m from N.Y. where marriages tend not to last a lifetime. What say you?

[Nucky]

Shouldn't this be in the political section! Great question but i'm out. Your funny though.

[Yung Dum]

Not trying to be funny or political. Just curious.

[Carl in Tampa]

In my experience, at least half of the couples who I socialize with are in their second (or later) marriages. This is sometimes because of divorce, but often it is because the first mates have died.

Additionally, you will find a lot of couples who live together but are not married. This is often due to complicated financial arrangements. The woman in the relationship may be receiving a benefit from the death of her husband that will cease if she remarries, causing a drastic reduction in household income. And if the new marriage should dissolve, she may find herself with little or no income.

For others, the combining of assets in marriage may make relationships difficult if both people have grown children with certain expectations of inheritance.

In the 1960s the city of St. Petersburg was reputedly the Florida city with the most retirees. There was some moral outrage when it was learned that a large number of the retired couples were not married. It was explained that the issue was the loss of Social Security benefits if the couples married.

St. Petersburg was dubbed a "Pooped Peyton Place."

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Carl in Tampa

In my experience, at least half of the couples who I socialize with are in their second (or later) marriages. This is sometimes because of divorce, but often it is because the first mates have died.

Additionally, you will find a lot of couples who live together but are not married. This is often due to complicated financial arrangements. The woman in the relationship may be receiving a benefit from the death of her husband that will cease if she remarries, causing a drastic reduction in household income. And if the new marriage should dissolve, she may find herself with little or no income.

For others, the combining of assets in marriage may make relationships difficult if both people have grown children with certain expectations of inheritance.

In the 1960s the city of St. Petersburg was reputedly the Florida city with the most retirees. There was some moral outrage when it was learned that a large number of the retired couples were not married. It was explained that the issue was the loss of Social Security benefits if the couples married.

St. Petersburg was dubbed a "Pooped Peyton Place."

Well said.

It is our first marriage, but it is more luck than sense on my part to have found him when I was not old enough yet to know what a prize he was and is. And before he knew what a ....load I am.

Many of our friends have been divorced a couple of times. And many are widowed. Many are living together as a couple to preserve their inheritances for their heirs.

Sometimes I think that the only folks who want to get married anymore are gay.

[Topspinmo]

First, 44 years, had ups and downs was was able to work through the downs, life or marriage is about give and take. If you truly love your spouse things will work out and most problems are not the end of the world. I find that things got complicated around the 7 year point. And around 15 years point. If marriage can survive these little bumps it it may just last life time. Usually needy people marriage don't work out because they are never satisfied. Some people can never be satisfied.

[VApeople]

We associate with a lot of couples. Some have been married for many years and others have different last names, so we do not know if they are not on their first marriage or if they are not even married.

In either case, it does not matter to us. All around us, we see people trying to enjoy the later years of their lives, and we enjoy being with them very much. That is all that matters.

[leftyf]

We are from Michigan and we will celebrate 50 years of marriage next month. First and only marriage.

[manaboutown]

In my experience a widowed individual frequently will not marry a new partner for financial reasons of one sort or another. As previously mentioned loss of widow/retirement benefits due to their spouse's death is one. In some divorce situations a nonworking spouse can receive lifetime spousal support which they lose if they remarry. Another is the estate issue; whose children will get what. This can be HUGE!

Among older folks what does it matter if a couple is married or not?

[plrbr1120]

Still married...once only....in 1973...from Illinois. Won't marry again if something happens to my wife as don't have enough life left in me to break the new person in to my ways. Probably don't have the patience either....LOL............

[aninjamom]

I and my spouse were both widowed, both had happy previous marriages, and like the commitment and yes, comfort of being married. Neither of us could see putting the time and energy into a relationship that is not "till death do us part". I gave up collecting widow's SS at 60 to marry him, we chose love over money. Fortunately we could afford it, and I'm still working. It was hard starting over, but very worth it! We are very happy.

[Taltarzac725]

There are a number of long term first marriages of New Yorkers in our neighborhood. A few second ones too where there is a New York Stater in the midst.

[Rango]

I've been happily married 3 times!

[Villager Joyce]

I'm paraphrasing a statement on how a couple married 63 years explained their success...Our generation fixes things that are broken. We don't throw it out.

[rubicon]

Originally Posted by Yung Dum

I see so many happy couples here in TV. I’m curious to know if these are first or second or more marriages. From what I’ve seen, most are first. I’m also curious to know where you’re from. I’m from N.Y. where marriages tend not to last a lifetime. What say you?

What a great topic.

I am from the old school. My wife is my first love. My greatest love and she will be my last love.

I am from a part of New York where we take our commitments seriously. Divorce was never a consideration and yes like all marriages we had our peaks and valleys.