[graciegirl]

Kate.

Your posts are always so insightful and kind........and funny.
I just love ya.

[JeanneBeannie]

Thank you Dianne, Linko and Kate for your wonderful words of wisdom. It meant so much to me to hear your kind words. I will make sure I read them everyday or ten times a day if I have to...to get thru this. I do know all of them mean well...but I must keep reminding myself "its my turn".

[katezbox]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

Kate.

Your posts are always so insightful and kind........and funny.
I just love ya.

Gracie,

Love ya back...

K

PS - the reason people you meet on line are surprised at your age when they meet you isn't because you look older than your avatar - it is because your posts are full of energy and sparkle.....

[njbchbum]

JeanneBeannie -
The bottom line is always that ya gotta do what ya gotta do for you...when mama's happy - everybody's happy...and when she's not - well, you know!

I am today looking at the strongest possibility that my 87 yr old mother is selling the last house that my sisters and I could call home and she is moving to live with my sister in N.C. [9 hr drive away - I don't fly]. I know and agree with her reasons for the move; and I understand her reason for selling the house.

Nonetheless, this will be the beginning of the widening of the gap between my sisters and I - it will become a gulf. We were raised to be independent [just in case we never married!] and we are [married and independent!]. We are all also over 50 - so we are set in our ways as well. Until the middle sister moved to N.C. this month to begin the retirement phase of her and her husband's life, we were within an hour drive of each other and could visit whenever the spirit moved one, could chat on the phone without it being an expensive call, we were there to support each other on the tough days, we had our holidays together, yada, yada, yada.

My other sister is still in N.J. but is facing an uncertain future because of her husband's very serious medical condition. We might find her transplanting to S.C near her daughter if/when she finds herself alone.

The house that is being sold is an oceanfront bungalow that my folks purchased just before my father passed - it was his best insurance policy for his family he said - and it was. Its rental history paid for college tuitions and wedding receptions! What times we spent there thru 40+ yrs!

That building represented a place that we could all go back to - sort of a place to have an annual reunion...a place where we could all be together again. But it does not appear that such is to be. The last link that could bring us together will be broken. Family will always be family - no matter what. But holidays will now be with friends, support will only be by phone and we'll only see each other in photos. This is gonna take a lot of getting used to!

Life goes on - but I never expected that it would go on without that little beach house and the family that lived there. The pastor says that this is sorta like a period to grieve and that the unhappiness I feel will pass - yeah, yeah, yeah - that's true. But in the mean time, the feelings can bring me to tears.

So, JeanneBeannie, give your friends some time to get used to "losing" you and enjoy the realizization of how much you mean to them. It may not make leaving them now any easier, but you will know that you did all that you could do - and no one should ever ask for more than that.

...am now ready for a pity party and feel the need to drown my sorrow in mint chocolate chip on toasted pound cake...

[Boomer]

Originally Posted by njbchbum

JeanneBeannie -
The bottom line is always that ya gotta do what ya gotta do for you...when mama's happy - everybody's happy...and when she's not - well, you know!

I am today looking at the strongest possibility that my 87 yr old mother is selling the last house that my sisters and I could call home and she is moving to live with my sister in N.C. [9 hr drive away - I don't fly]. I know and agree with her reasons for the move; and I understand her reason for selling the house.

Nonetheless, this will be the beginning of the widening of the gap between my sisters and I - it will become a gulf. We were raised to be independent [just in case we never married!] and we are [married and independent!]. We are all also over 50 - so we are set in our ways as well. Until the middle sister moved to N.C. this month to begin the retirement phase of her and her husband's life, we were within an hour drive of each other and could visit whenever the spirit moved one, could chat on the phone without it being an expensive call, we were there to support each other on the tough days, we had our holidays together, yada, yada, yada.

My other sister is still in N.J. but is facing an uncertain future because of her husband's very serious medical condition. We might find her transplanting to S.C near her daughter if/when she finds herself alone.

The house that is being sold is an oceanfront bungalow that my folks purchased just before my father passed - it was his best insurance policy for his family he said - and it was. Its rental history paid for college tuitions and wedding receptions! What times we spent there thru 40+ yrs!

That building represented a place that we could all go back to - sort of a place to have an annual reunion...a place where we could all be together again. But it does not appear that such is to be. The last link that could bring us together will be broken. Family will always be family - no matter what. But holidays will now be with friends, support will only be by phone and we'll only see each other in photos. This is gonna take a lot of getting used to!

Life goes on - but I never expected that it would go on without that little beach house and the family that lived there. The pastor says that this is sorta like a period to grieve and that the unhappiness I feel will pass - yeah, yeah, yeah - that's true. But in the mean time, the feelings can bring me to tears.

So, JeanneBeannie, give your friends some time to get used to "losing" you and enjoy the realizization of how much you mean to them. It may not make leaving them now any easier, but you will know that you did all that you could do - and no one should ever ask for more than that.

...am now ready for a pity party and feel the need to drown my sorrow in mint chocolate chip on toasted pound cake...

njbchbum, (I just realized what your screen name means. I cannot believe I did not break the code before.)

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that these are wonderful words that you put here for JeanneBeannie, and I know that your words will help others, too. Good practical woman words. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts so beautifully. This world of the internet sure is something sometimes. Thanks for reaching through cyberspace to help somebody. (And have an extra scoop of that mint chocolate chip for me.)

Boomer

[JeanneBeannie]

Can I join you njbchbum....mint chocolate chip is one of my favorites?? .
I feel bad whining about my woes, when truly you are going thru something much more difficult. I remember when my parents house sold and it was very sad. Thank you for all your thoughtfulness, and I hope that in some way this transition of selling the house on the beach will leave you with many happy memories with your family. My son wont fly either, so I am sure the distance with your Mother moving is going to be hard also.
And so very true...."when Mama's happy...everyone is happy"!
Thank you and good luck to you. I guess this is what they mean by the circle of life?

[JeanneBeannie]

Boomer.....I agree .

It is wonderful to have met such wonderful people thru cyberspace!

[annford]

How many times have your kids said they were going to run away from home? Well, we heard that a few times, so when they asked us why we were moving to Florida, we just said, "Dad & I just decided we would run away from home" They got over it and visit quite often and they have a ball. Now I just have to figure out how to get them to rent their own golf cart.

[memason]

I can appreciate your situation. We are still wannabes, but my job has taken me to Germany for a few years. Now that we're 4,000 miles from family [Kids and Grandkids], I believe they'll be happy with us anywhere within the borders of the US ..... :-))

[dizz42]

Originally Posted by annford

How many times have your kids said they were going to run away from home? Well, we heard that a few times, so when they asked us why we were moving to Florida, we just said, "Dad & I just decided we would run away from home".

This is a good one! When we visited and rented a home in TV in June, we came "this close" to putting in a bid on a house. We got cold feet but since we got home we have talked and talked about making the move. One of the factors in backing out was "what will our families say?" Well, when we told them about TV and they saw our pictures, every single one of them said, "Go for it"! In fact, my oldest sister said she wished she had moved years ago but now feels too old and set in her ways. While I still think she could do it, I see her point.

My husband and I are newly retired and feel now is the time to do this. Our official LSP will be in January and in the meantime, we are getting our house ready to sell. My thinking has always been "What's the worse that could happen?" Well, lets see...we move to TV and hate it? Then I guess we would just move back north. While it would be a pain to pack up and move again, no one's going to MAKE us stay if we don't want to.

[JeanneBeannie]

Thank you Annford...you are so right...excellent point!! His dream is Montana, so I am sure if he had the opportunity he would be gone in a flash!

Wow Memason...Germany?? Whewww now that is far!! It must be so hard to be away from your family. I bet they cant wait for you to return.

Dizz thank you....I remember reading your posts as you were leaving TV and going back home and dreaming of moving to TV. Another excellent point, I told my son I can always come back if it doesnt work. He is a worry wart (like me lol) and he worries I dont know anyone, I will be alone, the heat etc. etc. hehe. Actually everyone that I know has said that they are sure he will follow me to TV...that would be fantastic! If not TV at least someplace closer. My sister suggested TV to me, so she is absolutely thrilled for me, along with my close friends. But there are always a few in the bunch who like to put their two cents in .
The nay sayers think of Florida as hot, hurricanes, humid etc. Hey the three HHH"s . Very easy peasy (as Bare would say) if its hot and humid...I stay inside with the AC on, if there is a hurricane, I will hide under my bed hehe. .
Everyone has been so thoughtful and helpful, I appreciate it so much!!

[jojo]

JeanneBeannie, Come on down. Look how many friends you have here already.

[JeanneBeannie]

Originally Posted by jojo

JeanneBeannie, Come on down. Look how many friends you have here already.

Thank you JoJo, that is so sweet of you to say. I am really looking forward to meeting you very soon. My new dilemma is packing, moving by 9/30. I thought I could rent a cheap apt. here while I make this all work, but there isnt one available. So now wondering...if I should just pack up and move on down and rent there till I find something. Wow...sorry...can you tell I am confused lol?? I am sure there are plenty of folks like me going thru the same thing, soon this will be over and I will be sitting at the pool relaxing with all of you!!!

[dillywho]

Just remind those naysayers when they tell you about the heat, humidity, hurricanes, etc. that you don't have to shovel heat, humidity, hurricanes while freezing your arse in the process.

[Indy-Guy]

My cousin thought I was crazy when I told her I had purchased a place in The Villages FL.

When I would see her on visits back to Indiana she would ask me if I miss Indiana and I would just laugh and shake my head no and say not at all. I lived in the Indianapolis area all of my life and never thought I would leave till I saw The Villages.

She and her husband visited this year and after a two hour tour of The Villages we sat down to lunch at Cane Garden. She said well when I asked you if you missed Indiana I see how foolish a question that was.

As I told her when you try to describe this place to someone it is like describing Disney World to someone who has only been to a County fair.