[Rozzie]

Hey friends,

We have 2 weeks until my mom becomes a full time Villager. She is getting nervous, anxious, scared, excited, etc about what to expect. If the move doesn't drive us both batty, I am banking on she is going to do just fine down there. Just wondering if anyone can share some advice for a new Villager. Anything related to being a new resident, how to cut costs, how to make friends, what things she must have (surge protectors?), what things can she do without for now, anything you can offer based on your experiences. Would you do anything different, if you had the chance to start over in TV?

She is a widower, and I guess that is where some of her anxiety comes from. I will be down for a few days with the move, but sadly can't stay a long time because of my job. I know she will be fine, but any advice you can give will be much appreciated.

Thanks in advance.

[Lil Dancer]

I would suggest she start getting involved socially. Generally, each neighborhood or village has regular get togethers, pass a dish events, ladies luncheons, etc. Her neighborhood might even have a website where activites are listed. Oftentimes they are advertised on posters at the neighborhood post office.

She can get a printout from the rec center of monthly activites as well, such as card games, mah jong, different clubs, reading groups, art, etc. These are all ways to stay busy and also meet people. With the elections coming up she may be interested in joining the monthly meetings of republicans or democrats. For example, we play euchre (a card game) twice a week, and there are quite a few singles that play.

When she tries out the different activities, she will find some she likes, some where the people are friendly, others where they may not be as nice to newcomers but its trial and error, and in time she will find her niche.

Neighbors can be a good resource as far as things she might want to do to the house. Is she buying a new home or a pre-owned? If it was me, I'd probably wait 6 months or so to get "the lay of the land" so to speak. I wouldn't rush into any major purchases. if she likes to garden, there are landscaping clubs that have speakers and give advice.

I like to garden and one of the things I did first was to plant shrubs and trees, so they'd get a headstart on growing. We've been in our house about 2 years now, but our landscpaping looks terrific, and it was low cost because I did it myself, and started with small stuff I bought locally, at Lowes, Home Depot, etc. Some people spend a fortune on landscaping, having someone come in and plant bigger stuff so they have an "immediate impact" type of look, but you get just as good a job if you start small. Things grow pretty quickly in tropical conditions. I did my landscaping the first year we were there, then did my interior design the next year. Kind of backwards, I know, but it worked for us.

If she plays golf, there are lady's days at the various golf courses, where the women sign up ahead of time and are grouped together. Another nice way of meeting people. They do this on the championship courses, and also on the 9 hole executive courses.

Good luck to her, and if you have any questions, please feel free to ask! P.S. We've lived in The villages for at least 4 years, and we still only have individual surge protectors on our televisions and computers.

[Rozzie]

Thank you Lil Dancer for your informative post. You brought up a lot of good points. Especially the landscaping. She has it in her mind that the first thing she must do when she steps off the moving van is start enhancing landscaping. I say just let things be for a year and get a feel for the yard, I liked your suggestion of self planting some slow growing stuff.

She doesn't play cards (I hope she learns!) nor Golf (she wants to learn LOL!), but there are some clubs/activities she and I went over that she may be interested in. One was the political club, and then I think there was a World Affairs one I think we saw. I am sure she will meet friends, I just hope she doesn't get discouraged if she runs across one or two groups that are not new villager friendly.

Does anyone else have anything they can share?

[Avista]

If she is a church going person, this is a great place to get acquainted. We've been here 18 months and most of the people with whom we've become friends, we met in church or at our monthly neighborhood get togethers. Many of our churches are golf cart accessible.

[smalldog]

Small Dog Sez due to the size of this place you may have to work at finding social contacts ........ golf is a excellent way to meet folks as well as good exercise for your body and mind, it has a whole social structure built into it church and clubs also help but they don't come to you, you must go to them :

[graciegirl]

Rozzie. Tell her to avoid the crazy lady on Havana Trail.(But she seems to like me, LOL)

Your mother just left here and we had a small coffee get together with five other newbies. I think she has found a cohort or two among them, because we are leaving tomorrow and I feel bad because she is so NEW.

Happy Birthday Robyn! Hugs and kisses. It was so wonderful meeting both of you.

[Rozzie]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

Rozzie. Tell her to avoid the crazy lady on Havana Trail.(But she seems to like me, LOL)

Your mother just left here and we had a small coffee get together with five other newbies. I think she has found a cohort or two among them, because we are leaving tomorrow and I feel bad because she is so NEW.

Happy Birthday Robyn! Hugs and kisses. It was so wonderful meeting both of you.

Thanks Grace, you have been such a wonderful blessing to us both. I just spoke with her and she really enjoyed herself, she is so glad she went. Thanks again for putting together the coffee. BTW, I love the crazy lady on Havana Trail! ;D

[renielarson]

I love the crazy lady on Havana Trail, too...but due to me getting pinkeye while on my weekend jaunt to Kansas, I couldn't meet up with you all today....I was still contagious and didn't want to put any of you at risk....SIGH!

I'm looking forward to the time we can get together...hopefully Christmas vacation since that is when I'll be back again.

Your mother will do just fine, Rozzie. This is a wonderful place to live and she will meet new friends as long as she gets out and participates in activities.

[barb1191]

Hi Rozzie:

I bought here totally on my own in the year 2002. My biggest fear was learning to drive around TV. One evening I met my cousin in SS and we had dinner and he followed me to Polo Ridge to see my place. He lives in Ocala. Well, on the way, I got lost and ended up in the Lopez Legacy area that, at that time was pitch dark; no streets other than the main road (Buena Vists) HAD NO STRUCTURES BUILT!! No homes nor even Mulberry or Lopez CC. I was petrified as it was about 9 pm and hadn't a clue where I was.

I backtracked to the Savannah/Glenview rotary where I drove to a manned gate and said, "I'm lost, please tell me where my house is located from here? I wasn't too far off; what confused me was what exit to take on the rotary. Well, we finally arrived "home."

The next day, my next-door neighbor stopped by to ask if she could help and we became good friends. To this day, (btw, I married two years later having met Mr Wonderful here in TV) since we're snowbirds, she always looks out for our property, bless her. She was my salvation in learning the roads before I met Bill. Mind you, this was the year 2002 when none of Southern Trace mall existed. Rte 466 was all large farms with nothing started at LSL; even Rte 466 was a narrow two-lane road. The only business was the Circle K gas station. Peggy showed me where to food shop at SS and where the mall was in Ocala.

The only place I dared go alone was to Walmart on Rte 441; long before Walmart was built on Rte 466.

Well, guess I got carried away with my story. I highly recommend that you accept all of your neighbors' social activities and you too will meet wonderful people...most in the same boat as you who have left their deep roots and loved ones and are bonding with the wonderful people you meet at TV.

A word of caution.... In any service you hire, DO NOT EVER prepay! And....a visit to Crispers to meet the TOTV members who are so very helpful to the "newbies."

Good luck and just remember....you are NEVER alone in TV......barb

PS: I joined a bocce group and met some lasting friends there. Also joined the computer club where there's many members from beginners to real pro's willing to help. One never feels inferior if one is just learning. They love to help. Oh yes, also joined beginner line dancing and met lots of beginners and pros there. The pros attend to help the beginners. Such fun there and meet real nice people who don't know their left from their right or out of step and, who cares as long as you're having fun.

[rshoffer]

Go into activities and social contacts at a pace you find comfortable. Some seem in a frenzy to get involved in everything immediately which can be overwhelming. You will meet your neighbors just bobbing around in your village pool. It will come together in due time. relax and enjoy things first.

[Barefoot]

Originally Posted by rshoffer

Go into activities and social contacts at a pace you find comfortable. Some seem in a frenzy to get involved in everything immediately which can be overwhelming. You will meet your neighbors just bobbing around in your village pool. It will come together in due time. relax and enjoy things first.

That is good advice. I was one of the peeps who got in a frenzy and had to take a sabbatical from having fun to rest. Rshoffer is right, it will come together in due time, no hurry, no worries.

[JohnN]

My advice would be at a higher level.

Change (especially for us "mature" folks) causes stress - even good change.
It's always difficult for most folks to adapt to new situations, neighbors, places to live.

When my kids were young, we moved and they were unhappy, I asked them to give it one year - a change of seasons, and just let it play out. They agreed, and after one year, all was great.

Just give it a change of seasons, and I'm sure it'll take a lot less than that. Best wishes.