[ithos]

Originally Posted by lmrk32

I have visited the Villages and have been considering retiring there so I have been following the posts closely now just to get a feel for mind set of this community.

I must ask....why is everyone so nasty? Why do people feel so entitled to attack others who dare to have a different opinion? It is fine to disagree, as we all have a right to state our opinion, but why must it be in such a vicious way?

It is such a turn-off.
I am a born and bred NYer so I am fluent in sarcasm but this degree of nastiness is offensive even to me.

I am interested in the new apartments because I am a woman alone and do not want the trouble of keeping up a house.
I am not white trash. I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school.
I have a healthy income and retirement fund.
So, I might actually be an asset to your community.....I will not bring you down just because I live in an apartment.
But if I am going to be made to feel like crap simply because I chose to live in an apartment....I really don't need that! I will be retired. I want to enjoy!!!! Not listen to bitterness and prejudice.

So, if any of you now want to make a snarky remark because "I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school" or because "I am a woman alone" or because of anything else you would like to pick out of this post and ridicule, just save it.....I am not interested in such ignorance.

You are in a playland. Go out and enjoy instead of sitting home and ruminating over trivial things and then spewing venom

I don't think you are going to get a very accurate perspective based on the tiny percent of people who post on this forum.

The new apartments in Brownwood would be a great place to live and very reasonable considering of all the shops, restaurants and entertainment with in walking distance. The Villages is a very friendly place where most everyone minds their own business. If you hit the town squares once things fully reopen then you will get a much better idea what most people are like.

[yankygrl]

Originally Posted by NYNative55

I have family members who live in TV, & as I near retirement it’s an affordable option for me as well.

As a single gay man, I wonder whether it’s a good fit for me. I know there’s an active, officially sanctioned gay Resident Lifestyle group, but I’d still be in the minority in TV. I’ve visited a number of times, but it’s not easy to gauge what it would be like for me to live there.

I’m fit & active & know there are any number of activities that might appeal to someone who’s friendly, but an introvert, who just wants to live a peaceful, quiet life. I’ve been very fortunate throughout my life, & not experienced overt or discriminatory homophobia or a fear of living my life openly. Now is not the time for that to change.

I was reluctant to post this & generally avoid posting to forums or any form of social media, since threads can quickly turn negative. However, this is such an important decision, I feel compelled to try. I look forward to, & appreciate your honest, thoughtful comments. Thank you.

While I don’t push the lifestyles program because they try to sell you things ur may not be interested in, it is a good way to see what it’s all about. Other option is to rent for a few weeks or month prior to making up ur mind. As others have said, it’s a bit different right now due to COVID but for the most part things are opening up so you can enjoy the lifestyle. I’ve lived here10 years and enjoy everything that I wish too.

[Marshaw]

One thing is for sure. No need to be concerned regarding the temperament of the responses. I find them all heart felt. You have been here several times you said. You have family that lives here yet you seem to ha reservations. they are 130,000 people who presently live here. The sell 300 houses a month. So it will to grow and with that comes more diversity. Not being gay I have no info for you to ease your concerns. I never hear anything about his only lesbians. The villages have a very large presence her Republican I'm sure is by large the predominant political party. Those two demographic group that are 56 and over I wouldn't think that would represent the best potential groups for you to live in harmony. No judgement I suggest renting for a year. If TV comes up as a bad place for you, you will have time maybe to find your happy place.

[jimjamuser]

Originally Posted by Byte1

I guess there are some folks that will feel some "intolerance" if no one agrees with them on their views. There are some folks that will not be happy regardless of where they reside.

I guess.

[NYNative55]

Thank you all for your thoughts & suggestions. I find it encouraging & very helpful. If circumstances permit, I’d like to make a lengthier visit in the fall & get a better feel for the community. My family has been supportive & have encouraged me to consider TV. Truthfully, after my visit last December, I began looking at properties remotely with their help. It quickly became apparent though, that relying on them to go to open houses, make appointments to view listings & reporting back to me, was putting an unnecessary burden on them (& stress on me). Added to that was my concern about it being the right place for me. All in all, it wasn’t the most ideal situation, so I put a purchase on hold. Given what’s happened this year it was probably the right decision.

My original plan was to work a few more years, and I didn’t feel the need to rush into anything. I’m working remotely & very fortunate to still be employed, however these last 6 months have made me reevaluate my original timeline. There’s so much to consider & plan for, that it’s good to know there’s a supportive community & it’s one less thing to worry about. Thank you again.

[jimjamuser]

Originally Posted by lmrk32

I have visited the Villages and have been considering retiring there so I have been following the posts closely now just to get a feel for mind set of this community.

I must ask....why is everyone so nasty? Why do people feel so entitled to attack others who dare to have a different opinion? It is fine to disagree, as we all have a right to state our opinion, but why must it be in such a vicious way?

It is such a turn-off.
I am a born and bred NYer so I am fluent in sarcasm but this degree of nastiness is offensive even to me.

I am interested in the new apartments because I am a woman alone and do not want the trouble of keeping up a house.
I am not white trash. I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school.
I have a healthy income and retirement fund.
So, I might actually be an asset to your community.....I will not bring you down just because I live in an apartment.
But if I am going to be made to feel like crap simply because I chose to live in an apartment....I really don't need that! I will be retired. I want to enjoy!!!! Not listen to bitterness and prejudice.

So, if any of you now want to make a snarky remark because "I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school" or because "I am a woman alone" or because of anything else you would like to pick out of this post and ridicule, just save it.....I am not interested in such ignorance.

You are in a playland. Go out and enjoy instead of sitting home and ruminating over trivial things and then spewing venom

Not snarky remarks just because someone lives, or wants to, live in an apartment. Best advice is to rent for 6 months and then buy. This was a playground BCV (before CoronaVirus). Now ACV it has changed just like the larger world and the US in particular has changed. It is now a shadow of its former self. Sounds like you would be an asset to the community.

[FromNY]

You may have more issues being from New York then being gay. Renting is always a good idea. Gives you time to spend your money wisely. Tampa and Orlando and Ocala have a verity of Gay groups. If you are looking for nightlife activities. If you are looking to live life and enjoy The Villages definitely has much to offer. Best wishes as you make life transitions.

[Ladygolfer93]

Well, I'm not single and not gay, so maybe my opinion is not as broad based as you would like. But, IMO it was a non issue for many many years. I hope it still is but, the whole atmosphere of kind, accepting, people from all walks of life (original slogan was: where any man can retire like a king) has changed, as things do of course. People have become much more judgmental, more like the stereo typical "retirement" community with too many people with nothing to do but tend to the business of others. On the other hand, that does not mean that everything has changed for the worst, chances are you would not experience any kind of, shall we call it "discrimination" ? Not that it could not happen, but then,
as long as you know how a few people are no matter where you go. We have people here who are very offended by Christians and do not want them to have any visible symbols of their belief, there are those offended by small animal statures in gardens ! But all in all, I think while possible that you could be hurt or offended at something, such as lack of an invitation or a seeming slight of some kind, I still think it would be rare and that most people would be much more concerned about you as a good and kind neighbor and a decent caring human being. It always goes both ways of course, again only in my observation over quite a few years now, but I have never heard or observed that the gay community here is exclusive or unwelcoming to non gay people either. If it is at all possible (I'd tell the very same thing to anyone, gay or straight) rent for at least 6 months and one year if at all financially possible. It is the only way you can personally get a feel for the whole community and detect (if any ?) unkind or unaccepting attitudes. The sister of one of my closest college friends moved here with her partner and they have a large circle of couples both gay and straight that all play golf, bocci, cruise, kayak and have a fair number of neighborhood parties with all the time. Rent, that's my best suggestion, get acquainted with people, join some groups, make sure, don't want to spend retirement in an unfriendly place or with narrow minded people !

[Ladygolfer93]

Originally Posted by lmrk32

I have visited the Villages and have been considering retiring there so I have been following the posts closely now just to get a feel for mind set of this community.

I must ask....why is everyone so nasty? Why do people feel so entitled to attack others who dare to have a different opinion? It is fine to disagree, as we all have a right to state our opinion, but why must it be in such a vicious way?

It is such a turn-off.
I am a born and bred NYer so I am fluent in sarcasm but this degree of nastiness is offensive even to me.

I am interested in the new apartments because I am a woman alone and do not want the trouble of keeping up a house.
I am not white trash. I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school.
I have a healthy income and retirement fund.
So, I might actually be an asset to your community.....I will not bring you down just because I live in an apartment.
But if I am going to be made to feel like crap simply because I chose to live in an apartment....I really don't need that! I will be retired. I want to enjoy!!!! Not listen to bitterness and prejudice.

So, if any of you now want to make a snarky remark because "I have an advanced degree from an Ivy League school" or because "I am a woman alone" or because of anything else you would like to pick out of this post and ridicule, just save it.....I am not interested in such ignorance.

You are in a playland. Go out and enjoy instead of sitting home and ruminating over trivial things and then spewing venom

I understand and share your observations.... somewhat. But, I have been here for many years (was still working at the time and since I was considering building a house here, I rented and that convinced me to buy at lot and build. Things have changed over the years, but, be aware.... a LOT of the people who post here use some shocking terms and sometimes I think that it is a "hobby" for them. Of course we have lost a great deal of that "little home town feeling", and the virus, together with the most controversial political atmosphere I have EVER experienced in all these years, have done a lot to destroy the atmosphere we enjoyed for so many years. Also, having a single family actually "owning" a town, a community, is not always a good thing. There is no mayor, no councilmen, and as the population becomes more diverse, you are going to see things on this that you would never had seen years ago. When TOTV began, it was a way we all HELPED each other by sharing really valuable info. But, again, things change, the website itself changed, became very commercial, you'll begin to recognize those who enjoy name calling, or just stirring controversy, as well as those genuinely concerned about the kinds of things that are indeed causing a lack of life quality but producing a much greater profit. The Virus has also made a huge difference. While some in my neighborhood have really pulled together to support each other, check on each other, encourage each other, others have shockingly seemed to be self appointed "virus police" , or trolls as some call them. Also the attitudes of some, certainly not all, have become either very fearful for their personal safety and health, or, very suspicious of others. It's not a pretty picture, but, know that while there are some VERY nasty things on here, the people who dominate that are definitely in the minority... and pretty much tend to be the ones whose whole life is posting on TOTV... don't read too much into it, but yes, it does exist to a much greater degree than it once did.

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by NYNative55

I have family members who live in TV, & as I near retirement it’s an affordable option for me as well.

As a single gay man, I wonder whether it’s a good fit for me. I know there’s an active, officially sanctioned gay Resident Lifestyle group, but I’d still be in the minority in TV. I’ve visited a number of times, but it’s not easy to gauge what it would be like for me to live there.

I’m fit & active & know there are any number of activities that might appeal to someone who’s friendly, but an introvert, who just wants to live a peaceful, quiet life. I’ve been very fortunate throughout my life, & not experienced overt or discriminatory homophobia or a fear of living my life openly. Now is not the time for that to change.

I was reluctant to post this & generally avoid posting to forums or any form of social media, since threads can quickly turn negative. However, this is such an important decision, I feel compelled to try. I look forward to, & appreciate your honest, thoughtful comments. Thank you.

If you are 55 that makes you generally younger than most people here. As for your being gay, I think the same problems will face you as you would face anywhere. There is a lot of "geographic" difference in attitude here in TV. Many find people from the Upper Midwest almost unbearably nice. (I happen to like that) Some find people from NYC very outspoken. Some find Southerners artificially sweet. We personally have one male gay friend and 16 gay women friends who live here. All of the gay people I know personally vote differently from the majority of people in The Villages. I have always wondered WHY?? I have had two women friends who are gay move to Tampa.

I love it here. I think anyone would but I am me. We all are who we are. I hope you find a wonderful rest of your life wherever you decide to live.

(There are a lot of very conservative Christians who live here who believe homosexuality is a choice and is sinful) BUT the ones I know are kind and polite if that helps.

[GreySkies]

In my opinion, your sexual preference or the opinions of others about your sexual preference should not be a major factor in deciding where you want to live. If your feel comfortable with living in TV then you make it happen, as simple as that. However, I do agree with those who say RENT before you buy, I am doing that myself, I am on month 2 of a year lease in TV.

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Hospes444

I believe you will love it here!! So many friendly and
non judgemental folks. Friends come easy, and of course there are so many activities...even with COVID
You might find some nice furnished long term rentals on Villagershomes4rent.com
Makes it easy to find a home in the location you want
That's how we found our home.
Hope your decision will be an easy one, once you arrive here

I just read your newest post. It is interesting that you tout long term rentals on one hand........and worry about them on the other.

You seem like a lovely person.

[VApeople]

Originally Posted by NYNative55

As a single gay man, I wonder whether it’s a good fit for me.

A gay woman moved into our cul-de-sac three houses away from us. She and her companion get along very well with her neighbors. They got invited to parties before the virus hit. We invited them to our driveway party last year and they stayed until the end and even helped us clean up, which is usually a sign that they felt welcome.

To be honest, most of are too 'experienced' to be judgmental. We just want to enjoy our life.

Originally Posted by NYNative55

I have family members who live in TV, & as I near retirement it’s an affordable option for me as well.

As a single gay man, I wonder whether it’s a good fit for me. I know there’s an active, officially sanctioned gay Resident Lifestyle group, but I’d still be in the minority in TV. I’ve visited a number of times, but it’s not easy to gauge what it would be like for me to live there.

I’m fit & active & know there are any number of activities that might appeal to someone who’s friendly, but an introvert, who just wants to live a peaceful, quiet life. I’ve been very fortunate throughout my life, & not experienced overt or discriminatory homophobia or a fear of living my life openly. Now is not the time for that to change.

I was reluctant to post this & generally avoid posting to forums or any form of social media, since threads can quickly turn negative. However, this is such an important decision, I feel compelled to try. I look forward to, & appreciate your honest, thoughtful comments. Thank you.

Honestly there is not much social life here for a gay man. Our friends went to St Pete and bought a condo in an area with a very active gay community.

[Stu from NYC]

I would suggest you rent for several months to give you time to experience the community and give you a better idea of where you might want to live.

We are new ourselves and like it here but do find people friendly for the most part. I walk a lot and vast majority will say good morning or hello but some will stare straight ahead and ignore any one else.

As they say takes all kinds