[duffysmom]

In raising children, is corporeal punishment ever warranted?

[redwitch]

Sometimes, yes. Given a choice between having a toddler constantly reaching for a hot stove and a quick swat on the rear to convince him not to, I'll got for the quick swat. There is no excuse for using corporeal punishment in anger. If you're going to use, use it fairly and to truly get a message across.

I was spanked by my father three times in my life. I remember each one vividly. He got his message across. Of course, normally, all he ever had to do was look at me and I'd quit misbehaving. My brother you could have beaten within an inch of his life and all he would have learned was that you were bigger and could hurt more. For him, my father used a lot of time outs and groundings. They had their effect.

I don't believe a spanking is the best answer, but I can understand a parent using it. I'd much rather see a child spanked than see it verbally beaten down or tortured in some other manner in the guise of a consequence/punishment.

[duffysmom]

Redwitch, thanks for the correct spelling.

[redwitch]

rofl .. your spelling is the correct one (corporeal speaks to the body -- as in a ghost has no corporeal body). it was a typo by me (hard to type right now, sorry).

[jblum8156]

I remember smacking my 2-year-old daughter on her fanny because she had run out into the (thankfully quiet) street not once but twice. I think that was the only time I ever hit her. Sometimes yelling just doesn't get the message across.

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by jblum8156

I remember smacking my 2-year-old daughter on her fanny because she had run out into the (thankfully quiet) street not once but twice. I think that was the only time I ever hit her. Sometimes yelling just doesn't get the message across.

I agree and I think that it is only when they are very little and what they are doing could kill them literally.

You can only modify the environment to a certain extent.

Mine was for the same issue. Our daughters running into the street.

I yelled a lot on other serious stuff.

Thankfully they turned out fine and still love me.

[bkcunningham1]

I raised a brother and a sister who came into my life as toddlers. I hadn't had a very good life before God sent them to me. One afternoon my neighbor came to walk his two little girls home, just across the street, after a sleepover at my house playing with my children.

My daughter, who was about four at the time, pleaded with me to let her walk the girls home with their daddy. I told her no and we kissed and hugged everyone goodbye. I proceeded to cook dinner.

After about two minutes, I had a funny feeling and walked to the porch to see my sweet little girl with her pink bicycle doing circles in the middle of the street. It was a cul-de-sac and not much traffic, but we had a line drawn with black spray paint across the end of our driveway as a boundary for the kids NOT TO CROSS. She and her brother (and any children at my house) were told the consequences for crossing the line.

When I went on the porch and yelled for her, she came riding back and I knew by the look on her face she knew she was in trouble. I took her by the little hand and asked what she was doing. I asked if she crossed the line in the driveway. She said yes and she told me what was going to happen.

We both cried. I busted her a@@ with my hand while she laid across my lap. I cried some more, hugged her and told her she had to mind or something worse than a spanking could have happened. I never had a reason to paddle her bottom after that one time.

Now her brother...oh my goodness. The first time I paddled his bottom, he looked at me with tears welled up in his eyes, not a tear fell mind you, just puddled lakes in his hazel eyes. He said, "You can't hurt me. My mommy used to try to hurt me and she couldn't hurt me."

I told him I didn't want to hurt him, I loved him and I just wanted him to mind what I was telling him to do. It broke my heart and I soon learned that the worst punishment I could give him was when I cried. It melted his heart and he would obey anything I asked of him...well for a little while. Boys will be boys.

By the Grace of God, and a few more swats on my son's bottom, they are both beautiful, productive and very happy members of society.

[K9-Lovers]

Yes, I agree that one quick swat on the bottom with your hand serves well especially in cases where you catch a toddler in the act of something they know is wrong. The surprise, noise, as well as the physical touch can work wonders. For toddlers only.

I don't agree with spanking an older child, having lived that experience. They spanked in school, too, but I was a model student and escaped that punishment. I think a conversation and some other form of discipline works better. It seems to me that some children who were spanked when they were older have a tendency to solve problems using physical force rather than other methods when they reach adulthood. A conversation and more thoughtful ways of discipling can teach children how to think more creatively about problem-solving when they become adults, instead of having an immediate physical reaction.

Having no children/grandchildren of my own, I am speaking from my personal experience and memories from my own and my siblings childhoods.