[KathieI]

Originally Posted by Talk Host

Amity and I have taken a motorcycle trip and I am currently sitting on the front porch of the Gibson Inn in Apalachicola, Florida. I had hoped to be away from everything for a few days, but it appears that a crisis has arisen here on Talk of The Villages and here I am, back at it.

The three administrators of this board have tried very hard at great personal expense and time to provide a forum where Village residents can enjoy themselves, make new friends and support each other (example the TOTV cruise). We provide this as a "free" service to our fellow members. There is not one member who invests one penny toward the operation of this forum. It is done gratefully by your three administrators. Likewise, not one member spends one second on the administration of this forum, nor do they answer any of the hundreds of emails and complaints that we receive every month about everything associated with this board.

We have a responsibility to all of the members to do our best to provide a place where everybody can visit without fear of being ridiculed or taken to task for their sincere efforts. When a new forum is put up, it is done so by the administrators, and it is we who decide how it will be used and how the rules will be enforced. No forum belongs to any one individual.

Every hour of every day, we each receive emails and personal messages from members who have issues about everything you can imagine. The complaints range from "people are picking on me" to "the in crowd is taking over the board," to "why don't you remove his post" to "my ad is too small" to "this board isn't what I want it to be" to "this is the most confusing forum I have ever seen" to "did you see what she said about me," and so on and so on and so on. We accept the responsibility because we knew is came with the territory.

There is no Talk of The Villages Court. But there are three administrators who are human and want the best forum for all the members. From time to time there is an emotionally charged thread that gets out of hand and it will only lead to further problems. So, a decision may be made to derail the runaway locomotive. That is not censorship.

Now, if anybody has a better idea of how we can manage our board and make everybody happy all of the time, your three administrators would like to hear the plan. This plan has got to include a system by which we can make a decision about hurtful posts that pleases every living soul.

What do you all want this board to be like? A place where everybody can have a good time, or one where there is no order and nobody looking after things. The second option is the easiest for us.

I don't mind telling you that the three of us feel very bad that our efforts to make Talk of The Village a nice place has taken a turn because a few people feel that their right to say whatever they want has been disallowed.

I have know Tony Zona for 42 years. He and his wife are godparents to my daughter. You will not ever find a person who is more eager to do the right thing every time. He does not act out of haste or malicious intent. He is thorough in his thinking and makes decisions based on what is best for a proper outcome.

We don't want anybody to leave this forum, nor will be intimidated into changing our system by threats that an individual or a group will leave. Please use this forum for what it is intended....fun for all.

As the director of a staff of young engineers for the past 25 -30 years, I can appreciate the stream of complaints and suggestions and persnickety remarks made day in and day out, but as I always said to them, I'll listen to your comments very intently but remember, I AM THE DIRECTOR, and I make the final decision like it or not. So although the suggestion of assisting the admins of their tough task is nice, unfortunately I think that the decision making cannot be dispersed over a few people. And.... IMO I believe Jan, Tony and Darrell have handled all this is the most careful manner trying very hard to be fair and within defined guidelines. They have added new forums for us to enjoy and post into and easy to search useful information.

Oh and by the way, those engineers accepted my edict because I was right!! As a matter of fact, I had the lowest personnel turn over in the corporation and the only way I could get rid of them was when they were promoted.

My personal thanks to the 3 admins because without TOTV I wouldn't be having the wonderful time I'm having since I moved here, and I wouldn't have the wonderful, giving, caring friends that I have made on this forum...
Thanks guys, !! Kath

[beady]

Gracie,

Thanks I do try to stay calm and see both sides of a story, and I just do not like seeing the posts become so contentious and consequently deleted. Tony, Darrell and Jan have taken on the task of keeping us all in line,and according to their guidelines they have the right to decide what to delete on their blog. I do not have to like it, but I will abide by their decision. We really are fortunate to have an outlet that is this informative, and, keeps us connected with the fulltime, snowbirds , and future Villagers.

As I said previously....can't we all agree to disagree and keep the comments civil.

On another note:
Chels is right, I make a mean Coka Cola Cake and I will gladly share the recipe.
I won't comment on being a nutcase

[tony]

Beady, why not put the recipe in The Villages Kitchen board? You saw me on the cruise. You know I will love the cake.

And by the way, folks, thanks for the kind thoughts.

[KathieI]

Originally Posted by beady

Gracie,

Thanks I do try to stay calm and see both sides of a story, and I just do not like seeing the posts become so contentious and consequently deleted. Tony, Darrell and Jan have taken on the task of keeping us all in line,and according to their guidelines they have the right to decide what to delete on their blog. I do not have to like it, but I will abide by their decision. We really are fortunate to have an outlet that is this informative, and, keeps us connected with the fulltime, snowbirds , and future Villagers.

As I said previously....can't we all agree to disagree and keep the comments civil.

On another note:
Chels is right, I make a mean Coka Cola Cake and I will gladly share the recipe.
I won't comment on being a nutcase

Beady, nicely said. Now, can I ask you for the recipe or do I have to go to the food channel to request it (oops, I mean the food thread!!)

[KathieI]

OOPS! Caught by the cop

and it only took 4 minutes... Tony your too fast!!

Beady, please post the recipe!!

[beady]

Okay, I will post the recipe on the kitchen board.

FYI all:It is beyond delicious and very easy to make...my kind of recipe.

[renielarson]

I appreciate the time and effort put forth by the admins. I want to know where I can send my donation so I can become vested in this venture.

[Boomer]

One of my favorite writers Mark Twain said, "It's easier to stay out than to get out." And I have been repeating that quote over and over to myself today as I wander in and out of the kitchen where this infernal computer lives.

Well, finally, I could not stand it anymore and I sat right down and pounded out my opinion on all this.

And I took a deep breath and I read through my post and I played devil's advocate and I thought some more. And then I finally hit send, with my fingers crossed that I had not just stepped into a minefield.

Well, guess what.

This thing had timed me out.

So I tried to print from the little box -- which I could retrieve. I could see my words there. So I hit Print, trying to get all the paragraphs. (You all know by now how much I like paragraphs.)

Well, anyway, I had to print 3 times, I thought, to try to capture all my paragraphs from that little box where they were taunting me. And I ran back the hall with high hopes to the printer which lives in Mr. Boomer's office. You know those touching scenes in the movies where they run in slow motion, propelled by love. Well, I loved my post. I did. I was in love with those words. And I planned to type it again from the hodge-podge of 3 printings from the little box.

And you know what that printer gave me back in return for my love. It gave me 3 full printouts of everybody else's responses to TH. My beloved words were nowhere to be found. Do you think maybe I was guilty of hubris or something?

So anyway, I remember one part. It was a quote from Mother Teresa. "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."

Well, I am no Mother Teresa. But I sure liked that quote.

And you know, if you look back at that quote and you remove the word "kind" and you substitute any antonym you can think of, well I think that gets the message across, too. Only better.

So basically, what I said in my long, long-lost post was, "Stopitstopitstopit." Let the admins make those tough calls. I learned pretty fast that Political is "Enter At Your Own Risk." ( I figured out the lay of the land there. My daggone Libra thing must make me weigh both sides and that just did not work for me there.) -- But I digress.

The point is, I do not want to see the rest of this place turn into "Enter At Your Own Risk."

Boomer

(And I just now looked at the Preview of this. And it told me I could only cuss 4 times and not 6. -- And the first one I wrote was a lot better.

[Talk Host]

Mark twain also said "a man who dangles a cat by the tail learns a lesson he can learn no other way."

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Boomer

One of my favorite writers Mark Twain said, "It's easier to stay out than to get out." And I have been repeating that quote over and over to myself today as I wander in and out of the kitchen where this infernal computer lives.

Well, finally, I could not stand it anymore and I sat right down and pounded out my opinion on all this.

And I took a deep breath and I read through my post and I played devil's advocate and I thought some more. And then I finally hit send, with my fingers crossed that I had not just stepped into a minefield.

Well, guess what.

This thing had timed me out.

So I tried to print from the little box -- which I could retrieve. I could see my words there. So I hit Print, trying to get all the paragraphs. (You all know by now how much I like paragraphs.)

Well, anyway, I had to print 3 times, I thought, to try to capture all my paragraphs from that little box where they were taunting me. And I ran back the hall with high hopes to the printer which lives in Mr. Boomer's office. You know those touching scenes in the movies where they run in slow motion, propelled by love. Well, I loved my post. I did. I was in love with those words. And I planned to type it again from the hodge-podge of 3 printings from the little box.

And you know what that printer gave me back in return for my love. It gave me 3 full printouts of everybody else's response to TH. My beloved words were nowhere to be found. Do you think maybe I was guilty of hubris or something?

So anyway, I remember one part. It was a quote from Mother Teresa. "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless."

Well, I am no Mother Teresa. But I sure liked that quote.

And you know, if you look back at that quote and you remove the word "kind" and you substitute any antonym you can think of, well I think that gets the message across, too. Only better.

So basically, what I said in my long, long-lost post was, "Stopitstopitstopit." Let the admins make those tough calls. I learned pretty fast that Political is "Enter At Your Own Risk." ( I figured out the lay of the land there. My daggone Libra thing must make me weigh both sides and that just did not work for me there.) -- But I digress.

The point is, I do not want to see the rest of this place turn into "Enter At Your Own Risk."

Boomer

(And I just now looked at the Preview of this. And it told me I could only cuss 4 times and not 6. -- And the first one I wrote was a lot better.

Boomer. I was kinda hopin' you were gonna Boom. It straightened everybody out the last time we all got in a rats nest.

Boomer. What does hubris mean?

Boom, in my mind you are a combination of Mother Teresa, Mary Poppins and that woman on television that knows about finances. I can't think of her name.

But the best part is that you are a Cincinnati girl. BUT are you EAST or WEST of 75?

[The Great Fumar]

I want to thank you and heck-of-lot for the dangers of holding a cat by the tail....
My curiosity got the better of me and so i tried it....

I get released to go home tomorrow....


Band aid fumar

[Boomer]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

Boomer. I was kinda hopin' you were gonna Boom. It straightened everybody out the last time we all got in a rats nest.

Boomer. What does hubris mean?

Boom, in my mind you are a combination of Mother Teresa, Mary Poppins and that woman on television that knows about finances. I can't think of her name.

But the best part is that you are a Cincinnati girl. BUT are you EAST or WEST of 75?

Oh Gracie, about that hubris thing, that having excessive pride or confidence. It'll get me every time. I was way too proud of the first post I wrote. I thought it was oh so perfect. I would cast calm upon the waters with it. Everyone would be overwhelmed by its magnificence. The sun would shine and the birdies would sing. And I would somehow be looking just like Grace Kelly as I bestowed my words upon TOTVland.

And so I was punished by the timing out and losing it all -- forever.

Remember those stories from mythology? Like the one about the guy who flew too close to the sun and he crashed and burned. In those old stories, if those mortals got carried away with their own wonderfulness, (Is that a word?) they always fell and fell hard. I was thinking my first post was so wonderful. I was guilty of hubris. Ah. . .for one brief, shining moment. . . in my mind.

Boomer

(Uh, I thought I did BOOM. Well, sort of. Just a little BOOM, maybe. Oh well.)

[another Linda]

Jan, please don't be discouraged. So many of us really love TOTV. It keeps us snowbirds connected, even ones like me who don't keep up with things.

[villages07]

Jan, Tony, DK....

Like the cicadas, we seem to go through these periodic cycles where some simple issue/statement/forum topic takes on a life of its own and turns ugly. The admins have the duty and the right to intervene when they feel things are getting out of control or too un-civil. It's never an easy call and will always end up ticking off someone, but, we'll get over it and move past it.

TOTV is a wonderful resource and meeting place. For old timers, newbies, and wannabes it is a tremendous source of information. It is a great way to meet people in your new hometown before you ever get here. And, great people they are. We live in a beautiful, wonderful community. We have much to be thankful for in TV and TOTV. Think before you post and sometimes think again before you decide whether a topic is even worth posting a negative reply. Often times it's better just to let it slide and remain silent.

To our admins, thank you so much for this wonderful site and all the work and soul you invest in it. Like the angst with the new version (which has now died down) these flareups will come and go. Please know that the vast majority of forum members really enjoy this site and appreciate your efforts.

[chelsea24]

Just wanted to add my thanks to you 3 admins. Without this site I would never have made all the wonderful lifelong friends I have. Especially in such a short time. We've been here less than a year and we have found people we truly love spending time with. The cruise was wonderful too!

I know you put up with a lot (moi? ) but I'll forever be grateful for the friendships I've made here because of you. Thank you. Sincerely, chels